Do you have something that you truly, relentlessly desire? Despite your state of life, is there something else that you would go completely to the end of the world to get? Well lucky for you, there’s a way to achieve what you’re looking for, and you won’t need to go to the end of the world to get it. But you will need to go somewhere, and the place may be too out of reach for some. It’s not far away, closer than one may believe but there’re requirements that some individuals may not meet.
First, whatever it is that you seek, know that you must seriously desire what you want. In your eyes, it should be something you need. If you begin the journey without the correct state of mind, you will surely fail, as it will be near impossible to turn back once the journey starts. The second requirement is that you will need a vehicle of sorts. Most use a car, as it’s the most comfortable choice. There have been a select few that have used small motorized vehicle, such as an ATV or motorcycle, but this has proven to be quite difficult, as the conditions of the journey can prove to be too bothersome.
Do not use a vehicle too large or noticeable, as you will need some of the cover of night to be most safe. Also, while any sort of car will do, you may not want to choose the most expensive or cherished vehicle. You can take your slick new black Mercedes for the drive if you’d like, but don’t expect it to come out in a pristine state. Make sure your vehicle is completely fueled before beginning the drive.
The first task to accomplish is to locate the road. It doesn’t have a name, it’s not on the map, and technically, it doesn’t even exist. It will only show up if you’re looking for it at the right time, and you will only spot it if you know what to look for. Finally, you must be alone during the journey. You didn’t think you’d be able to go with a group, did you?
It must be night when you begin. Choose the time of the night where you believe the roads are the least populated. Drive to any area that is just a stretch of road surrounded by woods. Here’s where you want to start paying close attention. If you’re looking for the road, it will turn up eventually, but you need to search for the road’s hint in order to pull down the right one. Once you’re close, you will see or feel its signs but what the signs will be will depend on what it is you desire. For example, if you’re in search of wealth, you may spot shimmers on the empty branches of trees as if they resembled the shine of gold or diamonds. If you seek love, you may begin to see rose petals slowly dance in the light breeze, blowing in the road’s direction. If you seek revenge, you might sense an ever growing feeling of heat or anger in your body as you approach. Just know what it is you really want, and you’ll have no problem finding the turn.
Once you’re sure you’ve found the revealed road, take a deep breath, and turn down onto it.
At this point, you have officially started down the nameless road which brings you through 11 miles, leading to whatever it is you seek. Each mile will test your desire, and will expose if you really do want what you’re searching for. Before you go any further, stop the car and be wary of a few advisements:
Do not turn on a radio during the drive.
Do not use a phone during the drive (reception would be cut off anyway).
Do not open the windows during the drive. Make sure they are closed before you continue. If you are riding a vehicle without windows or a top, then prepare for the worst, as the odds are heavily against you.
Do not attempt to leave your vehicle at ANY time.
You’ll never want to exceed 30 miles per hour, unless you’re desperate to make it through a section of the road.
And most importantly, as with any drive, buckle up.
Feel free to prepare and make sure you’re ready. Once the road has been entered, time has stopped so you don’t need to worry about losing the night. Though you may not notice, you’re not actually in your own world anymore. Take one last moment to realize that once the first mile is over there is no turning back. If you ponder turning back at all, know that you shouldn’t even be on the journey in the first place. Once all is done, continue on the road.
On the first mile, you won’t see much change. The road passes through mostly woods with a few miles being an exception. The air will turn a bit colder, in which you should turn on your heating system if the vehicle has one. You won’t want to take your eyes off the road later. Take some time to calm any uneasiness by admiring some of the night sky. You’ll see it completely lined with stars, more than what you would ever believe possible. If the weather was cloudy beforehand, you’ll also notice that the sky is now clear.
On the second mile, the air will become even colder. This is primarily the reason why traveling in an open vehicle is very difficult. With each mile, the air will drop in temperature even if the season should be warm. If the air is too cold to bear, even with the heat on, your only option is to speed up. With each mile the road also becomes more complex, taking more turns and showing an increasing amount of road hazards. Be sure to always keep focused on the road in front of you in order to avoid as many bumps or obstacles as possible. Hitting a few rocks and potholes won’t hamper your progress too much, but you’ll want to keep in the best condition for as long as possible. If you’re vehicle is forced to a stop because of damage, then there’s nothing left you can do but eventually freeze to death.
On the third mile, you may begin to spot silhouettes of human figures in the linings of trees. Pay no attention to them, even if they seem to get closer. It will be hard to resist peeking at their unnerving, distant appearance but know that they will reveal themselves later. At this mile, the road will become dirt if you weren’t driving on it in the beginning. Keep to the center of the path as it will become narrow and wide at random intervals. On a quick side note, should you ever attempt to turn around (despite the previous warnings) you’ll be left on a path which never ends. You would simply run out of fuel eventually, and be left to freeze in the cold conditions.
On the fourth mile, you will not only see more of the figures but you will begin to in a sense hear them. In the back of your mind, a very faint unintelligible whisper will echo. These will come and go, but you can’t stop them. If they become bothersome or distracting, try and tune them out by thinking of what it is you desire. Attempting to listen and determine what the voices are saying will only attract them to you, and you want to be as far away from them as you can. They’ll be closer later, so there’s no use bringing them near you this early.
On the fifth mile, you will come to a clearing. The lining of trees to your left will disappear to reveal a lake with no end with a beaming, great moon over the water. The illumination from the moon will be so spectacular that the vehicle’s headlights will no longer be required. Restrain yourself from gazing at it. If you look at its light for even more than a few seconds the road in front of you will end, throwing your vehicle into the water in which you will freeze in mere minutes. The voices will be gone for this mile, but don’t rejoice yet. They’ll be back.
On the sixth mile, take into account that you are more than halfway done. Despite the progress, you may lose hope here. The stars will have disappeared at this point, leaving the sky an empty, black abyss. The clearing will have ended, leading you back into the woods. The only light you will have will be provided by your vehicles headlights, but they will flicker from time to time even if you’re sure they’re in perfect working order.
If you have a radio in the vehicle, it will turn on here automatically. If you didn’t turn it off beforehand, it will produce an overwhelming screech that will send you off the path. A calm voice will then begin to speak about your greatest fears, what it is you are horrorified of in your life. It will speak in a way that will cause you to visualize the words in your mind, so don’t listen to it. If you begin to comprehend what it’s saying, the horrors will prove too much for you to stay on the road safely. Attempting to turn off the radio will prove no use. Speed up if you need to, just keep your mind off the voice as much as you can. As you approach the end of the mile, the voice will fade out of the speakers, leaving your ears at peace (for now).
On the seventh mile, the voices from the figures will return. It won’t sound like a whisper this time, but more like distant screams, growing closer with each second. At some point on this mile, you’ll hear one of them in your ear, as if one of them were right behind you. This is because one of the figures have found their way into your vehicle. Do not turn around. Their faces will shock you to a paralysis, leading you off the road. If you don’t draw attention to it, it will become uninterested, and hopefully leave. These beings are said to be ones who have travelled down this road before, but were not successful. They live the remainder of their existence suffering, in the darkness with their only goal being to bring other travelers down with them. It has been said from experience that these beings can’t physically harm you, so as long as they don’t cause you to wreck, you should be fine.
On the eighth mile, slow down if you’re going too fast. The road here takes very sharp turns, which if overshot will throw the vehicle into a pit through the trees. The cold is near fatal here. If you were to have a glass or bottle of liquid in your vehicle, it would be solid in seconds. The heating system will have become completely obsolete. Your headlights will flicker more, sometimes shutting off for a few seconds. You should break if this happens, but do not completely stop. The figures will be following you at this point, and should you stop for too long, they will surround and trap your vehicle. More of their screams can be heard from outside your doors, sometimes even sounding of maniacal laughter. Their hands will claw at your windows, desperate to reach in and feel something living. Do not look at them. They won’t block your windshield, and the last thing you want to happen is to crash and be trapped with them. If you don’t make it from here, pray that it’s the freezing that ends you.
On the ninth mile, your vehicle will stall. The headlights will shut off, as will all other systems inside. There’s nothing you can do to prevent this. What you will need to do is close your eyes and immediately attempt to restart the vehicle. Keep your eyes closed, as the figures would have surely surrounded you at this point. The starting of the vehicle will frighten them, and they will all back away temporarily. This will give you a chance to start moving forward again. If you begin to hear the windows crack from their struggle, don’t lose focus. The beings can alter the vehicle but remember that they still do not have the strength to physically affect you. You will hear nothing but their voices rampage in your mind, as there could be anywhere between a dozen or a hundred after you now. Once you start the vehicle, floor it. Floor it so long as you can stay on the path. When the mile’s done, the beings will retreat.
On the tenth mile, the voices of the beings will stop. If you were to look in your rear-view mirror (do not actually do this), you will see them following you but not as if they were chasing. They’re watching you, as if they were seeing you off. As you go down the tenth mile, the road will be smoother, as if you were back on the first mile. The figures will be lining the sides of the path ahead of you. They won’t be after you, but they will watch you as you pass. Some have theorized that the beings are impressed here, that you have come a long way on the journey to what you desire. This is false. They are not impressed, but they are happy. They are happy you are about to approach the next mile. They are happy because you are most likely going to your death.
On the eleventh and final mile, everything in your vehicle will lose power, as it did on the ninth mile. The vehicle would normally be immobile, but you will still be moving. An unknown force will be pulling you forward. In the darkness, you will see a glowing red light up ahead, as if it were a light at the end of a tunnel.
Close your eyes, and cover them. Do whatever it takes to make sure you do not see what you are about to go through. Covering your ears would also be helpful, but keeping your eyes covered should be a higher priority.
The red light is another clearing, but there’s no moon or lake this time. Once it’s entered, unrelenting and inconceivable noises will sound from all directions. No amount of bravery and conditioning will spare you from these sounds. The cold will turn to a merciless heat, burning all parts of the vehicle. You will feel the illusion of the flesh being burned off your bones, that every part of you is being destroyed as you travel through screams and audible suffering. As long as you keep your eyes closed, and resist the urge to see where you are, you will survive through the suffering. This will last a total of 31 seconds but many fail to keep their vision closed during that time and are left to the worst fate of the road. Where is this mile located? Those who have survived do not know. Some have named it “the transmission from hell” but whether it’s part of hell is debatable.
After the final mile, power will return. Stop the vehicle. Take a moment to possibly regain some of your sanity. Let the screaming in your ears begin to fade and know that you have nearly completed your journey with the hardest task overcome.
Breathe, and begin to drive forward once again.
After only a kilometer, your vehicle will arrive at a dead end. Stop here and don’t attempt to move again. Nothing will happen right this second but do not be disappointed. Relax and close your eyes. Imagine in your mind what it is you’ve desired the entire time. It will most likely still be the same as when you entered, but with some this desire may actually change through making this journey. Think about what it was that you went through such terrifying and difficult means to acquire and imagine possessing it in your hands.
Once you have completely visualized this, slowly open your eyes.
You will then find yourself at the beginning of the unnamed road, where you first began. This may confuse you, but know that you are finished. Your task is done.
Your mind will then turn to your reward. If what you desired was material, check in the back seat or in the trunk if the object is larger. If the object was small enough it might already be in your pocket. If what you desired was nonmaterial, then do not be disappointed if the change is not immediate. Turn back to where you came from, and you will find in your life that what you wanted is there. You may have found the love of your dreams. You may have gained unnatural, unimaginable power. You may have put your most hated enemy to the most satisfying revenge possible. You will have no doubt gained what you deserved.
So now that the task is done, what’s the catch? Is your vehicle cursed? Is there something you’re about to lose? Is your death imminent? The answer to all is no, of course. You’ve done the challenge. You’ve proved worthy of what you desire. As stated before, the sounds of the eleventh mile will continue to exist in your mind, potentially causing you some vivid and unusual nightmares but these should prove as nothing compared to what you’ve gained.
Now, one last question: Is there something else you desire? Are you not yet satisfied? After all, you’re left right back where you started. The road’s right in front of you, so are you up for another drive?
Posted in baby.... on April 22, 2020 by Blueshadow
Promite-mi ca ai sa ma uiti. Nu azi, nu maine dar candva. Spune-mi ca ai sa ma uiti ca pe o umbrela intr-un tramvai care nu se mai numeste “dorinta”. Dar acum recunoaste ca iti lipsesc. Iti lipsesc cuvintele mele, mainile mele facute caus in jurul canii de cafea sau mangaindu-ti obrajii aspri si teposi, degetele mele lipite de buzele tale moi si umede… Ti-amintesti? Covorul cu franjuri moi si cartile imprastiate peste tot, tabloul rasturnat si povestile pe care mi le sopteai incet la ureche – cand am nevoie de tine mi-aduc aminte de toate. Atunci ma uit in oglinda si te vad alaturi de mine. Esti undeva acolo, ascuns printre umbrele care traiesc in oglinda. Uneori am impresia ca fugi de mine ca sa ma necajesti si parca aud hohote de ras. Ma opresc din cautarile mele stangace si te ascult. Fireste ca te aud, doar sufletul meu prinde vibratia oglinzii si simte ecoul vocii tale de dincolo de sticla rece. Dar lumile din oglinda nu ma vor …
Atunci cred, de fapt stiu ca despartirea noastra nu se masoara in anotimpuri si ca poate sa treaca si iarna si vara, noi avem o viata inainte care inca ne asteapta. Cum spuneai tu, “eu sunt ca viata …” dulce-amar.
Keep moving, just keep moving don’t
stop to say goodbye, because then you
might stay and your pre-written end won’t work.
I stick my hand out and let a snowflake
drop onto my finger, look at the white speck
and say don’t leave me,
but it melts and
lands onto the ground where
I can’t help but crush the fragile structure of your dreams.
My eyes are black sockets in a shadowed
face with a frame of wind-messed hair,
and I think I cannot be this but the mirror won’t lie,right?
Break it, it lies.
Take a crisp white corner of your
unfinished fairytale and
write a message for me, send it though the
wind and pretend that I’ll catch it for you.
The most important things are the hardest to say. They are the things you get ashamed of, because words diminish them — words shrink things that seemed limitless when they were in your head to no more than living size when they’re brought out. But it’s more than that, isn’t it? The most important things lie too close to wherever your secret heart is buried, like landmarks to a treasure your enemies would love to steal away. And you may make revelations that cost you dearly only to have people look at you in a funny way, not understanding what you’ve said at all, or why you thought it was so important that you almost cried while you were saying it. That’s the worst, I think. When the secret stays locked within not for want of a teller but for want of an understanding ear.
Passion will undo the best of us and lead only to tragedy. It’s ever thus for those who care so deeply.
Do you not yet comprehend the wicked secret of the immortal?
All age and die, save you.
All rot and fall to dust, save you.
Any child you bear becomes a crone and perishes before your eyes.
Any lover withers and shrinks into incontinence and bent, toothless senility.
While you…
only you…
never age.
Never tire.
Never fade.
Alone.
But after a time you’ll lose the desire for passion entirely… for connection with anyone. Like a muscle that atrophies from lack of use. And one day you’ll realize you’ve become like them. Beautiful and dead. You have become a perfect, unchanging portrait of yourself.
An eternity without passion? Without affection? Caring for nothing? Small price to pay for such immortal perfection, isn’t it?
Cause once this land was Heaven on Earth
Green hills were all you could see
But now it’s soot and steel and brick
So it looks more like hell to me
And each day brings more and more suffering
And each night is silence and fear
And I wake to the sound of your voice
But you’re not here
Why aren’t you here?
So now I lay me down to sleep
I pray the Lord my soul to keep
Please let me die before I wake
So the Lord my soul can take
Then maybe I’ll finally find you
‘Midst the beauty of paradise
And you’ll sing not of dying but living
Wouldn’t that be nice?
Posted in baby.... on August 14, 2014 by Blueshadow
“E o zi de iarna tare friguroasa…de ceva vreme ma obsedeaza absenta ei si pare atat de aberant totul si ma intreb de ce ma obsedeaza tocmai acum?Pana acum unde am fost cu sufletul si cu inima?Unde mi-a fost mintea in tot acest timp?Tind sa cred ca tot la ea,dar am incercat sa maschez tot cautand-o in fiecare femeie care mi-a trecut prin mana chiar si prin pat,desi nu am facut dragoste niciodata.Pare ca vorbesc din basme,nu?Ce e cel mai ciudat,e ca am cautat-o in fiecare chip de femeie pe care am cunoscut-o.Intr-o zi mi s-a parut ca am vazut-o pe strada,purta un palton lung si stramt,avea parul ca al ei…i-am pus mana pe umar si am fost tare dezamagit.Stii cum mi-a batut inima in acel moment?Aveam sperante,insa mi s-au spulberat cand am constatat ca nu e chipul ei.Inca stau si ma intreb de ce am incercat sa o inlocuiesc cand puteam sa o am chiar pe ea?Nu-mi explic,iar acum simt ca acesta este cel mai mare lucru regretabil vreodata…Tot acum am invatat ca toate persoanele sunt diferite si ca este imposibil sa mai gasesc o persoana ca ea,o femeie ca ea chiar.Atunci cand iubesti o femeie din tot sufletul,iti ramane in cap complet si incerci sa ii transpui figura in fiecare dintre urmatoarele care vor trece pe drumul vietii tale.Era foarte frumoasa si cred ca a ramas la fel.Am cunoscut-o cand era doar un copil si avea trasaturile fetei foarte fine,am incercat sa ii caut defecte,insa nu am gasit unele majore.Acum ma gandesc,daca atunci era atat de frumoasa,in momentul de fata,cand este o femeie in toata firea,oare cum e?Cred ca straluceste desi niciodata nu si-a dorit asta.Bineinteles,avea si micile sale defecte,dar am invatat sa o iubesc asa cum era ea,fara sa vreau sa schimb ceva anume la personalitatea ori aspectul sau fizic.Stii cum e,cand iubesti cu adevarat o persoana pana si defectele ti se par calitati.
In drumul spre cautarea fetitei de atunci pe care am iubit-o si o voi iubi la nesfarsit,am intalnit mai multe tipuri de femei.Am reusit sa fac intr-un fel sau altul si o clasificare a lor.
Pentru inceput,cand ne-am despartit,am cautat sa-mi inec amarul in ce imi era la indemana:tigari,bautura,uneori droguri…si femei!Atunci am cunoscut femeia care intruchipeaza dezinteresul,era lipsita de orice sentiment,lipsita de respectul de sine…buna doar pentru o noapte,dupa care ar fi trecut fara regrete la altul ca mine.Am cunoscut-o foarte bine,noptile mi le petreceam cu acest tip de femeie pana cand mi s-a facut scarba de mine pentru ca imi era scarba de ea.Era pur si simplu inumana,traia doar pentru placerile trupesti,lucru care ma dezgusta cel mai mult la o femeie.Dupa ce m-am decis sa merg in continuare cautand-o pe ea,am descoperit tipul de femeie interesata,si nu,nu de mine ci de banii mei.Femeia materialista cum ii spun unii.Desi avea toate calitatile sa fie asa cum era,egoista,in goana dupa bani,prin analogie,femeia pe care o cautam arata la fel de bine,poate chiar si mai bine,insa nu era lipsita de orice sentiment si nu m-ar fi lasat poate niciodata sa ii dau bani,nici macar cu imprumut.Intotdeauna s-a descurcat cum a putut mai bine,iar acest lucru m-a facut sa merg si mai departe,sa trec si peste asta.In continuare,am intalnit femeia pe care la sfarsit am numit-o “femeia trofeu”.Parea ca se apropie foarte tare de ceea ce incercam sa inlocuiesc,asa ca ma stabilisem cat de cat,aveam impresia ca m-am intors de unde am plecat si aveam impresia ca imi e bine.Ravneau toti la ea,era inalta,supla,un chip de papusica.Ii placeau cluburile la nebunie,nu avea limita de stat undeva,nu era stresata de nimic,se putea duce pe unde sufletul ii dorea.Insa intr-o zi,m-am simtit mai rau ca niciodata,am rugat-o sa vina sa imi aduca niste medicamente,eu nu ma puteam ridica din pat,dar si bineinteles,sa stea cu mine.Fara nicio remuscare,mi-a raspuns nu,drept justificare a gasit faptul ca ii pare rau ca m-am imbolnavit,dar sanatatea ei este la fel de importanta si nu poate risca sa se imbolnaveasca doar din mofturile mele.Am fost foarte deprimat in ziua aceea,nu am avut in cap decat momentele in care cea pe care incercam sa o inlocuiesc din toate puterile,statea langa mine chiar si daca o respingeam,nu ii pasa de germeni,gripa si alte prostii…imi facea ceai in fiecare dimineata,ma acoperea intotdeauna cat mai bine si ma tinea in brate cat mai strans,doar ca sa transpir.Un gand mi-a fulgerat prin minte si m-am gandit doar cat de fericit este cel care o are acum si care trece prin momente dificile.Este in stare sa te ingrijeasca exact ca o mama…Intr-un final,am renuntat.Da,am renuntat sa mai caut femei asemanatoare,ma saturasem,mi-am dat seama ca norocul nu iti surade cand vrei tu,iar cand ti-a surs,important e sa stii cum sa profiti de el.Eu nu am stiut,si asa am pierdut-o pe femeia specie,intotdeauna delicata si atenta la gesturi si simturi.Femeia care nu s-a sfiit niciodata sa imi impacheteze hainele si sa mi le puna in dulap,femeia care facea patul in fiecare dimineata,cea care stie sa iubeasca neconditionat.Daca eu nu o mai pot gasi,imi doresc doar,cel care o incalzeste noaptea sa nu faca aceleasi greseli ca ale mele.Sa nu renunte la ceva ce altii si-ar dori cu ardoare,la ceva ce se obtine trudind,iar acel ceva e doar un suflet de femeie pe care daca il iubesti macar pe jumatate cat e el in stare sa iubeasca,iti va da mai mult decat ceri…”
-Eu tot nu inteleg de ce ai renuntat la ea daca pentru tine era perfecta…
-Simteam ca imi trebuie altceva,simteam ca ritmul trebuie schimbat.Insa am realizat ca am plecat ca sa am unde sa ma intorc,ea inca era acolo,dar nu mai era pentru mine…
Există, din când în când, pentru fiecare dintre noi, un moment ca nici unul altul.
Te uiți la omul de lângă tine. Îl auzi vorbind. Îl vezi mișcându-se.
Îți explică o banalitate. Râde. Sau e supărat.
Poate să fie un prieten apropiat, un coleg, o rudă, partenerul tău sau pur și simplu un om drag.
Și te lovește. Te uiți la omul de lângă tine și îți dai seama că vrei să îți fie aproape toată viața. Întreaga ta viață. Într-un fel sau altul, vrei să fie acolo. Toaaaaată viața.
Celălalt își vede liniștit de treabă, complet neștiutor în ceea ce privește amploarea momentului ce tocmai a avut loc.
Se joacă liniștit cu sosul de la spaghete, scrie ceva concentrat pe o foaie, povestește cu altcineva, termină de zis un banc care nici măcar nu e așa de haios sau te ascultă cuminte în timp ce vorbești.
Există din când în când un moment.
Se întâmplă rar, cu puțini oameni și adesea nici măcar noi nu suntem conștienți de apariția lui.
Este acea fracțiune de secundă în care mintea ta ia decizia definitivă să elibereze un sertar în care persoana din fața ta să își poată depozita o bucățică din ea. Pentru o vreme. Pentru o viață. Și atunci când reușești să prinzi acest moment, să devii perfect conștient de acea fracțiune de secundă care se petrece, ai parte, de departe, de cel mai frumos și curat moment care poate exista între doi oameni.
Există din când în când un moment.
Să-i spunem momentul fluture.
Durează puțin, dar cuprinde în el o viață întreagă.
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