Best When Used By…Plus Three

Black eye was gone in 2 weeks.  Whew.  Got tired of receiving “poor battered wife” glances from people.

Peach and Mac are walking!  Nearly 15 months it has taken them.  Peach is a champ.  She toddles all over the bloomin’ place.  She is definitely a go-getter.  she toddles over to her plastic rocking horse, climbs on and rocks for all she’s worth!  She loves to talk and thinks she is incredibly brilliant for saying things like, “rocky, rocky, rocky” while riding her rocking horse, or for shaking her head vehemently “no!” when I ask her if she wants to go night-night.  She eats anything, bless her soul, but is a dirty rotten thief and steals any toy Mac might have in his hand which she decides is appealing.

Mac is my precious, sensitive boy.  He’s walking, but just barely.  His little knees and ankles seem to give out as he tries to rush along.  He seems to be a Type B, which is a good thing, since he doesn’t seem to mind generally when Peach grabs away his toys…he just finds himself another one.  He is a pickier eater but melts my heart when he eats something he likes and says “Mama!” with urgency when he wants another bite.  Both of them love to say “Ruff! Ruff!” in their own way when asked “What does a puppy say?”

Our family room has been made twin-friendly.  Two 8×10 rugs (no, they don’t match) affixed side by side cover the hard tile floor.  A super long extended baby gate (panels) circles one side of the the room to block them from the fireplace, the hallway, the TV table and the stairs.  They can toddle all over the place down there, which is great for practicing walking.

Scout only occasionally bothers the twins, but he loves them too.  He likes to help feed them (only jamming a spoon in their mouths too hard on occasion) and likes to hold one of their hands and help them walk along.  Scout can amazingly carry a tune.  He cannot pronounce certain sounds (still has trouble with “sh” and some others) but by golly, when he sings “Heads, Shoulders, Knees and Toes” it is amazing how in-tune he is.

To An Offering of Love:  I’m so sorry — you asked some time ago about how we helped Scout prepare to move.  My days have been so endless that I never responded to you.  I haven’t even checked your FB page recently to see whether you moved or not.  It’s been a few months, so you probably have.  But just in case, here’s what we did:  We talked repeatedly to Scout about moving and our “new house.”  We told him what it would be like and reassured him about things (like the fact that the new house would have walls).  We spoke about the new house positively and didn’t talk sadly about our “old” house ( which would make Scout sad).  We let Scout pack some of his things into boxes (which of course I re-packed properly later) so that he felt included in the process.  We took him to the new house once we signed the lease and showed him around, exclaiming excitedly about everything (wow…and here’s our NEW bathroom!).  We also let him put some things away in his new room and although it was a busy time, took time to play with him in the new yard and explore the neighborhood with him.  Anyway, I hope your move is or was seamless!

Wow, I forgot I even wrote the last post till I came to my own blog site tonight.  Time is fleeting. So is my memory.

We’re in the new place and the sale of our house will likely close this Friday.  It will be good to have that monkey off our backs. Trying to settle into the new place while making trips to the old place to wind things up has been a challenge.  Our new neighborhood is fantastic – really great neighbors (4 sets of twins in our neighborhood!) and paved trails through wooded areas that many people use for walking, jogging, biking, etc.  We take Scout and the twins to the park every weekend – about a mile down the trail.  The house is “okay” and my commute is much longer, but the neighborhood is great.

Sigh.  It seems I’m mad at Mr. BWUB most of the time.  It’s not a good feeling.  Three young children require SO MUCH care and attention.  I love my kids and of course I would do anything for them and being their mom fills me with joy.  I just wish I saw the same degree of dedication from my husband – and the lack thereof makes me feel like he is selfish and lazy.  It infuriates me.  I’m sure HE thinks he does a lot around here, but I’m too exhausted to make my case.

The other day I found myself changing Mac’s diaper.  I took the wet one off.  Scout was bouncing around the room behind me, talking to me and asking me questions.  “Mommy….Mommy….Mommy…” and I kept saying, “What, Scout?…..what?…..what?”  I reached in the drawer, took out a pair of Scout’s underwear and started putting them on Mac.  Scout stopped his bouncing, came over to stand right next to me and said, “Mommy, those are MY underpants!”  Good grief.  My brain is fried.

I went to the grocery store over the weekend.  I filled the cart and when checking out, asked if I could get some help out to my car (bag boys and girls typically will help you out with your cart and load your groceries into your car for you).  The bag boy and I walked out into the lot and I pointed to the gray Honda minivan about half way out in the lot and said, “It’s the gray minivan right there.”  We got about half way to the van when I realized I hadn’t driven the minivan to the store…..I’d driven the Audi wagon.  How embarrassing.  Particularly since I then had a hard time remembering where I parked the Audi.  It took me a moment to redirect the bag boy.  I’m really losing it.

And just when you think you couldn’t be any more tired….the twins start learning to walk!  Peach is determined to practice until she can do it.  Which means lots of narrowly catching a falling baby at the last minute!  Mac is not quite as committed to the idea, but why should he be in any hurry since he is  proficient at crawling and it takes him everywhere he wants to go?  It does seem though, that both of them will pull themselves up to standing and want to walk to me at the same moment.  Yikes!  It can be a bit of a challenge as I try to help/catch both of them simultaneously.

Scout loves the new house and is adjusting well.  I’m glad at least that the kids are all transitioning well with the move.

So, onward we chug.  My kids won’t be this little forever.  I try to remind myself of that – and every ramification.  I need to both cherish these times and remember that one day they will be bigger and I will once again have my brain to myself for periods of time.  I’ll have time to relax and things will be easier.  And remembering which car I drove to the grocery won’t be as difficult.  In the mean time, a good friend referred me to the marriage counselor she and her husband use.  I’m beginning to think it might be a good idea to go.

So little time to post or comment anymore.  I think of you all often, I just can’t seem to find time (before I’m bleary-eyed exhausted at night) to blog.  At the moment, I’m appeasing the twins with puff snacks so I can type 10 words at a time.

Peach and Mac will be a year old soon.  I remember Scout at 11 months old.  The time has flown, but that’s a good thing, I think.  It’s been a crazy year, as I’m sure other moms of twins can attest to.  A blur, really.

So here is a photo of Peach and Mac playing together.  In a moment, no doubt, Peach will reach over and either pull Mac’s hair or attempt to pull his ear off.  It’s what she does.  And yes, Mac is wearing Peach’s pink flower pajamas.  That happens a lot around here.  Vice versa too (Peach wearing Mac’s blue cars pajamas).  You know, whatever is clean.

In other news, Mr. BWUB got laid off from his job at the end of June.  Good thing we were already in the midst of short selling our house.  He anticipated the layoff.  The sale of our home is nearly complete and we’ll be moving the last week of August.  The real commentary on the economy is this:  the house we’ll be renting is more than 1,000 square feet BIGGER than our current house and rent will be more than $1,000 LESS than our mortgage was.  So, yeah, Mr. BWUB loses his job, our financial situation worsens  – and as a result we’ll get to live in a dream house.  Go figure.

Speaking of finances, as we’ve begun the cleaning process around here, I came across an old bank receipt from my savings account as of May 2007.  Wowee.  I had money in those days.  I looked around the room at my 3 kids and thought what it cost us (well, me – it was my money we spent) to have these kids.  I looked back at the receipt.  Yup, that about accounts for the difference.  And although I loved it, all the maternity leave I took kept me from starting to save much again.  Ah well.  Money is just money.  My kids are priceless (I say as Peach throws her sippee cup on the floor for the 15th straight time, and whines about it and Mac drools his water all down the front of him).

Nearly one year old.  Love  ’em.

I’m at the end of my rope.  Scout is testing every boundary and my nerves are shredded.  I don’t know how to best manage this.  Today, after work, I picked up Scout as usual.  Once home he was bouncing off the walls (so typical these days) as I tried to entertain the twins – Peach had just awakend from a nap and needed some activity and Mac needed a nap but wouldn’t, so he was a bit cranky.

I put quilts on the floor and all 4 of us climbed on.  I had toys for Peach and Mac, but Scout would grab them and not let the twins have them.  I got another toy and told Scout this was for the babies.  He then rolled on the quilt, trying to roll into Peach.  I told him to back up a little bit.  Then he moved his socked foot toward her face while she was on her belly.  I told him DO NOT put your foot in Peach’s mouth!  Then he pretended to kick at her while she was sitting up and I looked at him sternly and said, “Do NOT kick the babies.”  He looked at me, hauled off…and actually kicked her over!  Not hard enough to really hurt her (although she cried hard enough), but I couldn’t believe it!  I was so angry.

Usually I put Scout in the Naughty Spot when he disobeys.  But this was BIG.  This was not failing to pick up his toys when asked, this was intentionally hurting his sister.  The Naughty Spot seemed piddly for something so big.  I didn’t know what to do….how to punish this….how to make him understand that I will NOT tolerate this type of behavior.

What do YOU do in this type of situation?  If your child doesn’t have a sibling, what do you do when your child hits you?  Or does something that appears to be malicious?

I know he’s only 3.  I know he’s jealous of the twins (over the weekend he told me that he doesn’t like it when Mommy and Daddy have to feed the babies.  I explained to him how it won’t be forever and how just like he is able to feed himself, one day the babies will be bigger and will feed themselves too).  Today I went to great lengths (after I exploded in anger and had time to cool off) to explain to Scout that I love him very much, as much as I love the babies and that I have enough love for all of them.

BELIEVE ME, we spend a ton of time with Scout.  Last night I did the entire evening routine with the twins so Mr. BWUB could go outside and play with Scout in the yard.  Last weekend when we had an open house (yes, we are selling the house – one of the big changes going on here), my mom took the twins and Mr. BWUB and I took Scout to the zoo and to a fun local place.  For hours.  Just the 3 of us.  In the evenings after the twins go to bed, Scout gets to stay up with us and have a snack till his bedtime.  It’s not like the twins get all attention all the time.

I just don’t know how to respond to severe boundary testing (ie, hitting/kicking siblings or us).  Help!