For me, the answer seems to be yes. When I was diagnosed with Cancer, it was an extremely difficult period of my life. The uncertainty, the sense of doom, and the feeling that my life was no longer in my control all led to a tremendous spurt of creativity. I wrote about my experience, opening up mentally and emotionally what I was feeling. It was completely out of character for me. I shared short stories that had been floating around in my head and came up with new ones. From being a shy introverted writer, I started to flourish and take risks. When I started, I had no real goal in mind, but eventually I determined that I would be a published author come hell or high water.

It’s been almost a year since I’ve self-published my memoir on Kindle. By publishing, I accomplished my goal and my creativity self-destructed. Wait? What?

My imagination and desire to write completely fell apart. Sure I tried to jump-start it, but my heart wasn’t in it. You see, I had focused on the incredibly hard feat of publishing, that when it happened, I found myself focusing on sales. I have hoped that it would take off and hundreds, thousands, nay, millions of people would buy my book. That’s what therapists call “unrealistic expectations”. To date, I think I’m at about 60 units sold. Granted, it could have been better if I had concentrated on marketing the book, but that’s not an area that I excel at.

Since publishing, I’ve again had to go through an difficult time. This time, it is job-related. Quite frankly, I work for a toxic boss. It is stressful at work every day. Last December, because of the stress, I had an Afib episode where I had to go to the emergency room.

What’s Afib? Quite simply, it is an irregular heartbeat. My heart rate would jump to 160 beats a minute and then drop to 40 beats a minute in the span of seconds. Then jump back up to 180 and continue erratically. Afib is dangerous because it can cause blood clots to form in the chambers of the heart which could travel to the brain and cause a stroke.

I saw a respected cardiologist that did quite a few tests. I had to start taking daily medications to help control my heartbeat, plus a blood thinner to combat any blood clots that might form. This seemed to control my Afib until last July. In the span of three weeks, I had two episodes that were severe enough that it meant trips to the emergency room where they injected medication into my bloodstream to get my heart rate normal. The daily medication wasn’t helping anymore.

Let’s take an aside here and look at the main factors that can cause Afib.

• Overweight
• Lack of physical exercise
• High Blood pressure
• Stress

The first three don’t apply to me as I’m slender and I work in a physically demanding job. Plus, I’ve always had a naturally low blood pressure. Stress is the main cause of my Afib. To complicate matters, the medication I am taking also lowers blood pressure. Both episodes in July started off by my blood pressure dropping very low. My normal blood pressure is 110/60. I threw on a blood pressure cuff on the first episode and it read 70/40. I know that my blood pressure was lower than that when I went into Afib as I felt like I was blacking out.

My next step was to see a Cardio Electrophysiologist. After a consultation, he recommended one of three treatments. I could take a medication that was extremely expensive and most insurance companies wouldn’t cover it. Or I could take another medication, but that required 3 days in the hospital where they would monitor me and figure out the correct dosage. Either way, the odds of me having another Afib would be only 50/50.

The third option was to have an ablation done to my heart. This is where they go through the femoral veins in my legs and by triggering the different nerves to my heart they would determine which ones were triggering my Afib. Then the doctor would cauterize the nerve. The odds of having not having an Afib after that would be about 80%. Much better odds than the medication and as a bonus, I will be able to stop taking heart medication after 90 days.

I had the procedure done last week and am recovering very well.

Meanwhile, shortly after my second Afib, I was recommended for a position in the corporate side of the business I work in. It is an ideal position as it would require me to work in an office environment that is no where near my toxic boss. After going through the interview process, I was sent a job offer letter last Monday. Naturally I signed it immediately. Plus there is a hefty pay raise in taking this position.

The last two days of work, while tense at first, have been stress free. My toxic boss was upset, but has accepted that my last day will be September 13th. I have 10 working days left at the company. It’s going to be filled with training people to take over my numerous responsibilities. It feels like I’m getting paroled from prison.

Remember the original question? Does Difficulty Spur Creativity? In my case, I’m not sure. When diagnosed with cancer, I found a tremendous burst of creativity. During this last year, with all that has gone on, I’ve not once felt the desire or need to write anything. Now, that the uncertainty and stress of the unknown with my heart, not to mention the job, is over. Life is good.

Suddenly, I felt like writing again. I’ll be the first to admit that I have no clue what spurs my creativity. Will this last? Who knows? But for tonight, it feels good to write again.

I’ve been the recipient of the silent treatment more times than I can shake a stick at it. At first, it bothered me to no end. Mostly because I had no idea why I was being given the short shrift and ignored. Foolishly, I would confess to almost anything to get my loved one to resume talking with me.

I often wondered why this punishment was so effective. I finally realized my own insecurities were to blame. I wanted to be liked, loved, adored and wanted. Who doesn’t? I felt less than when confronted with silence. I would pick a fight in order to get a response. Other times, I would go all out in a romantic gesture. Most of the time, it didn’t work. The only solution was to wait out the silent treatment.

I tried doing the silent treatment to my loved one a few times. It didn’t last long as I’m not that stubborn. Also, it made me feel worse. I realized I was only hurting myself.

After suffering for years, my attitude has changed. It’s a blessed relief to not to have to listen to blathering’s that I have no interest in. Is that wrong? Maybe, but when my loved one chooses to remove themselves for days from my company and conversation, then perhaps they are the ones at fault, no matter what their justification for the silent treatment.

Life gets so much more simpler when you cry out “Oh NO!”, followed by an understated, “Anyways”.