My heart aches..
It beats with subdued hope..
Screaming out to me..
The screams so loud and yet so quiet..
Throbbing so deeply it weighs down my entire body..
The agony so hefty my heart developed pricks..
Puncturing my chest, my heart wounds me..
As I try to breath in and out, my heart breaks..
Shattering and spraying across my chest..
As I breath in and out I feel the pricks piercing my soul..
I feel dizzy, lightheaded..
My vision becomes blurry, my ears start ringing..
The agony persists..
My heart carries a burden..
So heavy it feels like I carry a dead dragon
Dragging me down its as if I’m pulling a wagon
I woke up with a profound sadness..
Edged deep into my bones..
I couldn’t shake it no matter what I did..
No matter how hard I tried it wouldn’t leave me..
I tried to replace it, to forget it with my favourite things..
I frolicked with friends..
I took long walks in nature..
I smelled the flowers and wrapped them around my head..
I read a beloved book underneath the canopy trees..
I danced in the rain in my favourite dress..
And yet the sadness wont leave me..
The sadness digs her claws deeper..
Grabbing hold onto my heart..
Wrapping her long limbs around my heart tightly..
So tight I can barely breathe, barely see in front of me..
Whispering in my soul harshly..
“We are one now”..
I have this fantasy
Him on me, you on me, the three of us intertwined
Four hands across my body
Searching, caressing every inch of me
Two lips savouring mine
Drinking me in like they have a desert thirst
Their eyes, holding me down, holding me captive
Voices gruff, deep, searching for what I need
Two strong, muscular, hard male bodies
Mine to relish as I wish
There to satisfy every desire, every need, every fantasy
A moment in time, a sliver of pleasure
A dream finally come true
In the darkest hour of the night..
In the deepest comfort of my covers..
In the depths of my memory..
I reflect back on that night..
Relishing the feel of your hands all over my body..
Reminiscing on the taste of your lips on mine..
Recalling the way your voice sounded as you whispered my name hoarsely..
In this quiet, dim room I long for you..
I desire the soft caress of your callused hands..
I crave the heaviness of your body on top of mine..
I desire the raw passion that burns between us..
I yearn for the euphoria of our intertwined bodies..
We walked into the room and the air around us crackled
The air felt charged. With electricity. With lust
The tension that filled the room felt as if it would choke us
He held my hand gently, yet firmly
Giving me a chance to release if I wanted to, but urging me to come
Stopping in the middle of the dimly lit room
The whole room light with candles
Making the room even more sexy, alluring, utterly intoxicating
With one look he asked a question,
“Are you sure about this? Do you want this?”
Instead of an answer I leaned in for a kiss
The kiss starting off sweet, gentle, tentative even
Quickly turning passionate, hungry, impatient
His hands sliding across my body, making me dizzy
Gliding across every part of my body
Our bodies pressed tightly against each other
Clothes haphazardly torn off in a frenzy of want and need
Just when I think he is about to take me roughly
He slides down, gets on his knees and looks up at me
Slowly lifting up my thigh to rest on his shoulders
He devours me hungrily, like a man starved
Every nibble, every lick, every suck drawing me closer to nirvana
In that moment there is no regret, no guilt
No other feeling than utter bliss..
Bury me in your kisses..
Until I cant breath..
Until my knees buckle..
Until my body shivers..
Until my soul sings..
Sometimes reminiscing
brings nothing but pain
And yet still at times foresight
Brings even more sorrow
I watch you..
Walking around the dimly lit room..
Your robe hanging lose around those broad shoulders..
And I feel a shiver roll down my spine..
A light tremble travels through my body..
Salivating over the delicious ways we were intertwined..
Merely hours back..
My eyes travel slowly back up to your face..
Where our eyes lock into each other..
Your lips start moving into s slow smirk..
As if you have seen every dirty thought running through my head..
In that moment I knew..
You have already captured every part of me..
Mind, body and soul..
I am yours..
I still get chills when I think about that day
The day you walked into my life and gave it colour
Changing my existence forever
You towered over me
Standing so close we shared the same air
Gazing deep into my eyes it felt like you saw a part of my soul
Softly holding my face in both of your big, strong hands
As you closed your eyes and took a deep breath I felt lightheaded
The longer we stood there, unmoving, the faster my heart beat
Your eyes shifted so quickly from mine, down to my lip and back
I could have sworn I imagined it
You moved your right hand from my face and ever so gently touched my lower lip with your thumb
Then in a deep, gravely voice whispered
“I have been thinking about tasting you since the day I lay my eyes on you“
I tried to respond but all that came out of my mouth was a low sigh
Grabbing your waist I flattened my soft body against your hard one
Attempting to get as close to you as humanly possible
Then realizing that I was close as I could ever get
As you stood there, unmoving, you continued to stare straight into my eyes
As if searching for something, my approval, my agreement, my denial?
I gazed right back, my entire body trembling with need, with anticipation
Closing your eyes, finally after what could have been a few seconds but felt like a lifetime
You brought your lips down onto mine
Ever so lightly, a bare brush of our lips I could have thought I imagined it
You stopped, looked back into my eyes and brought your lips down on mine again
With a bit more pressure this time you did not stop
I felt myself unravelling as I kissed you back with a fervor
As our bodies melting into one another the whole world disappeared
The floor below us dissipated, the walls around us vanished
And suddenly it was just the two of us, our lips locked, our hands searching
Our bodies molded into one, our minds connected
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