• Color Fun 2

    May 24, 2025
    retirement, Uncategorized
    Color Fun 2

    A month or so ago, I wrote about having fun with color making prints with shaving cream and food coloring. I do like playing with color. I mentioned then that I was exploring making a quilt, one that had lots of color and looked not too technically complex.

    Well, I did it! I made the quilt! It came out pretty well for a first attempt. Below is a photo of the quilt top. The top, along with a backing and batting is now at a local quilt shop, inline to be machine quilted. These newfangled inventions are pretty cool–long arm quilting machines with all manner of programmed patterns. Quite different from sitting around at a quilting bee or on one’s own making thousands of tiny stitches by hand. I was happy to hand it off and pay a modest fee to have someone else do that work. I should have it back in a month or so, then I can put on the binding and it will be done!

    My quilt top. The color is a bit off in this photo, with the background fabric more of the deep purple seen lower left. I took it in to be quilted before I thought to take a photo of the backing fabric, which is quite different. Lots of learning!

    The color and pattern part of my brain is waking up. I noticed that I think about design possibilities at quiet times, and my FB feed now brings up quilting sites and fabric and pattern possibilities. I’ve decided that I will do this pattern again in black and white, with small pops of color. I’ve ordered some fabric, and we will see what happens.

    It is fun doing this, not too complicated, and its tangible, which I appreciate a lot right now, as much of my time is spent “putting out the fires” , which is part of the caretakers journey. Did you know that if you put a mug of coffee on top of the toilet paper holder in the bathroom, the mug is likely to fall and spray coffee all over? This morning’s adventure. The good news is that the mug didn’t break, no one was burned, and the wall and space behind the toilet got a good cleaning. And I didn’t even scream out loud or run away, although those options were considered. It helps me to split my time between these necessary chores and playing, whether with color and quilts, reading, or helping the growing things in my garden. Depends on the day.

    9 comments on Color Fun 2

  • Color Fun

    April 19, 2025
    essays, living, ragtag daily prompt, retirement, Uncategorized
    Color Fun

    Visiting the Denver Art Museum some years back, I found myself in the “kids” area. There were classes, opportunities to make stuff, all manner of enticing stuff. One of the projects they showed resulted in little abstract prints.

    Studying the displays (to the dismay of BA who wasn’t interested and wanted to go to lunch), I found a simple project. Take a tray, smear it with shaving cream, dot with gel food coloring, swirl it around, and then press paper on the swirls. Remove and you’ve got a picture. Well, nothing for it but to try once we were home. A quick trip to the shops and I was set up. It was fun! I love playing with color and patterns and experimenting with designs. And as all these components were relatively inexpensive and easily obtained, no worries on “wasting” one’s supplies. Play! What could be better?

    I saved a few of these, imagining that I might make them into cards or decorations of some sort. That hasn’t happened, but as I write this, I might head to the basement and make some more. We shall see.

    I spent some time yesterday looking at a possible quilt to make. Again, it’s about color and pattern, and this particular one has many possibilities, without being too fiddly and precise, which takes the fun out of it for me. As I was lying in bed last night I found myself playing with different patterns, colors and design possibilities. I’m happy to have this part of my brain lighting up and engaged after what feels to be a very long stretch.

    One of my current challenges is finding ways to be engaged and creative within the constraints of caregiving. Playing with color appears to be emerging as a path to follow.

    Inspired by today’s ragtag daily prompt of abstract.

    8 comments on Color Fun

  • First things, first

    April 1, 2025
    Uncategorized
    First things, first
    Daily writing prompt
    What are your morning rituals? What does the first hour of your day look like?
    View all responses

    I’m up. Put on sweats and slippers. Visit toilet if needed. Turn on hot water cooker. Feed the cat. Get out two coffee mugs. Put filters in filter holders, and moisten. Add ground coffee to each filter. Fill BA’s mug halfway with milk, add a touch of half and half to mine. Water boiled? Moisten the coffee grounds, then fill with hot water. BA’s mug full? Into the microwave oven for 1.35 to get the whole thing hot. Add more hot water to my pour over. Go outside for the newspaper. Come back in, pick up my I pad, collect both coffees and head to the sitting room for a quiet read, a few puzzles, and coffee to start the morning. Elapsed time from rising: 10-15 minutes. Ahhhh.

    4 comments on First things, first

  • What’s up, Oldster?

    February 13, 2025
    essays, retirement, Uncategorized, whatsamatta
    What’s up, Oldster?
    Daily writing prompt
    What were your parents doing at your age?
    View all responses

    At my current age, my mother had been dead for close to a dozen years. I don’t know what she’s been up to since she departed the earth plane. Maybe I’ll find out later, maybe I won’t.

    When he was 69, Dad had remarried, been retired from the university for 4 years and was enjoying his increased free time by flying his newly purchased small plane and glider. I think my stepmother hadn’t expected that, but his kids weren’t surprised–he’d long loved to fly, but had stopped when Mom insisted, stating she didn’t want to be a widow with 4 young children. So Dad went back to flying when he no longer needed to provide for a family, and he had time to play in the skies. He also continued with his usual physical activities of running and hiking. I suspect that is part of the reason he lived in pretty good health until he was 90. Good genetics likely also contributed, as many of his relatives were quite long lived as well.

    And how am I spending my days? I’ve now been retired for close to 3 years, and I haven’t purchased an airplane, nor am I likely to. Flying planes is just not my thing. I did get a van, hoping to spend much of my retirement traveling with a very loose agenda and lots of curiosity, but unfortunately the van was sold when it became clear that my partner’s health issues would preclude her traveling much and also limit her ability to live independently. For now, my primary job is as caretaker and home manager. It is clearly not what I imagined or wanted, and its what circumstances have provided. I endeavor to get regular exercise, most of it at or near home. Planning is tricky, as its hard to predict what a given day will bring.

    In two weeks, I will have a much needed week of respite, with BA’s sister in law staying with her for part of the time, and a friend for the rest. Me, I’m going to San Diego and staying in a little beach cabin. No schedule to follow, ocean to see and walk along, days to spend as I see fit. I’m not the garrulous type, so I may visit with folks I encounter along the way, or I may not. For me, it feels like the ultimate luxury to simply see what comes. I am very ready, and extremely grateful for the support of friends and family so that I do get a break. A very different retirement than the explorations I had dreamt of, and I continue to hold to the possibility of that dream coming true over time. We shall see.

    Today’s featured photo is of a very young me at the beach–it’s long been a favorite place of mine.

    3 comments on What’s up, Oldster?

  • And now, something different

    February 9, 2025
    Uncategorized
    And now, something different
    Daily writing prompt
    Are there any activities or hobbies you’ve outgrown or lost interest in over time?
    View all responses

    A friend of mine was called a “serial hobbyist” by his now ex-wife. I think the term applies to me as well. When I’m involved with something, I often go deeply into it, becoming quite the nerd on whatever it may be. And then, as circumstances change or interest wanes, the subject is dropped and I move on.

    Some of the activities that have been passions whose time has past are gymnastics, downhill skiing, figure skating, triathlon, technical rock climbing, glass working (bead making and fusing), and organic gardening.

    Other activities remain on my list, although with varying degrees of participation at any given time–darn those life circumstances! These include reading, cooking, travel, writing, music, hiking, and there are probably others that aren’t bubbling to the surface at the moment.

    2 comments on And now, something different

  • It Tastes Bad Can it be Good?

    January 22, 2025
    cats, Uncategorized
    It Tastes Bad Can it be Good?
    Daily writing prompt
    If you could make your pet understand one thing, what would it be?
    View all responses

    That I’m not giving her bitter medicine to be mean, but to help her heal. It is working, her lip sores are healed, her rash is gone, and now we are tapering off the medicine. While she knows if I pick her up late afternoon, it could be “that time” and will run if we’re both in the dining room (the venue where the dreaded meds are given), she doesn’t seem to hold a grudge and continues to interact with me, including sitting on me during morning coffee and snuggling close at night. So I suspect she does understand, she just doesn’t like it. Can’t fault her there.

    And she often gifts me a mousie on the bed during the night.

    Keep healing and stay well, dear Irene. You are a gift in my life!

    3 comments on It Tastes Bad Can it be Good?

  • After the Fire. Three Years Later

    January 8, 2025
    essays, marshall fire, The natural world, Uncategorized
    After the Fire. Three Years Later

    December 30, 2021. The Marshall fire, propelled by hurricane force winds, roars through my community. More than a thousand homes were lost, 2 people died, and more than a thousand pets also died, trapped in an inferno that precluded their rescue.

    January 4, 2025. It’s three years later, a cold and foggy morning. We survived the anniversary date, complete with high winds and a red flag warning without catastrophe. I’m walking from my house to the arboretum on the bike path which runs behind my house. It takes just a few minutes to reach burned areas. At first, I just see scorched fence posts, and rebuilt fences, the stumps of trees. A block or so later, entire homes have been rebuilt. As I enter the arboretum, the street along its southern perimeter is full of new homes, all rebuilt since the fire. There are still a few empty lots, scraped and staked to begin construction, and even fewer for sale signs attached to lots. Those who moved on, spurred by choice, trauma, or underinsurance, seem to have moved.

    At the center of the arboretum stands a new sculpture, honoring the many animals lost to the fire. On its stone base are snakes, lizards, bunnies, dogs, cats and birds. It’s a poignant and important reminder. On the gravel nearby are scattered a number of stones, decorated and placed in honor of a specific pet. I know many who lost their homes and belongings, and a few who also lost a beloved animal. The pain of that loss was nearly immobilizing for months. For those I have spoken with, the pet loss was the most challenging part of this tragedy. As someone who dearly loves my animals and was able to successfully evacuate with my cat, and able to return to a standing home with minimal smoke damage, I feel incredibly fortunate.

    We are all healing, and mostly moving on, but with a continued vulnerability. That on Dec 30, three years later, we had a high wind warning and extreme fire danger was difficult for many. I noticed a lot of posts about difficulty sleeping on our community facebook page. My go bag was packed, my list of important items updated. Fortunately, there weren’t any fires in our area this time.

    January 7, 2025. Southern California is having a terrible time. At last count, there were 4 major blazes raging in and around Los Angeles. While I’ve lived in Colorado most of my life, I was born in Pasadena, both of my parents grew up in the area, and we visited often. So I feel more of a connection–I’ve been through fires, and now, looking at video, its triggering a bit, and I find that the former homes of both sets of grandparents are in evacuation areas. Close to home and a thousand miles away. On our community facebook page, a woman is asking for advice on navigating the post fire world for her brother, whose Santa Monica home has burned. Many survivors are generous with their experience and advice. These are difficult times, with more and more extreme weather, and fire season omnipresent. And still people help, reach out and support each other.

    I send all good wishes for peace and healing to all, and for calm skies and steady rain wherever needed.

    6 comments on After the Fire. Three Years Later

  • On Approaching Seventy

    January 8, 2025
    essays, retirement, Uncategorized
    On Approaching Seventy
    Daily writing prompt
    What are your thoughts on the concept of living a very long life?
    View all responses

    Who knew? As a child, I remember learning about centuries and millenia in school, imagining that if I lived long enough, I’d turn 45 in the year 2000. From a grade schooler’s perspective, that seemed quite an achievement.

    Fast forward a bit. The year 2000 was a quarter century ago, the feared Y2K wasn’t much of anything, and this year, barring an unexpected turn of events, I’ll turn seventy. On one level, so what? Seventy isn’t much different from 69. On another, my attention is aroused. I really can’t pretend that I’m the same age I’ve always been, a felt sense of 35 or 40, with a sense of infinite possibilities and a lot of time to explore the same.

    The infinite has become finite. To paraphrase Mary Oliver, what will I do with the rest of my wild and precious life? And perhaps more importantly, how shall I live these days. While nothing is guaranteed with a lifespan, there are many long lived individuals in my family. It seems that if one makes it to 60, there’s a high likelihood of reaching 90.

    I don’t know what is next, but I do know that I value quality of life much more than quantity, so living whatever remains of my life span with the best health, mental and physical I can manage is a priority. Sorting out a sustainable approach to this is my goal for this year. Stay tuned!

    15 comments on On Approaching Seventy

  • Huh?

    December 14, 2024
    cats, essays, funny stuff, Uncategorized
    Huh?

    I’m always learning something. This blurb appeared in my community newsletter I received today. I certainly understand about emotional support animals–I’ve had several cats, and they each have served in that way. But knit a chicken? And why not, if it works.

    And, in response to Martha’s RagTag Daily prompt of bestie, a great many of my besties have been beasties. There have been and are people on the bestie list–thanks, if you read this, do know how valued you are as a dear friend. But the cat persons, who live with me through thick and thin, and seem mostly unconditional in their love, affection and acceptance, they are my besties. Currently, Irene is the cat in charge. She’s great, even if one of her current goals seems to be getting me into a pretzel shape while sleeping and then watching me attempt to unwind/detangle in the middle of the night with a full bladder.

    Before Irene arrived in August, Ziggy was my bestie for close to 5 years. He was a dear, and I still miss him. Thanks to all my best cats. Snuggles all round and catnip, too!

    One of Z’s favorite poses
    The very alert Irene

    Live, knitted, or a plushie, we all need a bestie.

    7 comments on Huh?

  • JUMP!

    December 12, 2024
    Uncategorized
    JUMP!
    Daily writing prompt
    Have you ever performed on stage or given a speech?
    View all responses

    Yes.

    Oh, you want details? I got drafted to be in a play (Tom Stoppard’s Jumpers) in college because of my gymnastics skills. I and a friend, who was a much better tumbler than I, were the jumpers. It was fun, and very low pressure. Just going out and doing my bit. Much less pressure than performing a whole routine in front of judges.

    5 comments on JUMP!

  • Just Right for Boxing Day?

    December 7, 2024
    funny stuff

    The find of the day at Costco. A giggle is always welcome.

    2 comments on Just Right for Boxing Day?

  • No, Thank You

    October 25, 2024
    Uncategorized
    No, Thank You
    Daily writing prompt
    How much would you pay to go to the moon?
    View all responses

    I wouldn’t. While going to the moon might be interesting, its extraordinarily expensive and uses up a huge amount of resources. As my great-grandmother would say about her refusal to fly, “there’s plenty of things I haven’t seen down here on the ground”. I’m not afraid of flying, and there are all manner of things I’d like to see and experience during my remaining time here on this planet. I enjoy the moon and galaxies just fine from afar, and with the wondrous photos now available from space telescopes, I can enjoy the magic without having to put on my shoes!

    4 comments on No, Thank You

  • Some of Many

    October 22, 2024
    essays, Uncategorized
    Some of Many
    Daily writing prompt
    What major historical events do you remember?
    View all responses

    What major historical events do I remember? Too many, it feels like.

    Sitting in the elementary school cafeteria hearing that President Kennedy had been shot. A few years later, on the school bus, Bobby Kennedy and Martin Luther King also assassinated. The Watts riots, and being stunned when a neighbor condemned the rioters for “not knowing their place.”

    My father crying watching Winston Churchill’s funeral on our small black and white TV.

    Rockets going into space. Sputnik. Scott Carpenter–from my hometown, also one of the Mercury astronauts. Staying up late and getting up in the middle of the night to watch the moon landing and moon walk.

    The Vietnam War, Kent State shootings, Agnew, then Nixon, eventually resigning.

    So much violence and hatred, some excitement and exploration, and all of the above events occurred before I finished high school.

    As I ponder this, my pensive self is sad, noticing that the overall tenor of life on the planet has not improved over the subsequent half century. No wonder that I limit my intake of “news”. I want to function, be a part of the world, do what I can to bring peace and healing. I must control the dosage of horror so that I am not immobilized by grief.

    The tightrope of life, balancing between horror and hope. Time to attend to the small details of daily life, having gratitude for relative plenty and peace within my home, my writing interrupted by a cat needing her toy mouse thrown and a partner struggling to turn on the stove.

    A quote from Rainer Maria Rilke to close:

    • Let everything happen to you
    • Beauty and terror
    • Just keep going
    • No feeling is final

    in response to the wordpress and ragtag daily prompts for today

    9 comments on Some of Many

  • Quieter

    September 18, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Quieter
    Daily writing prompt
    What would your life be like without music?
    View all responses

    My life is more quiet than many. Background music or conversation is not my thing. If I have music on, its because I want to hear that music. If I’m reading, or thinking or talking with someone, the less background noise, the better.

    What kind of music? I love classical music, and Bach is my favorite. And there is classic rock and roll, whether Elvis or the Rolling Stones. And folk music, from the 60’s and 70’s. Good night, Irene is now sung to the cat most evenings.

    I believe my age is showing.

    2 comments on Quieter

  • Evening Plans

    September 10, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Evening Plans
    Daily writing prompt
    What are you doing this evening?
    View all responses

    Not watching the presidential debates. Its too hard on my nervous system to see what is very likely to be terrible behavior on the part of one of the participants (see yesterday’s post on narcissism) and its just not a good use of my time and energy. As Martha noted in today’s ragtag daily prompt of argument, true debate involves actual discussion of issues, a willingness to learn and listen. Its predicated upon an open mind, which is rare to see in one of these performances. Oh well.

    PBS will be broadcasting the debate, preempting our usual Tuesday evening fare of Finding Your Roots. So how will I spend the evening? After cooking, eating and cleaning up after dinner, my planned menu is shakshuka, we’ll probably read for a while, and then wind down watching my newly arrived British DVD of The Repair Shop. Series 10 arrived this week, and it’s the most recent available on DVD. Its fun, interesting, and there is no bluster, name calling or bs involved. Cheers!

    5 comments on Evening Plans

  • Great, Powerful and Incredibly Dangerous

    September 9, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Great, Powerful and Incredibly Dangerous
    Daily writing prompt
    What personality trait in people raises a red flag with you?
    View all responses

    Narcissism. For a narcissist, it’s all about them, squelching anything that doesn’t support their felt need to appear to be better than everyone and everything around them. The desperation that drives this leads to a disregard of others, and an estrangement of humanity and respect. So much damage is done by this, whether in homes, to their children and spouse or worldwide, as gaslit believers espouse and do things that under ordinary circumstances they wouldn’t have countenanced. Its a horrid misuse of power, corruption of a basic human need to love and belong.

    6 comments on Great, Powerful and Incredibly Dangerous

  • Times Past

    September 7, 2024
    ragtag daily prompt, The natural world, Uncategorized
    Times Past

    Today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt is postcard. Learning this, I opened the drawer next to my desk that contains cards. Most are greeting cards, for birthdays, anniversaries, deaths, get well wishes, all the sundry events of life. I find it useful to have a stash to hand, as many of these events arrive without warning, including birthdays of folks I’ve known all my life.

    Among the cards were 6 postcards, remnants of past travels and a time when they were a common purchase. All of mine were from coastal California, four from the San Diego Zoo and the others from the Monterey Bay Aquarium. The actual dates of acquisition are unknown, but I would estimate 20 years ago, with a wide error bar. I remember the jellyfish at the aquarium, backlit and floating up, down and around in an entrancing and hypnotic fashion. I spent many minutes enjoying their movements, and imagined that there would have been times in my misspent youth where I happily would have watched for hours–oh wow, man! All from times long past.

    Finding the cards also reminds me how much I love the ocean and exploring coastal areas. It is my best way of clearing out mental cobwebs, and I hope to find a way to visit the ocean again soon.

    No comments on Times Past

  • Whattsamatta?

    September 7, 2024
    essays, Uncategorized, whatsamatta
    Whattsamatta?

    Today’s (July 17,2023) ragtag daily prompt is dementia. Interesting and pertinent word. Its the main reason I have been blogging only rarely. No, I don’t have dementia, but my partner, BA, hovers on the border of MCI (mild cognitive impairment) and dementia. On her good days, she’s pretty functional, and on the not so good ones, things can be dicey. This has been going on for more than five years now, and as her primary ailment is vascular (blood vessel), with lots of teeny micro strokes, sometimes events are noticed, and other times only in retrospect is the change seen.

    We did visit the neurologist in January 2024, and she used the term white matter disease, as the MRI shows lots of changes in the white matter in her brain, with the radiologist saying “severe microvascular disease”. Doesn’t really matter what its called, there isn’t much to be done other than to try to prevent more problems from developing. One of the very challenging things about living with someone with brain difficulties is the variation in memory and capacity. One day, a month or so after the visit with the neurologist, BA was interested in talking about it. I told her that the doc had called it “white matter disease” and she immediately segued to whatsamatta disease, which I find both humorous and apt.

    During the day to day events of our life, confusion isn’t a huge component of what’s going on, unless it involves something linear and sequential, like directions, recipes, or computer instructions. By and large, I’ve had to take over most of these tasks, doing all the cooking. BA can make a simple meal, like toast and something out of the refrigerator. More complicated stuff is up to me. On difficult days, sorting out the washing machine or microwave operations may need assistance. It’s a really good day if she can get on her online credit union account.

    I imagine my Whatsamatta postings to be intermittent commentaries on my life as the partner of someone who has a lot of struggles due to brain disease. Sometimes I am sure it will sound like I am whining and venting, and I’m not even the person whose brain is sick. That’s true, and while most aspects of BA’s day to day life are impacted, so are mine. I never quite know what to expect from day to day and moment to moment.

    The spiritual teachers all remind us to be present now, in this moment, and living with Whatsamatta certainly confirms that the only moment is now, and at the same time, as partner and semi-caretaker, there’s the ongoing challenge of paying attention and anticipating and being aware of the whatever the next challenge may be, however large or small.

    Written in response to two RDP, confusion (today) and dementia (July 23).

    ????
    2 comments on Whattsamatta?

  • Where am I? What Time is It?

    September 3, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Where am I? What Time is It?
    Daily writing prompt
    Share a story about the furthest you’ve ever traveled from home.
    View all responses

    I had to check distances, and interestingly, it turns out that Denver to Delhi, India lists at 7701miles, and Denver to Queenstown, New Zealand is 7919miles. I’ve been to both, and enjoyed both locations. It took longer to get to Delhi, and the time change is 11.5 or 12.5 hours, depending on whether its daylight savings or not here in Colorado. I had the worst jet lag I’ve ever experienced after that trip. It took me the greater part of a month to get my brain and body reacclimated. New Zealand is 18 hours ahead of Denver, or Denver is 6 hours behind. My jet lag was minor.

    I’d be happy to return to either, although I have a few distant venues on my list that I’d prefer to visit first. Antarctica wins for distance, at 9184 miles. I’m ready to go, anyone interested?

    8 comments on Where am I? What Time is It?

  • Breathing Space

    September 1, 2024
    Haiku, etc, The natural world, Uncategorized
    Breathing Space

    Daily writing prompt
    What brings a tear of joy to your eye?
    View all responses

    open fields, big sky

    rusty remnants of times past

    barbed wire warnings

    The view out my front door today

    free open spaces

    weather driven existence

    wild creatures and skies

    Photo by Philippe Donn on Pexels.com

    unscheduled time

    potential and possible

    space to breathe think feel

    maybe an alpine lily

    written in response to today’s ragtag daily prompt of barbed wire

    and the daily writing prompt

    5 comments on Breathing Space

  • HMMMMMM. . .

    August 31, 2024
    Uncategorized
    HMMMMMM. . .
    Daily writing prompt
    Why do you blog?
    View all responses

    I’m really not sure why I blog at the moment, and looking back through my site, the reasons why I blog/write now are not the same as when I began. I care less about odd word usage, I still enjoy bizarre signs but rarely document them, I’m done triathaloning for the time being (aging joints), the van is sold, etc, etc.

    And yet the blog stays up. I have more to do with writing, although the format is yet to be determined. Playing with writing via blogging may prove helpful as I find my way living a life in retirement very different from what I had imagined/dreamt of/planned for.

    So I write, or think about writing. Adjusting to new circumstances makes it challenging. And that is true and inevitable for life in general. Once again, I catch myself arguing with what is. Maybe that’s why I write, to discover more about myself.

    5 comments on HMMMMMM. . .

  • Favorite?

    August 24, 2024
    essays, Uncategorized
    Favorite?
    Daily writing prompt
    What’s your favorite recipe?
    View all responses

    It depends on the day. This summer, I’ve made a lot of frozen yogurt. I started with an americas test kitchen recipe, and have since modified it. Yogurt strained. A little sugar, pinch of salt, either gelatin or agar softened in the whey from the strained yogurt. Some pureed organic peaches, some freeze dried raspberries (ground in a spice blender and then sieved to remove the seeds). Blend it all together, chill, and then churn. Yummy treat in the summer.

    Last night, I made another favorite, kung pao chicken. Not like the restaurant variety. Much more flavorful, and including szechuan peppercorns. Tonight, I’ll make a summer succotash, using the bounty of summer: corn, squash, green beans, limas, peppers, onions chiles and some fresh herbs. My favorite depends on the season and what’s for dinner!

    Today, as I shopped our weekly farmers market, I was amazed by the variety of beautifully fresh produce available. I wasn’t the only one, as a toddler created a landslide of veg as she grabbed for the onion that had caught her eye. No harm done, and those of us nearby helped reassemble the pile

    7 comments on Favorite?

  • Senses

    August 9, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Senses
    Daily writing prompt
    What is the most important thing to carry with you all the time?
    View all responses

    A sense of humor, of perspective, of myself and others. What is really going on here? What do I need to know? What do I feel? Is an action required? Curiosity.

    No comments on Senses

  • Hello and Welcome!

    August 8, 2024
    cats, essays, Uncategorized
    Hello and Welcome!

    One week ago, it was time. Ziggy had passed in May, we traveled in June, and had various activities going on in house in July, from colonoscopy preps to having all the windows washed. Not an opportune time to introduce a new cat to the household.

    Enter August. We’ve had three months time to grieve Ziggy, take care of business, and live in a too empty cat free home. During this time, I’ve been paying attention to listings at the humane society and cat rescues, and had instructed the spirits of past cats to work on finding the next cat. No one had shown up, online, in ads, or at the back door.

    Until August 1. A striking cat appeared on the Longmont Humane Society website. Her green eyes seemed to stare at me. I showed her picture to BA, and we agreed to pay a visit. No, we didn’t come home with that cat, she turned out to have health issues and other quirks that wouldn’t make her a good fit. But we did find Irene. She’s seven years old, dark grey and white, and had been at the shelter for more than a month. Aside from missing about a third of her teeth, she’s healthy.

    On meeting her, she was careful but not overly fearful and explored the room, and sniffed at BA and I, and tolerated a few pets. Paperwork was done, fees paid, and we loaded her into her carrier and off we went to her new home. Once home, she spent the next several hours touring, exploring every corner several times, carefully checking and rechecking all over the house. After several hours of this, she settled under a bed for a nap. Good cat.

    Irene has settled in well. She’s active, chasing her woolen “mouse” all around the house. It was on my pillow when I awoke this morning. She likes to eat, perhaps too much, and she mews quietly when she needs something. She often hangs out near us, and makes plenty of time for her naps. Welcome, we are so glad you’re here!

    About her name. Irene was given to her at the shelter. That is likely to change, as BA has a hard time remembering it, and it does seem a bit lackluster, not really suiting this cat. We haven’t yet found “the name”, but I hope it will be soon. Meanwhile, she’s Irene, Sweetpea, Little one, and all manner of endearments. This morning, I caught myself humming “Good Night, Irene” as she was asking for breakfast.

    Apparently, today is International Cat Day, so it seems most appropriate for this childless cat lady to introduce the newest family member to the world.

    Irene, enjoying her new cat tree, which lets her supervise in our sitting room, or inspect backyard activities.

    14 comments on Hello and Welcome!

  • Another Goodbye

    August 7, 2024
    cats, Uncategorized
    Another Goodbye

    Not so old cat Ziggy left us at the beginning of May. His kidneys decided to fail very rapidly, and over the course of a week, he went from being a little droopy to extremely weak and unlikely to recover. He was 15, a good age for a cat, but as our previous cats had gone to 19 or 20, it was very surprising. I was expecting several more years and was hit quite hard by intense grief, hence the delayed posting.

    Zig was my buddy, snuggling close with me at night, affectionate and unconditional in his loving presence. As BA, my partner, struggles with vascular brain disease and has many needs and variable availability, Zig was consistent in his lovely Zigginess. Until he wasn’t.

    We adopted Ziggy at age 10, his third home, and while I fully expected ours to be his forever home, I wasn’t expecting forever to be as brief as it was. A wonderful time you gave us, Zig, and while we miss you still, I am so grateful for your presence in our lives for as long as you were there. Thanks, little cat man. I smile when I think of you and every time I look at my phone!

    5 comments on Another Goodbye

  • Typical?

    July 29, 2024
    essays
    Typical?
    Daily writing prompt
    Was today typical?
    View all responses

    What’s a typical day? Since I retired two years ago, the routine of work and non work days has altered. Having a partner with neurologic impairments affecting both cognition and balance also adds to the atypia of my days. I can and do make plans, and then often adjust to circumstances.

    Today started out in the usual fashion, drinking coffee, perusing the news online, playing a few games to order my brain. And then the lights went out, quite literally. A power outage. Three hours later, the power has been restored. Huge sigh of relief. We’re on track for record breaking heat today, so no power would mean no heat pump working, so no cooling of the house, and even more significantly, a freezer and fridge without power.

    Our area of town is notorious for poor cellphone coverage, and it was less good this morning. So I meandered out, having manually opened the garage (I am grateful for good general physical health and strength) looking for an open venue with wifi. I ended at McDonald’s enjoying an iced tea and wifi. I found an email from Xcel, estimating power restoration around 10:15, and noting that if it was going to be more than an hour off from that, I’d get another email. Phew! No need to go further down the crisis response plan that I’ve honed since the catastrophic Marshall Fire 2.5 years ago.

    Extreme weather events, wildfires, power outages, variable brain function in my partner. If you had asked me if any of these things were typical 5 years ago, I would have answered no. My response now is different. While change may indeed be the only constant, these changes are indeed challenging. Oh well.

    1 comment on Typical?

  • Ring Time in Paris

    July 28, 2024
    essays
    Ring Time in Paris

    Once again, the Olympic games are on. Some years back, the powers that be (TV or Olympic organizers, I don’t know) decided that rather than having the summer and winter games in the same year, happening every 4th year, they would move the winter Olympics, so they now happen 2 years off from the summer games. So if it’s an even numbered year, there will be an olympic games, and if it’s an odd year, it’s get ready time.

    I’ve long enjoyed sports, in particular the individual ones such as swimming, diving, skiing, skating, gymnastics and track and field. I’ve enjoyed doing them, and at times, watching them. As a child, I remember watching the games on our small black and white TV, and for just a few hours when they were on. Now, there are so many channels, broadcast and streamed, it feels both over and underwhelming. Overwhelm by the sheer volume, underwhelm by the commercials dominating broadcasts and the cults of personality and nationalism eclipsing the fact that everyone participating is a phenomenal athlete, even if they finish last in their event.

    As time has gone by, I have suffered from over saturation and media fatigue and am less and less tolerant of pageantry and hype. Friday, I was having my teeth cleaned and I received a text from a friend reminding me that the opening ceremonies were being broadcast. I opened wider for the dental hygienist and went on with my day. In some ways it feels odd to care so little about something I was once passionate about, and in other ways, it feels like growth. And maybe, I’m just a grumpy older person.

    But I’m not grumpy, and I do salute all the athletes and their perseverance and determination to do their best, whatever that may be. Enjoy your games!

    Written in response to todays Ragtag daily prompt of Olympics

    12 comments on Ring Time in Paris

  • Comfort?

    July 20, 2024
    Uncategorized
    Comfort?
    Daily writing prompt
    What’s your go-to comfort food?
    View all responses

    My go to comfort food?

    It really does depend on the day. Ice cream is a favorite, as is pizza, if I’m in a savory mood. And if I’m feeling poorly, a brothy soup will do the trick, as will scrambled eggs and toast, particularly rye toast.

    Pondering further, I recognize that pizza and ice cream are celebratory foods, while the soup, eggs and toast offer physical comfort and a sense of nurturance. Add in here good asian foods, particularly those with noodles–pad thai or pho. Category three, emotional support foods, are most often sought when I’m feeling sad, angry or frustrated. Sweets come up here, and this immediately becomes frustrating, as I’m a bit of a snob. Poorly made or poor quality items add to my irritation. A good crispy cookie is nice, as is a flavorful, spicy, but not too sweet cake–think plain gingerbread, bara brith, lemon or pistachio loaf. My favorites tend to be those I bake myself.

    This summer, I found a recipe for frozen yogurt that I like (thanks, America’s test kitchen). The original is ginger, and is good. Since that first batch, I’ve made lemon, raspberry, and peach among other flavors. Its tasty, less sweet and fat than ice cream, and we’ve been enjoying an evening scoop as part of the pre-bed wind down. Fine summer comfort!

    6 comments on Comfort?

  • V is for Vigilant

    April 26, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, cats, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    V is for Vigilant

    Ziggy, like most cats, is a vigilant fellow. He keeps track of what’s going on in the house and if anything is suspicious, he carefully investigates. When he’s ready, that is. As I’ve written recently, I’ve been moving a lot of things around in our upstairs, shifting my desk, bookcases and assorted ephemera from the guest room to the now open spaces of our former bedroom. I moved much of the furniture last week and this week have been reorganizing and sorting through all the stuff from my old professional office as well as the stuff that’s accumulated in my home office over the last 35 years. As noted, its a tiresome process, and it is slowly getting done.

    Yesterday morning, I woke up quite early so was sitting upstairs reading and drinking coffee. Ziggy followed me, and after he was done with his morning cuddle and scratches, he proceeded to very carefully sniff at the bookcases and the notebooks and papers stacked on the floor. It was interesting watch him sniff around, and also a bit surprising, as the guest room where they had previously resided also holds the big armchair in which Ziggy spends most of his daytime hours, cocooned in a fleece throw and getting his beauty rest.

    This afternoon, I unpacked the new copier/printer/scanner that is replacing the antiquated (meaning I can no longer update software) combo device as well as my perfectly serviceable old printer that only prints. Zig left the room when I was pulling out the squeaky styrofoam enclosed printer, but once the box was on the floor and I quit making “bad” noises, he very carefully inspected the box. That’s unusual for him, as unlike most cats of my acquaintance, he usually ignores boxes and bags. But with this project, and near his territory, he was checking it out. A fellow can’t be too careful.

    The new device is set up and working, I’ve found a couple of options for places who will likely be happy to have donation of our old devices that still work, and Ziggy has gone back to his sleeping bag to catch up on his rest.

    Written for today’s Ragtag daily prompt of cocoon and the April A to Z Blogging Challenge: V

    10 comments on V is for Vigilant

  • U is for Undone

    April 25, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, Uncategorized
    U is for Undone

    As I wrote about yesterday, I’m working on the reset of the upstairs space of our house. I’ve moved my desk and bookcases, and the guest room is tidied, ready for next weeks guest. Is all my clobber sorted and put or given away? No.

    Is more done today than was done yesterday? Yes.

    Did I do some paperwork tasks that needed to be done? Yes.

    Am I enjoying this project? No, but I do appreciate the results.

    Are any of these items to be completed on my bucket list? Not a chance. If I die overnight, I won’t be relieved that I finished these jobs, although I will send condolences from the other side to whoever will have clean up duty.

    Have I sorted the shelving unit that has a lot of BA’s stuff on it, including the never used sewing machine and 3 out of date printers? No. That’s undone. Hopefully I’ll make a start on it tomorrow, and BA will be in a position to be amenable to making some decisions about things. Its a day to day thing.

    I suppose that the clearing and cleaning of items from one’s home is always somewhat undone as long as one continues to live there. Not unlike laundry. Unless you do it naked, there will be dirty clothes ready just as soon as you finish the last load. Oh well.

    Written for the ragtag daily prompt of bucket list and the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge: U

    4 comments on U is for Undone

  • T is for Tiresome

    April 24, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays, living, Uncategorized
    T is for Tiresome

    I’m working on some tiresome projects. A year ago, I cleared out the office I had seen clients in for the past 20 years. I left much of the furniture for the next occupant (with their permission), but I had some containers full of the usual desk miscellany as well as client records. I sorted through and stored the records and I just stuck the bags and boxes of office supplies, etc. on the floor of a closet for later. Later has arrived.

    Back in December, BA had some health issues which prompted moving the main bedroom downstairs. That happened fairly quickly, with some of the weaving supplies in the new bedroom to be donated, and others stored, primarily in the upstairs “guest” bedroom, aka my home office or in the garage. With the bed out of the main bedroom, possible new uses of the space arise. My clothes have remained upstairs and I continue to use the attached bathroom. Relocating my desk and books into this room makes sense, leaving more space for storing weaving stuff, and making it easier for me to use my desk when we have guests. BA is very close to one of her sisters in law, and she’s visiting next week. Time to get a move on, literally.

    So last week I moved my desk and bookcases and all that stuff down the hall. I cleaned my old work stuff out of the guest closet, and was able to stow the weaving gear in that closet. The guest room now looks like a guest room (its also where Ziggy spends his days curled up in his private chair getting his daily 20 (hours of rest). I have a decent arrangement now of my desk other furniture in its new location. Now I’m on to the tiresome stuff, sorting through office supplies, figuring out what to store where, and what can be moved on. Pens, pencils, scissors, paper clips and more paper clips, notepads, half-used notebooks, now empty file folders. Stuff. Highlighters and colored pencils.

    What stays, what goes, and if it goes, where? All these questions for all these little things. The challenge of dealing with items that are useful, if partially used, and deciding what’s enough for here, and what I realistically will or will not use. Tiresome is the word. Sorting and resorting of stuff. And oh yes, I have more stuff from when I cleaned out my Dad’s desk nearly 3 years ago. Part of me wants to bin it all, and the rest of me is being encouraged to hang in there and do the project well and responsibly, minimizing waste. My temper is not the best during this sort of project. Carrying so many possibilities in my head, I tend to get irritable and impatient with any interruptions. It’s challenging to keep a sense of humor and perspective.

    So I take breaks and write blog posts, do all manner of other chores, play a game on my phone, go for a walk, etc, etc. During my school years, when I had a paper to write or exam to study for, I’d clean my desk in preparation or procrastination. Now it’s the other way round. Instead of cleaning my desk, I write. And like all those long ago projects, this one will get done soon enough. Below, the new office in progress and the “sorting sink”

    Written for the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge: T and the ragtag daily prompt of temper

    9 comments on T is for Tiresome

  • S is For Snow

    April 22, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    S is For Snow

    April 22, 2023. Its grey and snowing lightly. We got about 2 inches overnight. Most unpaved surfaces are covered with snow, although the roads and walks are clear, having held heat from previous days. It’s not unusual for us to get snow in April, in fact the only months I recall without snow in my part of Colorado are June, July, and August.

    That said, we’ve had a warm and dry stretch, with record high temperatures in March and April, so the contrast with cold and snowy is more noticeable. Many of us, myself included, were used it being warm and classically springlike, despite spring snow being very classic around here. I don’t yearn for the hot and dry, we’ve had too many fires, so I’ll quote our usual refrain of we do need the moisture. There’s plenty of time for heat. Cool and wet is good.

    The view out my front door today

    I’m relieved that most of my flowering plants and the apple tree haven’t yet budded out, so they are unlikely to be damaged by the cold weather. I’m also glad I don’t have tickets for the local university’s spring football game today. I noticed a lot of tickets to the sold out event now for sale.

    Me, I think I’ll mostly stay in, maybe make some soup and then go out for a walk. Happy Spring!

    Written in response to the Ragtag daily prompts of surface and yearn and the Blogging from A to Z April challenge: S. I know I’ve skipped Q and R, I’ll get back to them one of these days.

    5 comments on S is For Snow

  • Peas, Please

    April 20, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, Uncategorized
    Peas, Please

    Like many things in my life these days, gardening is undergoing reconsideration. I’ve had a vegetable garden every year since I moved into this house in 1987. I have enjoyed the fruits and vegetables of my labors, and still look forward to delicious home grown organic produce.

    However, like a lot of routines, I’m pretty tired of it after all these years. There was a time when hitting the garden after a long day of seeing patients was a fine antidote to the day. Now it feels more like an obligation. That said, I have started some seeds under lights in the basement. Heirloom tomatoes, tomatillos and chiles. When its warm enough, they’ll have a head start.

    Other, cool weather vegetables get direct seeded into the garden beds. Ordinarily, my peas, radishes and early greens would have been planted several weeks ago. The seed packets are still sitting on the dining room table, awaiting the soil. Weather as well as other obligations and reduced interest are all components of the delay. So are the rabbits. The last two years, some of the neighborhood rabbits have shown that they like pea shoots and sugar snap peas as much as I do. The idea of this crop being eaten before I harvest them is discouraging. Last year, I planted radishes on either side of the sugar snap peas and the bunnies left them mostly alone. Until the peas got taller than the radishes.

    We’ll see what I do. I do love fresh from the garden sugar snap peas. Maybe I’ll get ambitious and get them in this week.

    Written for the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge: P

    8 comments on Peas, Please

  • O is for Oh-oh

    April 19, 2023
    Uncategorized
    O is for Oh-oh

    My local zip code starts with 800. So the community facebook groups all have oh oh in part of their title. I’m not a particular fan of FB, and I do find it useful for connecting either with people scattered around the world, or for communicating within our community. Very helpful for finding resources for local services, from home repair and cleaning, yard work, and finding out about new businesses and such. Following the Marshall Fire, it was also very useful for coordinating donations and accessing resources. So it definitely has its uses.

    Like many such groups, it can get caught up in minutiae, and posters can be thrown out of the group for disobeying rules around civility, etc. I try and stay out of such matters, and remain respectful, as challenging as it may be at times. I can definitely get flippant or snarky if irritated. I don’t want my involvement with the oh oh to change to an uh oh.

    Written for today’s ragtag daily prompt of flippant, and the Blogging from A to Z challenge: O.

    Apologies to all for this minimally creative post. Sometimes it is just about showing up, and one’s best is not so hot. Hasta mañana.

    8 comments on O is for Oh-oh

  • N is for Nothing

    April 18, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays
    N is for Nothing

    Nothing big on the schedule. Day to day stuff, small events and activities. It will likely remain this way, given BA’s health challenges. We may make a visit to her family in Madison this summer, and her sister in law is coming for a visit in two weeks, but that’s about it

    I think I’m feeling it more than usual, as our original travel plans had us heading to Australia last week, traveling with a group we’ve traveled with before, seeing a solar eclipse, and some of Australia, which has been on my to see list since I found out about the Great Barrier Reef as a schoolgirl. So things remain on my list. After the challenges of Iceland last summer, when it became clear that BA’s limitations are increasing, I’ve let go of travel plans for the duration. Modest road trips, adjusted for how things are now. Most of the time, I’m in a pretty accepting place about this, and other times, like now, I struggle. Not being able to do significant trips has me realizing how very much I’d been planning/wanting/needing to do this in my life. And now the circumstances are different.

    Happens a lot, I’m told. For all manner of reasons. I’m fortunate, I have resources, a comfortable home, good health, enough on most levels. And its still painful, this agenda empty of what I am realizing has been a lifelong goal, often subjugated to school and work, career, all those things. I have traveled along the way, more than many, and now, I wish I’d done more of it. Perhaps later. Meanwhile, I do stuff here, and I am making a series of lists of travel wishes/goals/longing. Three categories: 1. Relatively close shorter trips, things I might be able to do with backup care for BA. 2. Longer road trips throughout north America, including Alaska. 3. World travel, all manner of places to see. I definitely can imagine being gone for months to years at a time. For now, I contemplate, hope, and water the plants to go in the garden when the time comes.

    Written for the Blogging from A to Z Challenge: N and today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt of nothing

    10 comments on N is for Nothing

  • M is For Mergansers, Mallards and Meadowlarks

    April 16, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    M is For Mergansers, Mallards and Meadowlarks

    BA and I walked down to the little fishing pond today. Its cool and breezy and sunny, welcome after yesterday’s rain and snow. On the pond, there were a few geese, a turtle taking the sun on the mini island, and ducks, both mallards and mergansers. The mallard pair I saw were staying close to shore, dabbling and turning over for snacks. The mergansers, on the other hand were grouped mid pond and diving down in search of their meals. It being mating season, the drakes had on their fancy suits, and this is one time I regret not having a camera other than on my phone.

    Walking back home, our route took us through a field, where a meadowlark was singing away. Their song is one of my favorites, so evocative of spring and summer. In the photos below, I took the one of the mallards, one up, one down, and the more skilled photos of the meadowlark and merganser were taken by others. Happy spring!

    Photo by Skyler Ewing on Pexels.com

    I am happy to have what is basically a strong healthy body that is able to do most of what I want to do. However, I’m just not built to fly. The wrong muscles and no wings. Oh well, I will continue to admire those who do fly.

    Written for the April Blogging From A to Z Challenge: M and today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt of muscle.

    5 comments on M is For Mergansers, Mallards and Meadowlarks

  • L is for Light

    April 15, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    L is for Light

    Light. It’s essential to our lives. Without the light and heat of the sun, we wouldn’t be here on this planet. Plants convert light, air and water to food, animals eat plants and each other, and so on. One way or another, we are all attuned to light, gathering information about our world. Light from the sun, other stars at night, artificially generated light indoors, the light of a fire. All of these things give us information.

    When I was heading from Colorado to Minnesota for college, a number of people warned me about the cold. I don’t particularly mind cold weather, so I wasn’t worried. What I hadn’t considered was the reduced light. Not only shorter day lengths, being farther north, but the cloud cover so prominent in a midwestern winter. I would get grumpy when it had been grey for long periods of time. Not the depression that affects many with SAD (seasonal affective disorder), but certainly cranky and irritable.

    I’ve wondered how it would be to live in polar region through a winter, where there was no sunlight for some months. The wonders of the aurora notwithstanding, I suspect I would struggle. I probably won’t find out in this lifetime, but the curiosity remains.

    Yesterday was cold and grey, with rain and snow though the day. I noticed that my ambition was less, certainly anything done outside took a little more consideration, preparing for the conditions. Today, it’s still cold, there’s a bit of snow left on the ground this morning, but the sky is blue and the sun out. This far into spring, the sun is quite high in the sky and there’s a curious brightness in a spring snowy morning compared with a December or January winter’s morning.

    And then there is greening grass under the snow, along with snowcapped spring flowers. It is an interesting and somewhat magical time. I do enjoy the light.

    Sunrise

    Written for the ragtag daily prompt of cold and the Blogging from A to Z Challenge: L

    11 comments on L is for Light

  • Killed or Not dead Yet?

    April 13, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays, marshall fire, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    Killed or Not dead Yet?

    With apologies to Monty Python for the title.

    Walking through my nearby arboretum, I noticed a a small backhoe parked along a trail. Once I reached it, it was clear a tree had been dug out, and there were piles of branches nearby, along with this sign:

    The fire passed through this area, burning most of the homes along the south edge of the arboretum. Some trees were obviously destroyed at the time of the fire, and for others, the extent of their injury is less clear, so as this note from the city forester states, they’ve been following the trees and their progress or lack thereof. Some tees are gone, others are trimmed, and I imagine that this process may continue for a while. All the trees I noticed work on today are evergreens. For the deciduous trees, some of these decisions will have to wait until leafing out is well underway. This really underscores the process nature of fire recovery. It’s not only rebuilding homes that takes time, but we are still learning what is damaged beyond recovery and what is not.

    While trees being harshly trimmed or removed is not particularly an upbeat topic, that healing is continuing from this devastating fire is upbeat, if bittersweet. Nature is demonstrating resilience, recovery and regrowth despite the losses. More lessons for me.

    Written for today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt of Upbeat and the Blogging from A to Z Challenge: K

    8 comments on Killed or Not dead Yet?

  • I is for Indigo

    April 11, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, Uncategorized
    I is for Indigo

    Why? I love the color. Blues are my favorite colors, although I like all of them. But the gorgeous deep blue of indigo, the color of the sea or sky at evening, flowers that seem to shine and glow, there’s a magic there. And on feathers, once again I find delight.

    The lighthouse near Presque Isle Park
    Monday
    Image from Pixabay, thank you!
    Photo by Hal Moran on Pexels.com

    Written for blogging from A to Z April Challenge: I

    2 comments on I is for Indigo

  • H is for hurry

    April 10, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, Uncategorized
    H is for hurry

    As I wrote in G is for garage, I have a new car occupying my garage, and my plan was to donate my old car, a 2006 Honda Civic. While 17 years old, it’s been a very reliable car, and despite a few external dings, its really in excellent shape. Were it not for the opportunity to have a plug in hybrid, I’d still be driving old blue.

    However, I now have the hybrid, and keeping two cars (in addition to BA’s car) seems a bit much. So, as planned, yesterday I filled out the form on Colorado Public Radio’s website to donate my car. At 9am today, the phone rang, confirming my intent to donate and walking me through signing the title appropriately. The woman who called told me I should hear from the towing company within 24-48 hours.

    A few hours later, the towing company called, and we set things up for tomorrow morning. An hour or so later, while I was heading to run a few errands, the towing company called again. They had just had a cancellation, the driver was one town over, could they pick up my car now? I turned back towards home, hastily began removing the license plates, and I was doing so, the tow truck arrived. Five minutes later, Blue was on its way to auction. On the radio, when they talk about this process, people often comment how easy it is, “like falling off a log”. They weren’t kidding.

    This all happened in a hurry and I’m a little stunned. This is the first time I’ve gotten rid of a car before it was having serious problems, and having traveled together for 17 years, I’m a bit melancholy over my decision.The deal is done, I’ll be fine, I hope Blue gets a good home, and I have what I hope will be a fine vehicle for the next several years of my life. I can tell its going to take a while to catch up with these events. Thanks, Blue, its been a good run!

    Written for the Blogging from A to Z April Challenge and today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt of Log

    7 comments on H is for hurry

  • G is For Garage

    April 9, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, Uncategorized
    G is For Garage

    Not a very glamorous subject, garages. I got my first car following graduation from college. Until I bought the house I currently live in 10 years later, I didn’t have a garage, and parked wherever I could find a place on the street. Nine of those years were in Chicago, a city well known for its crummy winter weather. I got good at shoveling out parking spaces, only to return from the laundromat or supermarket to find the space claimed by another. And then having to clear windshields, etc before being able to go anywhere was also a challenge. My first years there, it was less of an issue, as I lived close to work and walked, and then when I started medschool, I was able to carpool for the first two years. After that, I needed to be at the hospital at all hours, so I cleared off my car at all hours.

    I didn’t think much about this then, it was just how it was, and how life functioned at the time. After my return to Colorado, I first had a parking space near the condo I rented, and after about a year there, I bought the house I’ve lived in for the past 35 years. My folks gave me a garage door opener as a housewarming present. Wow! What luxury to walk out of my house, into a garage housing a dry car, push the button and off I go. Very handy for those middle of the night calls during my practice years. I’ve really appreciated having a garage and the protection it affords my car and the convenience afforded me.

    In my neighborhood, all the homes were built with attached 2 car garages. Many families keep one car in the garage and use the other side for storage. Some folks keep their cars out and their stuff in. And if you have a large suv or truck, they don’t fit in the garage anyway. At our house, we keep both cars in the garage, along with a bike, a trike, shovels, tools and rakes. Its fairly organized as such things go, and no matter what, its a garage and it gets dirty, particularly in winter with snowy and icy cars pulling in. One of these days, I’ll give it its semi annual clean.

    This week, a big change happened in the garage. It got a new resident car. After driving my Honda Civic for 17 years, I got a plug in hybrid, a Toyota Rav 4 prime. Why? One is the increased all electric range of better than 30 miles per charge, meaning that most of my errands and running around town can be done without using any gas. And even if I need to use gas, the mileage of the Rav 4 (estimated at 38 mpg) is better than I get with my civic, 30-33 depending on conditions. In addition, I’ll have better hauling capacity with the larger vehicle and all wheel drive, which is handy around here. I’ve been looking for a plug in hybrid for the greater part of the past year, and finally this opportunity arrived.

    It’s exciting having a new car and learning about the electric options, charging, and all that fun stuff. It’s also a bit anxiety producing, being big and new and shiny. It’s been many years since my old Civic got its first dings, and now the aging process begins anew. What will happen to old blue? I won’t bury it in the backyard, I’m going to donate it to Colorado Public Radio. Things change, and blue is passing the baton to white. I’m happy to have this new vehicle and look forward to many years of having it residing in my garage. Another baby step away from fossil fuels for me.

    Written for the Blogging from A to Z challenge: G and the Ragtag Daily Prompt of Bury

    3 comments on G is For Garage

  • F is for Fun

    April 7, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays, Uncategorized
    F is for Fun

    I’ve long enjoyed athletic activities, whether hiking or swimming, bicycling, skiing, gymnastics or skating. As you might surmise from this list, I’m more of an individual rather than a team/ball sports person. I think some of that is due to the fact that I’m an introvert, and some due to it sometimes being difficult to round up teams for matches, etc. As I kid, I could get on my bike and head out or just go to the city pool to swim. When I was growing up, there were many fewer organized sports, and even fewer for girls. Doing stuff on my own was the best way to be active.

    I’ve long had an affinity for activities that challenged one individually, and involved form and athleticism as opposed to sheer speed. Some of that is related to not being particularly quick at running. I suspect all my muscle fibers are “slow twitch”. I’m built for endurance, not speed. And then it just seemed fun to tumble, doing cartwheels, headstands, flips. So diving and gymnastics were fun for me. Again, I’m not brilliant at them, but I am persistent, so I learned. Repetition after repetition after repetition.

    Gymnastics was a favorite sport of mine during high school through grad school. I found a group of friends there, and working out, challenging myself physically was fun and was an excellent antidote to all the intellectual activity and study of medical school. Finishing my first year of med school, I noticed that there was no celebration or acknowledgement of the event scheduled, either officially or socially. So I made my own. After turning in my final exam paper, I turned upside down and walked out of the lecture hall on my hands. A little something to celebrate.

    At this point in my life, I don’t do gymnastics anymore, but I still have decent core strength and flexibility, and can do headstands and rolls. I haven’t tried a handstand in a while, but last I did, I could do them against the wall. It’s still fun to turn upside down. There’s a sense of body ownership and semi mastery that feels good to meet physical challenge.

    I took up figure skating in 2001. Like gymnastics, it has that combination of skill and risk, as well as a bit of a performance aspect. It’s fun. I haven’t skated since the pandemic began, and I had cut back owing to some back issues before that, but I toy with the idea of returning. Moving along the ice, gliding has a magic of its own, and while I’m not much inclined to do jumps anymore, I imagine myself doing some spins.

    Not surprisingly, watching olympic sports has largely followed my interests. Individual more that group sports. I’ve never enjoyed the sports that involve causing harm to another, particularly boxing and to a lesser extent, wrestling. I just seems wrong to me. As more as emerged about the damage done to young athletes in the pursuit of ever more extreme athleticism as well as abuse by coaches, I’ve found my interest waning. Yes, excellence in any endeavor can be impressive and amazing to watch, but the cost in lives and physical and psychological damage is too much. Wiser voices are needed to counteract the bizarre notion that only winners matter.

    Sports for fun, challenging oneself, fine. Only for prizes, with only winning counting. That’s sick, in my opinion.

    Written in response to today’s Word Press prompt, the ragtag daily prompt of wise, and the Blogging from A to Z challenge. Today’s letter being F.

    8 comments on F is for Fun

  • E is for Electric

    April 6, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays, Uncategorized
    E is for Electric

    I’ve been in the process of looking into “electrifying” my home. It’s part of the process of moving away from a dependence on fossil fuels, and increasing the efficiency of power requiring appliances.

    I’ve been following heat pump development for years (thanks, This Old House) and finally, the above ground versions have become quite functional in very cold weather, making such a thing feasible in my climate. It’s no longer on the cusp, the heat pumps can work without a backup heat source. People in my area who have heat pumps did fine during our very cold (-15F, -28C) weather in December and January. Another reason I’m looking now is the move of the main bedroom to the main floor of our home. I’ve not had air conditioning, but have cooled with an evaporative cooler since I’ve owned my home. Our former bedroom was right next to the cooler input, and with a few windows cracked open, one could sleep comfortably. With water shortages becoming more prevalent here in the west, I’m also thinking differently about using water for evaporative cooling.

    With the downstairs bedroom father from the cold air inlet, it remains possible to cool with the swamp cooler, but it will be less efficient. In addition, the new bedroom space started its life holding a hot tub, so there are a lot of windows, which although low-E and double paned, still allows a lot of solar heat gain through both the south and west exposures. Even now, in early spring, that room warms up a lot on sunny days. In the summer, it’s going to be toasty. So, I’m looking at heat pumps. They work by exchanging cool for warm air, and can move the air either direction–warmed air into the house in winter, out of the house in summer. They are considerably more energy efficient than conventional air conditioners and furnaces. Prices aren’t cheap, but they are coming down, and there are rebates and tax breaks available.

    Yesterday, the third of the three companies I’ve contacted did their evaluation. One company is a conventional heating/AC company, the other two take a more comprehensive approach to electrification, providing more of a one stop shop, so that solar can be installed (I already have that) as well as heat pumps, electric water heaters, electrical vehicle chargers, hookups for induction stoves, etc, etc. They essentially function as general contractors for the projects and can do assessments and provide guidance for the process, as well as assist in decision making–what projects in what order, and what can reasonably wait for another time. Once the last proposal and bid arrives, I’ll make a decision on what to do. Both of the vendors I’m seriously considering have assured me that I can have things installed in time for “cooling season”.

    It’s exciting and interesting to see what is now available and I’m happy to be making the change. It feels like the time is right to be doing this, and as the same health issues that necessitated the downstairs bedroom are also keeping BA and I from doing significant travel, there’s room in the budget. Might was well make things comfortable and more energy efficient!

    Written for E in the Blogging from A to Z Challenge and the Ragtag daily prompt of cusp

    12 comments on E is for Electric

  • D is for Don’t

    April 5, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, COVID 19, essays, Uncategorized
    D is for Don’t
    Daily writing prompt
    How have you adapted to the changes brought on by the Covid-19 pandemic?
    View all responses

    At the beginning of the pandemic, there were a lot of don’ts, regarding masks, exposure, risks; there was a lot known in general about transmission and even more unknown about this new virus. Being a medical person, I was able to read and understand a lot of the recommendations, and also was well aware that such information is a continually changing and updating process. What is known and understood and the “truth” last month may be quite different this month or next. For many people, this was unsettling, and there was a group that used this as grounds for opposing anything they didn’t want to be true. Denial is a powerful instinct. If we don’t know what to do with something or it’s way outside our usual framework of understanding, the first reaction is often denial. No, it can’t be so.

    Accepting that denial exists, and then allowing for the possibility that one’s brain or concepts may well need to change is part of the process of living. We adapt all the time. It isn’t easy, and its necessary. Nothing stays the same, we age, forever fantasies fade, we fall in and out of love, pets die, fashions and priorities change. So it has been with Covid 19. At least for most of us, the initial denial (it won’t be anything much, its just a cold or flu, it will be gone in a month or two) has faded.

    Covid 19 is here, and likely to remain around, now shifting from pandemic to endemic (like influenza or colds). How have I adapted? Well, I’m more aware of where I go, when and with whom. I’ve never been a big one for crowds, and I’m less likely to hit crowded events now. Considering the circumstances, I may or may not wear a mask, whether for protection against Covid, a cold, or the flu. I’ve gotten ill enough times after flying that I may continue masking on planes. I’ve understood the benefits of masking differently than I once did.

    This pandemic has informed my understanding of personal and communal risk, and I’ve adjusted my choices accordingly. When I was actively practicing family medicine, the ethos was that one worked no matter what, including when one was ill. I figured out early on that if I had my annual cold and took one day off to rest and recover, I was much more functional for the following 3 weeks than if I had sucked it up and just kept working. My partners and the office staff found this annoying, as it was never easy to reschedule patients and cover for me, but I realized it was healthier for me and my patients. I was a better doc if I wasn’t sick and I wasn’t exposing my patients to my crud. I’ve noticed that since the onset of the pandemic, there has been a societal change of not sending kids to school or going to work when ill. Of course, when one doesn’t have paid sick time, that’s a problem, too, and fortunately, that’s changing for some folks.

    Don’t go to work or school or out to sing karaoke if you’re ill. And in my case, I don’t sing particularly well, so don’t sing karaoke applies all the time.

    Do trust yourself to make choices that are right for you. Mine might be different than yours. Do respect other people and don’t put their health at risk because you don’t want to change your own plans or be inconvenienced. It’s that same old playground maxim of consideration of others which still applies.

    Written for the ragtag daily prompt of karaoke, the wordpress daily prompt on Covid 19, and the Blogging from A to Z prompt of D.

    17 comments on D is for Don’t

  • B is for Bach

    April 3, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z
    B is for Bach

    Johann Sebastian Bach is my favorite composer. There are many others, of many genres, whose music I also love, but when in doubt, give me Bach. This was reinforced for me yesterday. It was one of those days when I awoke out of sorts, irritable, sensitive, prone to take things personally, not unlike an overtired rambunctious toddler denying her need for a nap. Not a comfortable place to be in, for me or anyone in my vicinity.

    After a bit, I went upstairs, and remembered it was Sunday. Colorado Public Radio’s classical channel has some fine programs on Sunday morning. Sing! features vocal music and its followed by the Baroque Show. I tuned in, and there it was, Bach coming over the airwaves. Listening for a few minutes, I began to feel myself settle, my nervous system reorganizing. Some of it seemed due to the rhythm, some to the melody.

    This is the magic of music. Conscious or not, our systems respond to the sound, the rhythm. It can organize or disorganize, express a variety of emotions and concepts. And it can clearly facilitate healing, evoke memories and shift the energy of individuals and groups.

    For me, when in doubt, play me some Bach.

    And if you’re interested in listening, this is a link to CPR Classical. It can be streamed worldwide. Enjoy! https://www.cpr.org/classical/

    for the Blogging from A to Z Challenge

    and the Ragtag Daily Prompt of rambunctious

    4 comments on B is for Bach

  • Bad Influence?

    April 2, 2023
    Uncategorized
    Bad Influence?

    “What would you have named after you if you could”?

    The above is today’s WordPress prompt and today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt is influencer. Related concepts, for sure, and one that I find quite unhealthy in many cases.

    Influencers, using one’s social media presence to essentially be an advertiser. It seems to play off the cult of celebrity, which appears based on appearance and illusion more that substance. Yes, I follow you tubers who manage to live a pretty interesting life with income from being influencers. Not all of them are caught up in the selling of things, and some have used it to break out of conventional lifestyles of jobs and mortgages, etc. But often, I see the problems as well.

    Back in my therapist days, I had a young client who would get caught up in this, and every time he did, his mood would spiral down, and he would get stuck in the trap of contorting himself to get “likes” as opposed to being himself and letting the likes fall where they may. At the same time, he was longing for a serious relationship and his great sadness was when possible mates would not see him or accept him for who he is. The trap becomes clear. Who one actually is and the “carefully curated” (gag) media image are rarely the same. Someone who desires you for your media image is unlikely to be interested in the full messy human that each of us is. Not for me, thanks, and I see so many younger people stuck in that place of image over substance and then in great pain when it fails.

    So what would I have named after me? My initial thought was nothing. However, in our local open spaces, there is a tradition of memorial benches being placed along trails or scenic overlook, often with a plaque naming the person being honored. I could go with that, using my presence or memory to provide a place to sit and enjoy the natural world.

    To me, the point of living is to be truly ourselves, bringing that which is unique to us into the world. That may or may not lead to likes, but it may well lead to health and happiness.

    I’ll close with a quote from the I-ching: Before a man can become great, he must look foolish to the crowd.

    9 comments on Bad Influence?

  • A is for . . . .

    April 1, 2023
    Blogging From A to Z, essays, ragtag daily prompt, Uncategorized
    A is for . . . .
    Daily writing prompt
    What makes you laugh?
    View all responses

    It’s April and so the beginning of the A to Z Blogging Challenge. I haven’t signed up yet, and once again, I’m ambivalent about doing so. Today is the first day of my second year of retirement, and I remain reluctant to take on obligations and scheduled events. And, I would like to do more writing.

    So I spin around, yes, no, maybe so.

    For me, the challenge is to frame the challenge as an invitation rather than an obligation. I’m very tired of obligation and duty and have plenty of that in my life already. I’ll extend the invitation to myself to show up and write, encouraging my inner critic to sit back and relax. Nothing to worry about here, folks, just keep moving.

    That some writers are very organized, planning their themes and posts well in advance, getting drafts done is impressive to me on one level. I work at things, do projects, fulfill obligations, and I’ve found over the years that I do much better if I allow myself to put things together in a way that makes sense to me, fits with my rhythm. I do laugh at myself when I catch myself starting to get caught in the sticky web of others or mythical societal/academic expectations. I can still hear certain teachers voices on making outlines, following a plan. Very useful in house building and rocket launches, and I do lists and planning well for certain activities. But for writing? The fastest way to shut down interest and creativity for me is to give myself to someone else’s agenda. I’ll keep reminding myself, and we’ll see if I’m still writing come April Zth.

    Written for today’s Ragtag Daily Prompt of Spin and

    the April Blogging from A to Z Challenge

    24 comments on A is for . . . .

  • And what do you want to Be, dear?

    March 31, 2023
    essays, Uncategorized
    And what do you want to Be, dear?
    Daily writing prompt
    When you were five, what did you want to be when you grew up?
    View all responses

    I don’t quite recall what I wanted at five, although I know a few years later I alternated between wanting to be a gym teacher and a math teacher.

    A friend of mine during my med school years recalled wanting to be a trash truck (not the person, the truck) when he grew up. It was the biggest baddest thing his young child self could imagine. His mother was not amused by this. He ended up becoming a gastroenterologist, which still has something to do with waste.

    Such a common question we ask of children, and how often that desire is quashed or amended by those who “know better”. Often we are channeled towards prestige or achievement, or fulfilling other people’s dreams. And sometimes we are told to restrict our dreams, “you’ll never make a living doing that”, “you’re not smart enough”, girls don’t or boys don’t. etc. etc. In my ideal world, we would all be encouraged to explore and experiment and discover. Who knows where that might lead. Possibilities matter.

    While I listed above my early thoughts of teaching gym or math, by the time I was in junior high, I had decided that I wanted to become a physician. In high school, following the issuance of a very heavy wool uniform and the understanding that all my Friday nights would be spent performing at football games, I decided to drop band. As I was in the counselor’s office to do this, he decided to ask me about future plans. I told him I planned to become a doctor. His response: “That’s lots of education and you’ll waste it when you get married and have kids. You should be a medical technologist” and he handed me a pamphlet on same. I reported all this to my mom, a homemaker by choice, and she told me that if I wanted to be a doctor, that’s what I should do. Well done, Mom. The guidance counselor was relocated to the vocational technical school the next year.

    Fast forward 16 or 17 years from 1970. I’m now a family physician, practicing a few towns over from where I grew up. The senior partner in the practice is on vacation, so the rest of us are seeing his patients as needed. I pick up the chart for my next patient and there he is. The very counselor who tried to quash my plans, in for a blood pressure check. Delighted by this irony, I start laughing and go hide in my office. It took some minutes for me to compose myself enough to go in and provide professional care. The temptation was to put on the BP cuff, pump it all the way up and say, OK, Bob, we’re gonna talk. Another of my mother’s maxims played in my ear “be bigger than they are”. So he just had a blood pressure check.

    Trust your dreams, follow your heart, believe in yourself. A message for everyone, five or seventy five.

    12 comments on And what do you want to Be, dear?

  • Fifteen Months Later

    March 30, 2023
    essays, marshall fire, Uncategorized
    Fifteen Months Later

    The Marshall Fire hit Dec 30, 2021. Fifteen months ago. In a matter of hours, fueled by extreme winds and dryness, more than 1000 homes and businesses were destroyed, as well as acres of open space burned. My town, Louisville, lost 550 homes; whole neighborhoods are gone.  

    I was fortunate. The destroyed homes begin 2 blocks from my home and I didn’t have major smoke damage. However, I have now discovered burned parts of my roof. My neighbor was having some work done on her gutters and the roofers noticed that a ridge vent shingle panel had blown off of my roof.  When they went up to replace the shingles, they also noticed holes burned into the shingles.  I knew the fire was close, and I hadn’t realized how very close to losing my home I had come. Given the burned paper found in my yard and shown in the featured photo, I guess I’m not so surprised, although humbled once again.

    So after more than a year, progress is clear. Many homes are in the rebuilding process, and once barren burned areas are now hives of construction activity. This is the graphic off of the city’s rebuilding website:

    As you can see, half of the structures lost are now permitted for rebuilding, more are under review, and two of homes lost have been rebuilt and reoccupied. This is a lengthy process, and it will be some time before the process is complete. My friend Nancy and I walked today and part of our walk was through a recovering area. We noticed the progress, many homes now with building above their new foundations. A former colleague of Nancy’s lost his home and they are hoping to have their final inspection today, possibly becoming the third family moved home in town. Others are still waiting their turn to rebuild. Another friend of mind lost her townhome. When I saw her in January, they were hoping that rebuilding would start by March. I saw surveyors there last week, otherwise, its bare dirt. And other bare lots still have for sale signs. For whatever reason, their owners are not rebuilding. Sometimes its cost, sometimes it’s the effort, and sometimes people have decided that they don’t want to return to the site of so much loss.

    And today is a red flag (high fire risk) day. It’s warm, about 60, and the wind has picked up this afternoon and is gusting. Like many in town, I’m much more edgy about the wind than I once was. Rebuilding continues, homes go up, the landscape looks more “normal” and it is all changed, we are all changed having lived through this wildfire event that prior to its occurrence had seemed unfathomable. Like many others on this changing planet of ours, we are changed, things aren’t and may never be the same.

    Hopefully we will keep learning and healing. Below are two photos taken in the weeks after the fire, followed by two recent photos showing all the rebuilding.

    Burned and rubble filled hillsides are transforming.

    8 comments on Fifteen Months Later

  • Another Language?

    March 27, 2023
    cats, ragtag daily prompt
    Another Language?
    Daily writing prompt
    What’s a secret skill or ability you have or wish you had?
    View all responses

    Now if was a secret skill or ability I have, it would no longer be a secret if I wrote about it, would it?

    What would I like to have? My cat just came downstairs meowing. He wants something. What, I’m not sure. He has food, water, a clean box, I just gave him drugs (catnip) and cut his nails (I’m sure that’s not what he wanted, but it reminded me he was due). Being able to decipher cat better than I do would be a dandy superpower. And, as I sat with it further, I got today’s answer–he wanted the rest of his breakfast. Ziggy often eats his morning wet food in the sitting room where BA and I have our coffee. Then he heads upstairs for his morning sleep. Today, he didn’t eat much of his breakfast, so it was still sitting in that room, which because today is cold and snowy, the doors were closed to keep it cozy for BA. I fetched the food, brought it upstairs, he ate 3 bites and now seems to be a happy boy.

    Some would say that chatting with the cat, endeavoring to understand and interpret their responses is a sign of mind that it less than stable, but I disagree. More and more researchers are discovering that non human species, both plant and animal are much more sophisticated in their communication skills that we (ignorant or arrogant) humans ever realized.

    So I’ll keep working on improving my feline language skills. Ziggy says thank you and is now continuing to get his daily 20 hours of rest. Cheers!

    Written in response to the ragtag daily prompt of stable and the word press prompt of secret skill.

    One of Z’s favorite poses
    8 comments on Another Language?

  • Brrrrr !

    January 15, 2024
    Uncategorized

    That -5 is Fahrenheit. For the rest of the world, that’s minus 21. Friggen cold, no matter the scale, unless you reside in a polar region. Catch Y’all later, I’m going out to shovel

    3 comments on Brrrrr !
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Curious Steph

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