Sitting in a pub on a Friday night, a place I’ve been loyal to for years. Laughing with friends on whatever; surrounded by faces of people that had been loyal too.

My spot is at the bar on a long chair, on a corner where I can spot everyone. I like to give friends my attention but I like to guess what everyone is talking about.

Are they friends, colleagues or lovers? Drinking to celebrate or to forget? Do they look honest together or do they look like one of those cheating role plays.

A small hand hold my hand, tiny and soft of a child, I freaked I took it off and looked to see a small boy standing. Dark skin, clean clothes a wide smile on his face, holding a dozen of red plastic roses that he wishes to sell for the day.

I have to say I live in a city where beggars are found all the way. But for me there’s a big difference between begging for need or lazy to work that’s why I’m very picky on choosing which one to believe. And those kids are obliged to do it, owned by a man who had made a business of getting a sum of tenchildren to beg and bring him money at the end of the day.

I looked at him and asked him for his name, he said my name is Mohamed and I’m 6 years old. I told him I know how this goes and I don’t support this case. I don’t help kids who’d take that money and give it to a man who has no shame. He said I’m Syrian, my family is back home where war is. I’m only here with my little brother and I’m only helping that man to keep us safe.

His eyes stopped smiling and his smile rested; he could break my heart in a second. I asked him if he’s hungry he said yes, I proposed I go buy him a sandwich. I left my friends and went all the way to get him a sandwich to eat. He asked to kiss me I leaned forward and he left a sweet little kiss on my cheek. He asked me if he’ll see me again I said yes I come to that place so often. He smile at me with a big bite in his mouth and said I’ll be back to see you again.

And so, days and weeks have passed and our promise stood still. I search for him as he searches for me. We go eat, sit at the edge of the sidewalks streets. We laugh, we debate, he shared with me his deepest sorrow but we could always manage to end up smiling. I’d squeeze him and kiss him to see his eyes shining and smiling.

He liked to surprise me, hide behind me and hold me close, asking me to guess who he is or take my phone and enjoy taking photos of me and him nonstop. But never had he let down the dozen of flowers off his hands, it’s his duty and he needs to commit.

One of those days he showed up with a frown on his face. I asked if anyone touched him or treated him bad. He said “no I’m just tired of working. I wake up at 6 stand in different area road, try to sell those flowers and at night I’m brought up here and he’d only pick us up at 2am. We go home to rest but we’re 12 in one small room so I don’t sleep to wake up and stand on my foot”

A 6 years old boy saying this how is it any fair. He could easily make my warm tears drown my face. I hugged him tight, squeezed him to my heart “I’m doing as much as I can. Trying to make sure you’ve eaten, smiled or been kissed for the day. But if anything more I can do and I haven’t let me know. You’re a piece of my heart and I’d do anything”

He smiled at me with puppy shiny eyes and said “Adopt me, take with you wherever you are”

It was the night I haven’t slept thinking of his last sentence. I feel this kid as my own child with all my senses. I’d love him to grow up, study, learn, play, draw his own path and pursue his dreams. It was only the next day I’ve called the lawyer asking but he said I can’t as long as his parents living. And even if they are I must be married to make sure the kid grows in a full family. Plan B was taking him to an adoptive school, I’ve called them they agreed and said I can have him for weekends if I am the one paying for his living.

Now that I have a plan I went to tell him I searched a lot, no way I could find him. I’ve asked people who always stand there; they said they have seen him neither days nor nights. I kept the hope of finding him again but as time passed now I only wish he’s safe.