Welcome to la la land .
entry restricted for the privileged few who has it in them to b called a boozer .
so where does that put me ....not necessarily a boozer but have my share of gulps .
As some legend have put it u don't need to have a reason to booze ....a sunset or sunrise is good enough to b a starter . small get together with my friends often land me in the company of a bunch of drunkards which can offer u the bestest of the hilarious evenings , mornings , afternoons or nights..whichever u prefer that is .
don't trust me ....please feel free to ask someone who has been there and done that .
Such booze parties often end up having a victim , to put it colloquially ...paambu (snake) the one who hikes up the entertainment quotient with his kick ass frankness , dramatics and at times some on your face confessions .
that's something which has kept me glued many a times . after all what's that one thing which ticks a boozer making him shed his well preserved image as if it wasn't the real him . that's when u r taken to LA LA land ..a place where one tries to b himself or may b what he actually wants to be .
From emotional outbursts to hard core abuses....funny snippets to embarassing truths ... i have seen it all and of course experienced too.
ask me and i would say la la land make people more opinionated than they actually are . it's a free world where u don't carry any baggage and can let your hair down with much ease . one is not guarded to speak his mind or being judge mental with his choices .
It may break or make ties . there are times when u crack the mould letting others know what u are but then it can also lead to a moment of awkwardness .
having said that i often wonder y does the victims take a U turn the very next day . there would be never ending session of regrets , apologies and finally a warm hug .
So what about the previous rendezvous ...was it a act or a fiasco
let it b the mysterious self and that's most adorable thing about la la land . one is not taken seriously after a certain point and your are always forgiven for your harmless show .
Saturday, November 20, 2010
Saturday, April 3, 2010
one pizza pepperoni and dho samosa
Sunday afternoons in allahabad can be pretty boring . usually after hours of net surfing and movies i feel like bursting out or do something which will want me to do more than just sitting in front of my lap. i step out of my bed hardly twice or thrice on holidays and that too only for the daily chorus .
It was during one such boring sunday i thought of ordering a pizza from dominos in civil lines , a city spot which is about 10km away from my hostel. frankly i was never a sucker of pizza. i have had my share of this greek food in my home city ,kochi, but that was mostly a part of showing off by getting into some cozy restaurants and shouting from the roof top that i am also a part of the IN crowd .but off late i started taking a liking towards this foreign dish. though initially it started off as one among the many things which i did to kill my boredom now i enjoy having it once in a while . the only hitch is that this expensive food can cost you dear.
Time was around 1 :30 in the afternoon. after brushing my teeth i took the pamphlet of dominos from my shelf and zeroed on pepperoni pizza, which i drool over. i ringed the number and placed my order, a pep pizza with cheese burst,a non veg pasta and a coke. usually i end up a having hole in my purse whenever this eventful day happens and it was no different this time.
After waiting for some 45 mins i got a call from the delivery boy who said that the guard was not letting him inside and asked me to come over the gate nearer to the railway bridge which passes through my collage. the summer heat was at it's peak with hot wind blowing heavily and sunlight piercing into the skin which makes one feel as if your worst enemy is playing with needles on your body. i hurled some abuses on guard and stepped out of my room.after walking through that smouldering heat i reached the gate where a short guy in blue uniform was standing with my pizza. i handed over a 500 rupee note to him and he gave me back 10 rupees. i said him to keep that as tip and started walking back.
Between the gate and student's canteen in my hostel there is a middle aged man who sell white kulfi on his small rolling shop. while i was returning i saw a small kid walking towards the kulfiwala. he might be some 4 yrs old. he was wearing small brown trouser which was torn and a dusty check shirt which didn't had any buttons. he was brown skinned and his hair was messy . his nose was watery and saliva was pumping out from his mouth. his appearance was ugly and i could easily make out that he hadn't taken a bath for many days. still i couldn't take my eyes from him. he was one of the many kids of the building workers staying inside our hostel. he was standing in front of that kulfi shop but didn't say anything to that man. he was simply staring on that mud pot from which the man was taking out kulfi. i knew that the little boy wanted to have that kulfi .he was holding some coins in his hands but maybe it was not enough. the cost of one kulfi is 5rupees but probably his parents couldn't afford that. i passed through the boy but i couldn't walk straight . i turned back twice and saw him still standing there. i kept on looking at him till i could see only a glimpse of his body.
I reached my room and was desperate to unwrap my pizza and have it. i tore the masala mixes and threw it all over the pizza. hot cheese was flowing out and the smell of pasta was irresistible. for now that boy was a thing of past and i focused fully on my pizza. i switched on my lap and put some loud music. i slowly munched my pizza and pasta along with a gulp of coke. i was happy that i could make my lazy afternoon happening and went back to my usual stuffs.
It was 2: 30 late night and i wanted to sleep . i turned down my lap and switched off light .but like always i was struggling to get a nap. i closed by eyes . many things started flowing into my mind but one face which kept on flashing was that of the boy.
all he wanted to have was one kulfi and by his side there was me walking with a pizza which i bought not to fill my hunger but to wipe my boredom . if i wanted i could have taken some money from my room and bought a kulfi for him. but i didn't . i was completely immersed in my pizza and nothing else mattered to me. i was being selfish and their was some guilt in me which didn't let me sleep. i tried to make myself understand that i didn't do anything wrong and am nobody to give a helping hand to the poor. but somewhere i knew that i was wrong.
The next day their was no class . like always i skipped my breakfast from mess and went to canteen . there was a bit rush inside the canteen and everyone were placing their orders. amidst that rush i saw that same small boy standing in one corner. he was hardly of the knee length of the people standing there and nobody could even see him to take his order . but he was not complaining and was patiently waiting for his turn. he was wearing the same dress and had that rustic look on his face. i went near to him and asked what he wanted . he whispered something which i didn't understand but he uttered samosa which i could make out. i asked bhaiya(man in canteen) to give two samosa and also a packet of biscuit . i gave both samosam and biscuit to him and said him to have them . he showed me his small hands with folded fingers. i opened them . there was a one rupee coin in his hand and he wanted me to take that. i simply smiled and said to go and share those biscuits with his friends . his face was expressionless . their was no smile on his lips nor glitters on his eyes . he simply walked away without telling anything and i just kept looking at him.
Strange are ways of life . while i was spending 500 rupees for a pizza , that small boy had just 1 rupee for a samosa . i was told to believe from my childhood that god creates us all . so why this inequality on his part? was it that boy's mistake that he was born to a poor family where they probably can't even afford three good meals a day?
i asked all these questions to myself but couldn't find a answer. is it destiny ? may be yes. but what kind of destiny is this where majority of people are left to suffer and a minority have all the luxuries in life.
In all likelihood his life will go the same way and mine the way it is now. whether it is destiny or fate , life goes on. i won't stop eat a costly pizza because some poor people are staying by my side. it's my life and i won't sacrifice my happiness for others . but if two samosa and a packet of biscuit could bring some happy moments in that little boy's life then some where down the line i would want to do my share of bits to the needy to make this world a more prosperous and happier place.
It was during one such boring sunday i thought of ordering a pizza from dominos in civil lines , a city spot which is about 10km away from my hostel. frankly i was never a sucker of pizza. i have had my share of this greek food in my home city ,kochi, but that was mostly a part of showing off by getting into some cozy restaurants and shouting from the roof top that i am also a part of the IN crowd .but off late i started taking a liking towards this foreign dish. though initially it started off as one among the many things which i did to kill my boredom now i enjoy having it once in a while . the only hitch is that this expensive food can cost you dear.
Time was around 1 :30 in the afternoon. after brushing my teeth i took the pamphlet of dominos from my shelf and zeroed on pepperoni pizza, which i drool over. i ringed the number and placed my order, a pep pizza with cheese burst,a non veg pasta and a coke. usually i end up a having hole in my purse whenever this eventful day happens and it was no different this time.
After waiting for some 45 mins i got a call from the delivery boy who said that the guard was not letting him inside and asked me to come over the gate nearer to the railway bridge which passes through my collage. the summer heat was at it's peak with hot wind blowing heavily and sunlight piercing into the skin which makes one feel as if your worst enemy is playing with needles on your body. i hurled some abuses on guard and stepped out of my room.after walking through that smouldering heat i reached the gate where a short guy in blue uniform was standing with my pizza. i handed over a 500 rupee note to him and he gave me back 10 rupees. i said him to keep that as tip and started walking back.
Between the gate and student's canteen in my hostel there is a middle aged man who sell white kulfi on his small rolling shop. while i was returning i saw a small kid walking towards the kulfiwala. he might be some 4 yrs old. he was wearing small brown trouser which was torn and a dusty check shirt which didn't had any buttons. he was brown skinned and his hair was messy . his nose was watery and saliva was pumping out from his mouth. his appearance was ugly and i could easily make out that he hadn't taken a bath for many days. still i couldn't take my eyes from him. he was one of the many kids of the building workers staying inside our hostel. he was standing in front of that kulfi shop but didn't say anything to that man. he was simply staring on that mud pot from which the man was taking out kulfi. i knew that the little boy wanted to have that kulfi .he was holding some coins in his hands but maybe it was not enough. the cost of one kulfi is 5rupees but probably his parents couldn't afford that. i passed through the boy but i couldn't walk straight . i turned back twice and saw him still standing there. i kept on looking at him till i could see only a glimpse of his body.
I reached my room and was desperate to unwrap my pizza and have it. i tore the masala mixes and threw it all over the pizza. hot cheese was flowing out and the smell of pasta was irresistible. for now that boy was a thing of past and i focused fully on my pizza. i switched on my lap and put some loud music. i slowly munched my pizza and pasta along with a gulp of coke. i was happy that i could make my lazy afternoon happening and went back to my usual stuffs.
It was 2: 30 late night and i wanted to sleep . i turned down my lap and switched off light .but like always i was struggling to get a nap. i closed by eyes . many things started flowing into my mind but one face which kept on flashing was that of the boy.
all he wanted to have was one kulfi and by his side there was me walking with a pizza which i bought not to fill my hunger but to wipe my boredom . if i wanted i could have taken some money from my room and bought a kulfi for him. but i didn't . i was completely immersed in my pizza and nothing else mattered to me. i was being selfish and their was some guilt in me which didn't let me sleep. i tried to make myself understand that i didn't do anything wrong and am nobody to give a helping hand to the poor. but somewhere i knew that i was wrong.
The next day their was no class . like always i skipped my breakfast from mess and went to canteen . there was a bit rush inside the canteen and everyone were placing their orders. amidst that rush i saw that same small boy standing in one corner. he was hardly of the knee length of the people standing there and nobody could even see him to take his order . but he was not complaining and was patiently waiting for his turn. he was wearing the same dress and had that rustic look on his face. i went near to him and asked what he wanted . he whispered something which i didn't understand but he uttered samosa which i could make out. i asked bhaiya(man in canteen) to give two samosa and also a packet of biscuit . i gave both samosam and biscuit to him and said him to have them . he showed me his small hands with folded fingers. i opened them . there was a one rupee coin in his hand and he wanted me to take that. i simply smiled and said to go and share those biscuits with his friends . his face was expressionless . their was no smile on his lips nor glitters on his eyes . he simply walked away without telling anything and i just kept looking at him.
Strange are ways of life . while i was spending 500 rupees for a pizza , that small boy had just 1 rupee for a samosa . i was told to believe from my childhood that god creates us all . so why this inequality on his part? was it that boy's mistake that he was born to a poor family where they probably can't even afford three good meals a day?
i asked all these questions to myself but couldn't find a answer. is it destiny ? may be yes. but what kind of destiny is this where majority of people are left to suffer and a minority have all the luxuries in life.
In all likelihood his life will go the same way and mine the way it is now. whether it is destiny or fate , life goes on. i won't stop eat a costly pizza because some poor people are staying by my side. it's my life and i won't sacrifice my happiness for others . but if two samosa and a packet of biscuit could bring some happy moments in that little boy's life then some where down the line i would want to do my share of bits to the needy to make this world a more prosperous and happier place.
Friday, February 5, 2010
HOPELESSLY OPTIMISTIC
It's 10 am.already late for the shoot.
so what if am one of the biggest stars of the country and was working like hell till late night??
being a professional i don't have any right to keep the unit waiting for hours.
hey i am not in the hangover of any high-fi dream. was just being myself.
well it's me a day dreamer .
As a 6th grade above average student in k v 2 KOCHI, i was always hooked to trains. the whole idea of passengers making each bogie their home till their respective destination fascinated me.
especially it was the night journeys which made me curious .
how do people sleep in train which shake all the time and won't it be awkward to have food amidst strangers??
all these kind of questions poured into my mind. i remember getting carried away by the conversations which i used to have with abraham punnoose ,my closest buddy in 6th-7th phase, about his long train journeys from chandigarh to kerala and his tiresome experience of spending more than 2 days in a cabin. but for me it was the most enjoyable and attractive part of it.
one day my father told me about the mookambika (manglore) trip which he had planned and the best thing about it was that we were going in train, my first rail journey. we boarded malabar express from ernakulam at around 12 mid night and it was a nearly 13 hr journey to manglore. my level of excitement was at an all time high and had been planning stuffs to do in train for days. finally when i entered the train i couldn't sleep properly ,after all i was doing something which i always wanted to do.
long distance train journeys was always a distant dream for me as i didn't had any friends or close relatives outside kochi ,leave alone another state and somehow i was convinced that i would never get a opportunity to fulfill my dreams ....that is when i first became a DAY DREAMER.
I created a imaginary world where i could be myself and make all my wishes happen. my bed made way for train and pillows became cabins. keeping a tab on the name of trains and their destinations was a hobby of mine in those days which came in handy for my craziness . i used to book ticket in grand trunk express from delhi to chennai and then in madras mail for my forward journey from chennai to ernakulam.
my motto was simple...even if i don't get to shake hands with my dreams at least i can celebrate it within myself.
Now the focus shifts to my collage days. my entry into MNNIT in allahad was quite unexpected . being the much pampered kid of the family i was not allowed to study anywhere outside kerala and it was my decision to apply in this collage. finally when i got admitted i put a brave front and made it clear that i was joining here.
even today my parents wonder how did they let me so far but i guess it was destiny. perhaps i did regret that decision at certain point of time . if not for couple of friends i haven't gained much from here.
but when i look back it was my that decision taken in matter of seconds which helped me fulfill my childhood dreams. it takes two long days for me to reach my place in kerala from allahabad. i still remember my first winter vacation in this collage when i boarded grand trunk exp from itarsi to chennai and then madras mail from there to ernakulam. that rail journey took me back to my school days when i had imagined all these in my mad world and for once it was happening. the feeling was surreal , a sense of fulfillment .for an outsider it would be just another train journey but for me it was my dream which was being real in front of me.
that was the moment when i realized that whatever we desire from the bottom of our heart with purity ,it will be fulfilled. it was that realization which gave me strength to dream harder and lead a positive march towards life. it made me put a smiling face even during my testing times.
Now i have a dream , something which have been with me for a long time . i don't know whether it will happen in real but there is a gut feeling in me that my desire won't go the other way. no matter what others say , am hopelessly optimistic about it . because dreams make our life real and achieving it makes it meaningful.
my present may not look pleasant but future.... it's full of bright stars which i can smell. even when the world goes against me i gather strength from those train journeys which makes me look everything positively .
so what if am one of the biggest stars of the country and was working like hell till late night??
being a professional i don't have any right to keep the unit waiting for hours.
hey i am not in the hangover of any high-fi dream. was just being myself.
well it's me a day dreamer .
As a 6th grade above average student in k v 2 KOCHI, i was always hooked to trains. the whole idea of passengers making each bogie their home till their respective destination fascinated me.
especially it was the night journeys which made me curious .
how do people sleep in train which shake all the time and won't it be awkward to have food amidst strangers??
all these kind of questions poured into my mind. i remember getting carried away by the conversations which i used to have with abraham punnoose ,my closest buddy in 6th-7th phase, about his long train journeys from chandigarh to kerala and his tiresome experience of spending more than 2 days in a cabin. but for me it was the most enjoyable and attractive part of it.
one day my father told me about the mookambika (manglore) trip which he had planned and the best thing about it was that we were going in train, my first rail journey. we boarded malabar express from ernakulam at around 12 mid night and it was a nearly 13 hr journey to manglore. my level of excitement was at an all time high and had been planning stuffs to do in train for days. finally when i entered the train i couldn't sleep properly ,after all i was doing something which i always wanted to do.
long distance train journeys was always a distant dream for me as i didn't had any friends or close relatives outside kochi ,leave alone another state and somehow i was convinced that i would never get a opportunity to fulfill my dreams ....that is when i first became a DAY DREAMER.
I created a imaginary world where i could be myself and make all my wishes happen. my bed made way for train and pillows became cabins. keeping a tab on the name of trains and their destinations was a hobby of mine in those days which came in handy for my craziness . i used to book ticket in grand trunk express from delhi to chennai and then in madras mail for my forward journey from chennai to ernakulam.
my motto was simple...even if i don't get to shake hands with my dreams at least i can celebrate it within myself.
Now the focus shifts to my collage days. my entry into MNNIT in allahad was quite unexpected . being the much pampered kid of the family i was not allowed to study anywhere outside kerala and it was my decision to apply in this collage. finally when i got admitted i put a brave front and made it clear that i was joining here.
even today my parents wonder how did they let me so far but i guess it was destiny. perhaps i did regret that decision at certain point of time . if not for couple of friends i haven't gained much from here.
but when i look back it was my that decision taken in matter of seconds which helped me fulfill my childhood dreams. it takes two long days for me to reach my place in kerala from allahabad. i still remember my first winter vacation in this collage when i boarded grand trunk exp from itarsi to chennai and then madras mail from there to ernakulam. that rail journey took me back to my school days when i had imagined all these in my mad world and for once it was happening. the feeling was surreal , a sense of fulfillment .for an outsider it would be just another train journey but for me it was my dream which was being real in front of me.
that was the moment when i realized that whatever we desire from the bottom of our heart with purity ,it will be fulfilled. it was that realization which gave me strength to dream harder and lead a positive march towards life. it made me put a smiling face even during my testing times.
Now i have a dream , something which have been with me for a long time . i don't know whether it will happen in real but there is a gut feeling in me that my desire won't go the other way. no matter what others say , am hopelessly optimistic about it . because dreams make our life real and achieving it makes it meaningful.
my present may not look pleasant but future.... it's full of bright stars which i can smell. even when the world goes against me i gather strength from those train journeys which makes me look everything positively .
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