I was looking at some old stuff and thought I’d give this a little moment.

The Case of the Fight in the Big Top at Cullompton-on-Rye

Sparkly Sue from Balwhinnnie
Worked at the Circus of Light.
She mucked out the camels each morning,
And danced on the highwire at night.
She was gorgeous in flashing suspenders.
In diamantes and sequins so gay.
At six forty-five every evening,
And the pensioners, cheap matinee.
Now, Walter, the big top erector,
Had a secret inside of his head,
He fancied the pants off our Suzie,
And wanted to take her to bed.
He tried to entice her with flowers.
To woo her with chocolates and cake.
But Sue was determinedly single.
And regarded our Walt as a rake
No, no, she would cry with emotion
Whenever he leered at her bum.
I shall never allow your advances.
And what’s more, I’ve told your old mum.
But the truth is a little more sordid
Than Suzie’s high-flying ideals.
She had lusts of her own towards Nigel
Who worked in a tank with the Seals.
She admired his manly demeanour,
His pectorals,’specially when wet.
She wanted to be his beloved
But hadn’t quite managed it yet.
The case reached a nasty conclusion
One night in Cullompton-on- Rye
When Walter found out about Nigel
And gave him a thump in the eye.
So whenever you visit the circus
And it sweeps you away with delight
Remember performers are humans
And the magic is only at night.

dd