The Burnham factor…

Posted on January 24, 2026 | Leave a comment
Give us a kiss, ducky…

The news that a seat with a 10,000 Labour majority is about to become vacant is posing an interesting conundrum for Starmer’s possible sucessor, Andy Burnham. Will he stand or won’t he?

In order to stand, Burnham needs the approval of the Labour NEC which is currently stuffed full of Starmer loyalists. Thereby hangs the problem for Starmer. If he blocks Burnhams selection that could be taken as a sign of panic and insecurity. On the other hand, if Burnham gets through then he’d be a shoe in challenger for the leadership. Not that he’s a certainty to be the next Labour PM because many of the people on the back benches simply don’t like him and may well decide not to back him. Either way, Starmer is toast.

Burnham’s been here before. In 2010 he stood for the leadership but was beaten by Ed Miliband then, following Miliband’s resignation after the 2015 general election defeat, Burnham launched a campaign to succeed him. He finished a distant second behind Jeremy Corbyn.

So is it third time lucky for Burnham, or will he follow the old saying “If at first you don’t succeed, try, try again, and then give up becasue there’s no point beating your head against a brick wall” ?

Then again, winners never quit and quitters never win. A week is a long time in politics. May you live in interesting times

That’s it. I’ve run out of cliches…

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Pointless petitions…

Posted on January 22, 2026 | Leave a comment

Have you ever wondered what happens when you sign an on-line petition? Well, I’ll tell you. It’s sod all!

Any petition on the government e-petition site is considered for a debate in Parliament. I say “considered” because that’s stage one of the ‘fuck off!’ process. They’ll consider it. Doesn’t means they will actually do it.

Stage 2 of treating the electorate with contempt – as if cancelling elections two years in a row wasn’t enough – is to debate it then dismiss it. Last Monday the Commons debated the third petition calling for an immediate General Election. This one garnered over 3 million signatures. You can read the debate on Hansard if you’re a masochist, but to paraphrase it went like this : “This house will debate the petition” “Resolved, this house has debated the petition” “Motion passed” and basically that’s it.

Today, there was another e-petition raised by Rupert Lowe regarding illegal immigration which reached the 100,000 signature threshold for a debate in Parliament. The government is required to respond and you can read the metaphoric pile of horse shit they came out with here.

The document contains so many inaccurate statements that it’s well worth a read. It says the number of illegal immigrants have gone down when they’ve gone up. It states that there have been 20,000 fewer small boat crossings since the one in, one out deal with France. You get the picture – and that’s only the tip of the iceberg.

As the Nazi propandist Joseph Goebbels once famously said “Repeat a lie often enough and it becomes the truth”

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Full-of-Fear Kier…

Posted on January 20, 2026 | 1 comment

News this morning that the Donald has confirmed what we this side of the pond have known for some time : Starmer has no backbone…

Two things seem to have ticked him off. Firstly why the hell is he giving away British sovereign territory to a potentially hostile power – China. From a UK viewpoint of course we should be asking why Starmer is committing billions of our hard earned taxes to leasing back what was ours in the first place.

And then there’s this mornings news that planning permission has been granted for China to build a massive spy centre in the middle of London. No doubt that will make him popular when Never Here Kier visits China later this month.

Do I see more u-turns on the horizon? Possibly! There’s the likelihood of a legal challenge over the Chinese embassy plans and the Lords have thrown out the Chaggos deal, so that goes back to the Commons.

And while all this animosity with The Donald is going on, Full of Fear Kier has decided that he’s not going to attend the economic summit in Davos due to “urgent matters at home” – so absolutely nothing to do with him having to face Trump in person.

All in all I’m inclined to latch onto an expression for Starmer that I came across the other day: The Cowardly Dictator. To me it sums him up perfectly…

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Let’s all do the shuffle…

Posted on January 19, 2026 | Leave a comment

Well it’s been quite few days hasn’t it? First Nadihm Zahawi, then Robert Jenrick and now Andrew Rosindale. And last week we had 20 councillors jump ship predominently from the Conservatives but also from the Greens and Limp Dumps.

So the big question this week is when is a well known Labour figure going to cross over to Reform. Farage has hinted that it’s going to happen on Thursday, so we wait with baited beath. My money is on Kate Hoey. She was a prominent figure in the Leave EU campaign when she worked with Farage. I could be wrong of course.

And then there’s Karl Turner. He’s been a Labour MP for 15 years and last week said that he is “ashamed” of the Prime Minister and described the justice minister David Lammy as “lazy” in a furious outburst over controversial Government plans to scrap the ancient right of trial by jury.

Whatever happens next, my view is that most of the new intake of Labour MPs are too drippy and woke to cross the floor. The back benchers are too left wing and the Cabinet have little or no real world experience, which for Farage is a major turn off. That leaves the so called “blue Labour” group, recently reformed. Could one of them decide enough is enough?

Badenoch meanwhile is concentrating on the character assination of Jenrick. She’s called him a liar and said you can’t believe a word that comes out of his mouth. In which case, why did you appoint him to the shadow cabinet Kemi?

But at least it’s good to know that Kemi is 100% certain that no other shadow cabinet members will defect. Just like she was last week.

So why the picture above then? Well all this shuffling around has put me in mind of the Monster Raving Looney Party. They knew how to do a cabinet shuffle! Lay it down, take the doors off and jump in. Perhaps Starmer could learn a thing or two from them on how to do a proper shuffle…

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Potholes are good!

Posted on January 18, 2026 | Leave a comment


There’s been a lot of fuss here in Smalltown about the state of our roads and if there’s one thing we’re good at here it’s making a fuss – especially when we’re being unfairly criticised. Oh yes!

It seems that we’ve been designated as a red zone for potholes! Apparently they’re causing a lot of damage to our residents vehicles. So we sent our roving reporter, Johnny Dashcam to a local garage to find out what the fuss was about…

“So what’s all this about potholes damaging cars”

“Well see for yourself. Just look at the suspension on this one. Totally wrecked and the insurance won’t cover it…

“So that’s no good for anyone then is it?

“Oh I don’t know. It’s been great for my business. Turnover’s up and I’ve taken on extra staff so you could argue that leaving things as they are saves the government money and boosts the local economy. It’s a win win really isn’t it?”

Except for the poor old motorists – but then the Government’s always regarded them as a cash cow so what’s new…?

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Posted in #ReformUK, politics, Small Town Man