Mid-December Mourning

Can you remember being young and in school?

Memories traveling back, friends and teachers

celebrating the smiles

The laughter echoing the classrooms

Focus on studies and of course

Seriousness of the Pledge of allegiance

One Nation

Indivisible

Liberty and Justice for All

Sadness placed a veil over memories

Now visions of cries and fright

Separation, rejection, and malice

Root is planted, we must garden

Weed out the indifference

Mend we must, repair is essential

What is the solution?

How can we go to days filled with Hope, confidence, optimism, courage and faith?

We must plan, dream, desire, and wish for a goal, an expectation that has the likelihood of promise and to hold on to it with all we have.

My heart goes out to those affected by this day called December 14th 2012

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A day in D’s life

 

My older sister decided to visit for a few days. Phone call at 6pm “What time are you coming home?” I’ll be there around 7:30 “Where is spare key ? I am at your house. ” Taped to inside of storm door. “Do you have food and comfy clothes to lounge in?” Check fridge and cabinets there is plenty of food and look in my dresser for clothes . “Thanks, bye, love you”

I make it home and my dogs receive me at door but no Sister.

I make it to my room and she is on my bed, head phones on, wearing my Armani t-shirt ( that was hung in closet not dresser) reading my journal while eating cereal. On My Bed!

I tap her head…. She takes off headset. Are you five year old? ” No, but you have some good stuff here, who is Sharon? Why did you tell her about the time you crazy glued pennies all over my breasts while I slept?” Sis! Quiet! Grab a different shirt , hang that one up and don’t spill food on my bed. “Oh , I forgot to hug you” As she jumps up , the cereal bowl tips over.

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PATLI CUETLACHTLI

PATLI CUETLACHTLI

 

 

 

It’s not the first time I ran across a Jaguar while trekking through the jungle of the Yucatan peninsula, actually I have come across at least a dozen in my years. This time would prove to be different.

 

I managed to follow the sounds of the familiar birds to guide me close to the cenote (water hole connecting the underground river) and that is when I happened to look at a fallen cedar tree and a jaguar cub that was eagerly almost playfully looking directly at me.

 

I knew this to be a bad sign, one thing was to come close to a full grown jaguar but to be about three yards from a cub was almost certain death. No sooner did that exact thought cross my mind did I hear the huffing, screeching growl behind me. I didn’t look back and everything I knew told me that Jaguars go directly for placing their jaws around the skull of its prey and crushing it with mighty force, so I began a sprint like I never ran before.

 

The large greenery was swiping my face and arms as I ran hoping over obstacles and trying to extract the pounding sounds of the paws behind me. I was two feet from the edge of the cenote and I leaped into the air hearing one last sound. The sound of the rustling thicket as the Jaguar gave up its chase.

 

It was on the fall towards the water but not yet into the water when I woke. I happened to wake to Shirley Temple singing “the Good ship lollipop”. Strange indeed was the dream but even stranger was the fact that I heard the singing. I rose from my bed and walked around my empty house and no sound was about. My dogs were with a friend in preparation to my trip and my nearest neighbor is a lot farther than screaming distance. I continued my search of the house and no TV or radio or even any type of electronic was on, all part of my preparation to leave. Everything in the house gets unplugged except for the sump pump and refrigerator.

 

I go to the restroom humming the words to the song that yes I happen to know by memory and find myself looking into the mirror. Upon looking at myself I notice that my flesh is detaching from my skull. I think to myself “that’s it, the final transformation has begun”.

 

It’s that time of year when reflection is upon me, a time when I have to search within and sort all of the things that have circled around me and make sense of my effect on my surroundings. This is a very tough ordeal for me. I was raised a warrior but told over and over that I would be a healer.

 

I have studied many arts of striking but know my most debilitating blow is the slight touch of my fingers when raising a woman’s chin.

 

I have resisted my calling for what seems generations and I know I am not ready for my 9th death but I do in fact question if I will be as foretold.

 

I turn on the faucet to rinse my face and before I could touch the water I awake from my dream in which I dreamt I was dreaming.

 

I stand looking out the east window and decide to walk into the yard.  Holding my left arm out across my chest as if holding a shield and my right as if holding a spear sideways, I begin my chant. Then I perform my dance to my repeating Chant.

 

tlahtlachia PATLI CUETLACHTLI,  neltocaz PATLI CUETLACHTLI, huiquiliz PATLI CUETLACHTLI

 

Awake! Medicine Wolf, Believe it! Medicine Wolf, Carry it to them! Medicine Wolf.

 

I am PATLI CUETLACHTLI, descendant of both the Culture under the Sun and of the Moon.

 

I was taught to heal the person not the wound, we are all connected and energy is in abundance.

 

I was also told that there would be many Maestro’s in life but the true one is within myself.

 

I have faults, weaknesses and confusion.

 

It is within my faults that I relate, in my weakness my strength reins and during my confusion that I see clearest.

 

 

 

I know not of my path , but I know my touch is real.

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Shadow Magic

Talk of Magic is very common and often disregarded as a joke.

Throughout all of history Magic has been one of the three top beliefs but yet the most laughed at because while one can see apples on trees fall a belief in science is respected and faith in a god is never to be taken lightly.

The belief in magic or the practice of magic has been easily dismissed as trickery or even just insane practice. A simple balance in magic affects all it’s surroundings. Magic is simply a source an energy that can be tapped and molded into a specific result. Many names have been used to describe the source of mystical powers such as mana, numen, chi or kundalini, which actually exists in all things. The most common resouces to take and use are of course the elementals Earth, Air, Water, and Fire.

The most dangerous source to tap into is that of a living creature because while you may take that creatures energy the energy taken most often than not will not mold into the desired outcome. I myself like to tap into my source using chaos magic in the form mostly described as the gnostic state.

Those that have known me a while know that I am a Nahual a direct descendant of the Aztec Nauhalli and the magic passed down to me was from many generations past. I have practiced my magic for many years but most commonly associate it with chaos magic.The use of excitatory gnosis relies on finding a magical source during a state of intense arousal. While this magic is believed to be fed into the unconciouse mind it is perserved within you once tapped and just waiting to be molded into a your creation. In the early 1970’s Chaos Magic was really taking on a life of it’s own. It was formed, this magical discipline known as practioners of Chaos Magic was first formulated in West Yorkshire, England and then took North America by storm by mid 1970’s.

The combination of shamanism and writings from author Carlos Castaneda had many volunteers searching for the gnostic state and many found it through enhanced moods naturally and by way of drug use. While the magic was tapped so often by many,most would just hold it and live a happy few days and let the magic just flow right out not even knowing what it was inside them.

The use of chaos magic is exactly what the name implies it is difficult to tap natually and even when tapped molding it is an experience in itself.

Let me give you an example…… Darkness was spreading through the city and covering each building like a blanket. The lighted windows seemed to get brighter as the night got darker. Then a traveling mist came with the dark. A mist shaped like fog and it appeared to creep over the city muffling the sounds of the night and hid the activities of people who were still out at this hour. Within the shadows of such mist is where I travel. I walk the shadows in anticipation of the call. I wait patiently in the shadow awaiting that one specific call and then I take. The call made to me might be of a lonely soul or a woman experiencing a passionate moment nonetheless once that call to me was made the person calling was in for a magical experience if I chose to respond. On occasion I would ignore such calls simply because I did not think the caller would be strong enough to handle the flood of energy I would bring. So a practical selection process was always in good form. I exited the city after hearing a call from a voice. This voice took me to an unknown destination in my travel my face was smothered in Sea breeze and the fog that carried me left no visual of my distance only that fact that the once on my feet the grass seemed damp and cushioned almost as if fresh sod was just planted. I must admit that this fresh scent of openness and greenery actually left me feeling a bit daft. I found the home from which the caller called and decided to watch through the windows of the home as she thumped on a keyboard and giggling the whole while. I found a comfy spot to sit and watch perched on a wonderfully fragranced Cherry Blossom tree right outside her window. I was beginning to wonder if this beauty ever slept during dark hours when suddenly the lights turned down.
I took the shape of a person that was powerfully built, a strongly featured man who dressed in black pants, black shirt, black shoes and, slipping them on as I approached the target house, black gloves.
I gently tried the window and found it locked. A quick spell and I wedged the sill open and silently lifted the sash opening just enough to fit my 6’1″ frame through, though just barely. I glided my way through the corridors of the house examining every detail of this woman before finding my way to her. I knew where the woman slept, and I knew she was alone. I took to foot and walked softly almost as if treading water not wanting to disturb her dreams as of yet.
The soles of my soft shoes made no sound at all as they padded across the wooden floor. Turning sharply right into the hallway, each measured step was tested first… to see if the floor creaked… to see if she awoke. When it was clear that I would make it to the bedroom door without incident, I checked to make sure that the hood I had pulled over my head was secure and, deftly, I turned the knob to her bedroom. She was soundly asleep and the blue glow of a small computer screen illuminated the room. I slipped over to the bedside and, cupping my palm, placed it fast and firmly over her mouth. She awoke with a start… thinking first that it was a bad dream, then… the smell of the leather glove over her mouth, the sudden pounding of her heart, the very real figure in black before her, made her wrench to get free, to scream without sound as the glove and my hand muffled her cries. She thought furiously, wondering what did she learn in rape-prevention classes. Then wondered if I was there to rob her, but She knew better the moment she thought it. Burglars never wake their victims if they can help it. No, she realized, this entry could be nothing but a rape. She went limp as a nauseous feeling passed through her. She resulted to wondering what I would do to her. The thought of rape, beating and killing her ran rampant through her mind.
Then I spoke… “Now… keep VERRRY quiet! I’m not going to hurt you; I’m only going to share some magic with you. I’m going to lift my hand from your mouth, if you scream out, I’m going to hit you, so don’t try it. It won’t help, no one is around at this hour anyway.” I lifted the gloved hand and sat on the side of the bed next to her. She was thinking that there was something strangely familiar about my build. It seemed like the body of a man she had very recently seen, but she couldn’t place it. Had she met him? Had she, somehow, attracted him???!!! Where???!!!
She decided to use foul language towards me and the accent and words she used only made her that much more attractive. She insisted that I would never get away with this!”
“Oh…” I said very arrogantly, “but I AM going to get away with it. After all you called me here. I would not have come this far if the connection was not strong. I know a bit about you… I know what you like, and if you play along, you might even enjoy yourself! Now… take off that nightgown!”
“You daft bastard!” she spit… “You hurt me in any way and I’ll see you burn in hell!” I laughed gently at her threat and she noticed the nearly musical quality to my voice. I was obviously someone of a professional background, educated…. and she didn’t know why, but this relaxed her a bit. She pulled the gown over her head and she heard me suck in his breath appreciatively as her beautiful breasts bounced free. My eyes narrowed and she could see me stare at the nipples even as my gloved hand moved to touch them. She couldn’t believe this… she was actually beginning to become aroused against her will!
“Now… lay back!” I commanded, ” and just relax your body. You won’t get hurt, and I’ll even wear a condom”.
“Oh… lucky me!” she said sarcastically. But she lay back against her headboard, letting her breasts relax against her chest, and her naked legs stretched forth on top of the bed.
I pulled one glove off, and she noticed that my hands were not the hands of an office professional, but the hands of someone who worked for a living. For not the last time this night, she thought that there was something familiar about me! My ungloved hand caressed her breasts; First the left one, then the right one. The hand slid along her leg over the top of her thigh and down over the knees and along the shin. She felt a twinge of guilt at the pleasurable sensation. Damn it! She determined not to let me control her! I told her to roll over on her stomach. She did, and she felt the hand smooth over the curves of her ass, the gloved hand prying at the inside of her thighs. The sensation of the leather felt oddly exciting and I suddenly clapped a hard smack with the glove that startled her and broke the silence. “Hey! What the hell was that for?”
“Be quiet ” I said! “You will speak when I tell you to speak!” She went limp again and my hand parted her legs slightly and, involuntarily, her ass slightly raised to receive what she was sure would be a succession of blows.
If she could see it, both ass cheeks had the outline of a man’s hand, reddened, against her milky-fleshed bottom. Again, she found the excitement that this caused disquieting. The ungloved hand crept up and she felt the tips of my rough fingers sliding along the inside of her right thigh. My finger was gentle; it touched lightly on the outside edge of her opening and made small circular motions around the lips. She found herself opening up to my gentle prodding.
While the rough, ungloved hand played at the innermost crease of her thighs, the gloved hand reached under her and firmly grasped her tits, first one, and then the other. The unfamiliar feel of leather on her nipples caused them to grow taut and a twinge of… what??? Desire? Caused her to relax her legs and ass more and the ungloved hand slipped the first joint of my middle finger into the moist cleft. She could feel me moving the large finger slowly in and out of her while the gloved hand cupped, fondled, and felt her breasts. She wondered at this point what would be next.
She did not have to wait long for an answer! I reached into a pocket and took out a long, black, bandana. She was only aware of it when I started to fit it over her eyes. She became alarmed thinking that this is point where I would hurt her. She cried to please not hurt her. Begging for a word of promise to not hurt her.
“Be Quiet,” I said. “I’m going to blindfold you. I want to take off my hood to lick your sweet nectar, but I don’t want you to see me. If you make any trouble I might hurt you. Now, just lift your head….” She lifted her head from the pillow as directed and I pulled the black kerchief tightly around her head encircling it at eye level. I knotted it behind her and, using yet another two, I flipped her onto her back and tied each of her arms to the bedposts. Again she struggled instinctively, not liking the way that this was going and tremendously fearful of the ultimate result. “Just stop fighting me!” I said. “I’m only here because you called me… Give me what you wanted to give me and I’ll go and only come back if you call again” Which you will ~Wolfish Grin~
She could not resist anyway. I was large and strong. Her hands were tied to each bedpost and then I splayed her legs and tied each leg to opposite legs of the bed. She was tightly drawn up and out. Her opening was wide open a perfect flower in full bloom to my soft predations. She could hear me unbuckling my belt. She heard the trousers fall, but did not hear me remove his shoes or remove the pants entirely. She concluded that I wished to be nearly ready to bolt in case we were interrupted and that I obviously meant to sex her with my pants on. She squirmed, and let out a gasp as my belt smacked the inside of her thigh. To even things out, I also smacked the inside of the opposite thigh. This stung, but it was hot, red, and so close to her open folds, that it made her strangely enough, want more of this so called unwanted attention.
She felt me lay down on the bed between her legs. My gloved hand on her right thigh, the ungloved hand on her left thigh. A tongue began to caress the soft, inner, tissue of her legs… high up, and very close to her opening. Exactly, in fact, where he had just slapped her with the belt. The tongue felt hot because of the fresh, stinging, skin. It moved in long lashes up the thigh, pausing at the entry to her flower then glided down the opposite thigh. I seemed in no hurry at all and the repeated, wet, licks up and down caused her chest to heave as her respiration rate rose and her heart pounded.
Damn him! She thought. He’s good at this! How many women has he tortured like this? My tongue, (at long last! it seemed to her) touched on her opening and the tip of it was firm as it felt it’s way along the slit up to her clit. It touched her there, gently, and she nearly jumped at the electric sensation of it! He licked more firmly now and she felt a glove on her right breast and his rough hand on her left. His head pushed hard against her opening licking firmly, probing it deeply. Against her will, she shuddered to a violent orgasm, cursing him beneath her breath. She unwillingly cursed me out in the process.
I release a wicked laugh. “Liked that… did you????”
“No!!!” she lied. I pulled myself lengthwise over her body. She felt the bunched trousers as they moved up, over her thighs, over her belly, up to her breasts. She knew that I was hard as my member slid over her breasts and the pendulous weight of it rested there.
“Know what I want next?” I teased.
“Hmnnppphhh…Yes… ” She said under her breath. “You want me to please you by sucking you.”
“Oh yes….” I replied… “But I want MUCH more than that!” My thighs brushed against her face and the insistence of their presence made her aware of the fact that he straddled her and that my member was directly above her lips. She leaned left first, and then right… her tongue darting out and touching the coarse, curly, hairs at the very top of my thighs. She licked my thighs, her tongue trailing along the hairy insides and the smell of my man-scent filling her with desire. My member brushed gently against her lips. The sweet bit of semen dangling from the end slicked her lips with a salty taste of things to come.
The head at the end of my member pressed insistently against her lips and she parted them slowly, but willingly. The rigid member excited her and it’s own level of excitement assured her that her attentions were not wasted! The organ became noticeably harder and fatter with each oral offering. She stretched her mouth to accommodate the dusky expanse and my member expanded exponentially to fill whatever it was offered. I pushed down as my hands reached back and held her thighs firmly. The rigid shaft began to rhythmically sex her mouth as her blindfolded face accepted this new role and, seemingly, relished it! Her tits pointed toward the ceiling and my hands moved from her thighs to her tits as she again became familiar with the gloved/ungloved hands making light play with her anatomy. I tweaked each nipple and my member sexed her mouth brutally seeking a release after over an hour of rough sex-play.
But I was not yet ready! I left her stranded… nude… spread eagle across the bed, tied to the corners, licked, sucked, and everything but violently sexed! She didn’t need a guide dog to guess, blindfolded, what I had in mind next.
She felt me loosen her bonds so that I could re-arrange her body! The position was entirely reversed. Both hands were brought together and then bound to the center of the headboard as her body was switched once again to a face down position. Her ankles were bound to opposite corners of the bed, but not before her knees were individually looped with duct tape, pulled forward and secured. She was now face down, arms up-stretched and tied to the center of the headboard, ankles pulling her legs apart and her knees brought up so that her ass was prominently raised toward the ceiling.
She lay there for many minutes quietly and without incident. She was beginning to wonder if I had tired of these games and left without a trace, when a belt whistled through the dead-air and creased her ass cheeks with a welt that reddened and burned slightly. Again and again it fell, leaving her ass red, hot and her flower petals wet with anticipation of imminent carnal fulfillment. Against all odds, and against her will, she was brought to the edge of a screaming, thrashing, orgasm. She felt me position myself directly behind her and my member now pressed insistently against her blossom.
I pressed the swollen head against the wet fold as it was offered up to me. I pushed very slowly forward, careful, she noted, so as to not hurt her with my entry. It mattered not! She was now finally completely wet and very, very, willing. That she betrayed this did not bother her at this point! It did not exonerate me that she reacted as a sexual being to my supposedly unwanted sexual advances. Biology was, after all, biology! When you cause someone to act out of character, you are, indeed, the villain! My swollen member pressed hard against her opening and entered with no resistance. It slid easily back and forth seeking equilibrium of pleasure with her super-charged libido! Again and again it filled her void with solid man-flesh! Reaching down to grab her hair I rode her fast and hard slamming all I had and saying the three magical words. “cum for me” and then repeated again cum for me Precious. I struck forward with a meat-intensity that caused her to cum over and over, quietly shedding all pretense of withdrawal. I pushed hard, fast, and sexed her with an intensity that she had not ever encountered before! Her hands grasped the knots of her bounds as my member sexed her till I started to gasp, and…. pulling my member out from her wet flower … violently stroked it, bringing the appendage to a frothy finish all over her rear and swollen folds.
My breathing slowed as I slowly and gently removed her binds. She was still collapsed and expected to rest for several minutes. I bent down whispered into her ear and said to her “feel the magic running through you”. “Precious lets use that and go somewhere special, a magical place, a place that holds no time, a land of dreams that can be reached only now in this state of mind”.

I embraced her as we shot out into the mist only to land in the place of her dreams. We can go there often we just need to get into the gnosis state of awareness.

I am a Beast and I am magic but yet I still can surprise her with intimacy.

You only need call and I shall answer your dream.

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Galactic Butterfly

Galactic butterfly, center of my universe

 

 

 

 

your day My night, your night My day

 

 

 

 

Balanced to perfection with dark and light

 

 

 

 

Equal as givers, together become receivers

 

 

 

 

Stars declare us looking back and dreaming forward

 

 

 

 

Water separates yet unites

 

 

 

 

Two parts Mirrored as one

 

 

Completely Conscious in movement and measure

 

 

My Circle of heaven

 

 

 

 

Galactic butterfly, center of My universe

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

In Lak’ech

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Three words and a little bit more

Today has meaning because of you.

Today is the morning that you have been covered in sunlight for my eyes to see.

This day has brought on a little bit more than before.

Through shock and surprise I see you completely.

Today has brought your closer to me…

Today,

I love you a little bit more than yesterday

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testing the wolf

*giggles*

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