Gra Machree

First of all, Heather is faring well at Viera Gray. It’s over a year since she became part of their community. The carers like her. She’s not an angry resident. She still recognises her children and their partners and her grandchildren and me. She also recognises her visitors: Vanessa Bird, Coryn Thompson, Ray Eisenberg, Anne-Marie Jackson, Liz Rands, Lindsey Scotney, Miranda Stearn, Valentina Lallai, Marianne Rutherford.

My health has been problematic. I had kidney stones in January. I did my hamstrings in in March, and they’re still not quite right. In June my right knee gave way; I had a Total Knee Replacement on the 6th of October. That’s been truly hard. I spent my birthday in A&E with Marianne, looking for a possible clot (there wasn’t any). I’m still not there but I am recovering. I’m on a stick outside much of the time but inside I don’t have any mobility aids. The focus of the last ten months has been knees; that will continue until well into the New Year. But every single person I know who has had a knee, or two, replaced has ultimately raved about it. I hope to join them.

I thank my sister, Marianne, who came over from Ottawa during November to help look after me. And a big thank you to Charlie Quigley who came to my aid before I arrived home. My neighbours have been unfailingly helpful: supplying crutches, walking frames, lamps, bedding and inviting me to their parties.

I highly recommend The Clavadel for post-op care, Caremark for home care, Get Strong for physio (I wish I’d absorbed Claire discussing single level care!) and Foot Solutions for footwear. I’d have been lost without their help.

There’s still good news…much is stalled until my knee is sorted…but there’s hope. I’ve joined u3a (thank you Martin Hindley). I’ve joined the Arts Society Richmond (thank you Marie-Therese Keegan) for their monthly lectures, a 15 walk away from me. I’m an IT volunteer with AGE UK Richmond (thank you again Marie-Therese Keegan.) I’m hoping to continue my table tennis coaching with Michele Colt (I am the class dolt and I don’t care). I’m a member of the Avenue Club; I’ve enjoyed their lunches. I like the History Lecture with Alan Hertz. I hope to continue my Strength Training with Stephen Weil . I like the very uncompetitive Table Tennis on Friday afternoons. And I may yet do more activities. I’d like to take more photographs.

Surprisingly, I’ve joined a Church. I’ve not been to Church since the age of 12 and was never interested. Heather was very mistrustful of organised religion. I’m not sure I believe in a deity. But I do believe in Community. And I like the Minister (complete with tats) and the people in the congregation. I’m very slowly starting to learn their names (yes, that’s still a failing). I’ve even started doing the newsletter. Well, somebody has to.

I managed to do a few things despite the knee: I saw Kyoto with Kate. I watched Ziggy’s swimming gala. I visited Mansion House. I went to the Mayor Charity event in Kew with Coryn and listened to a wonderful tree specialist. I watched Ziggy graduate in real-time from his school’s Rugby B to Rugby A. The family went to Center Parcs in April and we’ll go again in May. We had our family autumn birthday celebrations and Heather’s and my 45th wedding anniversary on the 20th of September. I watched a lot of television leading up to my operation (including 273 hour long episodes of Silent Witness) and hardly any since then.

A good friend Torontonian friend of Heather’s, Jane Burton, died in December 2023; she always made us laugh. Steve Campbell, a friend of mine, died suddenly in September; he was Prince Edward County royalty with his County Magazine. And the photographer Martin Parr, has died in December with his dry photo humour.

I’ll be spending Christmas with Jo, Ben, Wilfie, Margie and Bertie in Walthamstow, having seen Heather first. Our family Christmas will be in January as Kate, Pedro and Ziggy are out of the country.

In the meantime it’s two sets of exercises per day, packing ice around my knee a few times, slowly walking Lola around the block twice per day, trying to push myself without doing myself damage, trying to cope around the house what with laundry, putting the bins out, lightbulbs expiring – finding the things I can do and the ones I can’t quite as yet. Boring but necessary.

Here’s to a better New Year for me – and for you.

Heather and John

ps Yes, we do still donate to charity and not the Post Office.

Richmond is the happiest place to live in Great Britain? Probably. 🙂

January is a slow month as we drag ourselves out of Christmas. We saw Elizabeth Wiggans and Steve Knight. And we had a lovely time with both of them.

February we went to Jordan. It’s five hours from London and much of it is south too. I didn’t take all that much notice that it might be colder than London. But it was. 😦 Petra is the show-stopper, of course. But I loved the Roman ruins of Jersash. And Wadi Rum with its connotations of Lawrence of Arabia is impressive.

March? Our annual visit to Centre Parcs, which the grandchildren love for its activities and pool.

April – Maeve Quigley and Daniel Hawkins were wed. And a lovely ceremony it was too. Heather wore her orange dress from our 2015 trip to Hoi An. I wore my 35 year old tuxedo. Because we jolly well could! So there! Special mention to Maeve and Dan’s whippet for being so wonderful.

As for May, over Heather’s birthday, was our big trip: Instanbul to Athens on a Tall Ship. We’d never been to Istanbul – and saw the Blue Mosque and Hagia Sophia. We’d never been to Athens – and saw the Parthenon and its museum. And we’d never been on a cruise let alone on a Tall Ship. Tick, tick and tick. And we were invited to Jane and Paul Gunn’s big day out – my role was as a chauffeur, driving the Knit and Stitchers about.

We had a belated Mother’s Day for Heather in June.

July was Soleine and Richard Scotney’s 10th wedding anniversary. They may be based in Cambodia, Richard may now be a Frenchman, but North Sheen Recreation Ground was their venue. I even took some photographs of them. 🙂

As for August we pootled about. We drove to Bristol and back for lunch to see Paul and Uca Lewis-Smith (fellow Tall Ship travellers). We had a visit from Beth Windeler’s sister. And we went to National Alfa Day in Bicester, just the once.

September was, obviously, Bertie’s second birthday. All our little family trekked to Walthamstow to see Ben’s pizza oven in operation. What a glorious day it was. We’re not often all together. Seeing the cousins together is very special. A weekend or so later we went to see Yvonne Bernstein, sadly without Leo or Nicole, but she’s in good spirits. (Nicole and Yvonne were hidden in WW2.)

We took just over a week out of October to see Calabria, in a very low-key way. We’d never done an “all inclusive” trip, including food and liquor. I think it was a bit claustrophobic. so we might not do that again. But, still, we saw the volcano that is Mount Stromboli and had a couple of nice meals.

Also in October, Anne-Marie Jackson-Purdy (Heather’s very good friend) came to visit. They’d become chums at college and decided to emigrate to Canada in 1972 together. Anne-Marie has stayed in Toronto, in the Beaches, near Kew Gardens (!). She brought her daughter, Mia, and two granddaughters with them. Our families, including kids and grandkids, have stayed close since they were born.

It’s now November, approaching December. We already have our grandchildren’s presents (shh). Christmas beckons. Kate, Pedro, Ziggy and Jo, Ben, Wilfred, Margot and Bertie will spend the day with us. We have a few parties to attend.

January, the ten of us will see Bluey’s Big Play at the Festival Hall. April, we’ll again be at Center Parcs, Elveden Forest, with our children and grandchildren. May, over Heather’s birthday, we’ll be on a Food Tour in Sicily. And we’ll spend time with Kate, Pedro and Ziggy in August in Portugal.

What is there to add? Mostly pure trivia. I tried and failed to install solar panels. I tried and failed to install a heat pump. We finally got our mosaic table from Jordan delivered despite UPS’ best attempts to damage it. (And our thanks to Dancho Tanev for repairing it.) Our greyhound, Lola, has had three operations in the last year and still wants to visit our vet.

And, sadly, Jens Kopp died in September, leaving behind Caroline (Heather’s older sister). He was a big, gentle man who spoke far more English than I speak German. Our kids remember him as “the Cuddle Monster”. We all miss him.

Happy holidays to all,

Heather and John

ps1 the dosh we save on post we spend on charities.

ps2 Heather was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s in June 2019. She has been supported by her family. She no longer remembers how to use her phone or her PC, so please excuse her lack of response. She doesn’t even listen to Radio 4, it was the backdrop to our lives. But we do go on holidays together. She enjoys seeing friends, travelling and trying new foods. We’ve been very appreciative of the help offered by FISH, Crossroads Care, The Avenue Club, AGE UK, Lindsey Scotney, Lindy Hamilton-Beazley, Siobhan Webb, Liz Rands, Gill and John Jones, Coryn Thompson, Pippa and Graham Tarran, Anne-Marie Jackson-Purdy, Elizabeth Wiggans, Uca and Paul Lewis-Smith, Chrissie Jackson, Ray Eisenberg, Steve Knight and John Thorpe (if I’ve missed anyone, I’m very sorry indeed!)

This year has been recovering from the pandemic and hoping the next one isn’t right around the corner.

In January we saw Frozen the Musical with our granddaughter Margot. The Royal Circle was nothing but grandparents and Elsas. So many Elsas!

February was the month to repair Lena. Lena the Lioness was from Heather’s childhood. Her stuffing was worn, her ear was lost and her leg was bent in a peculiar way. Now Lena has pride of place. (Beware the lion puns.)

More lions. In March we saw How to Hide a Lion with Ziggy, our grandson. The Polka Theatre is wonderfully laid out for the 12 and under.

Easter in April was the time for Center Parcs and all the children and grandchildren. We were blessed by the Weather Gods.

Excuse our politics. Look away now. Our local elections were in May. We are lowly deliverers. We were pleased to see our party do well. It isn’t always that way. 😦

May was also our trip to Canada. We went to Anne-Marie Purdy-Jackson’s late husband, Jim, memorial. As a filmmaker he’d have been pleased with the Fox Theatre playing Destiny to Order. We then spent a few days travelling around my family and some of our friends – from London, Ontario to Ottawa and back to Toronto for Chrissie Jackson’s big party. Thank you to my family: Paul, Eric and Marianne – and their spouses: Martha (driving for 10 hours!), Fil and Bob. And thanks to Beth Windeler, Jane Burton and John Anderson for spending time with us.

The Queen’s Jubilee was in June. Wasn’t that enough? 🙂 No cars were allowed on our streets and Ziggy loved the freedom. We visited Coryn Thompson in Shoreham by Sea. We also had the outside of the house painted and our garden rejuvenated, both were crying out for attention.

We met Anne Scorer and Cecil Rowe in Greenwich in July. They were Heather’s Maid of Honour and my Best Man on our wedding day. It was good to see them in such fine fettle. Nancy and Jim Taylor took us around Scarborough.

August was a sad month. We visited Heather’s sister, mother and father’s grave after many years. And then, over the course of a very few days, our wonderful Elmo died – the shock of losing a dog never really leaves one. Seeing the children and grandchildren for a hot barbecue helped, as did seeing Linda Young with whom I share a distant relative.

In September we visited Sardinia. We went on a tour lightly patterned after DH Lawrence. It was a pretty good tour, only marred by 35C+ temperatures for the entire week. But the highlight was meeting up with Valentina Lallai and her mother, Maria, in Oristano. They were delightful, as always. We had a spectacular lunch with Valentina in a back of beyond village.

During October we hosted Anne-Marie Jackson here. She made our house her base whilst she went to Nottingham, Applecross and Menorca to visit her extended family. Seeing her in stages made the visit more special. And we welcomed Lola, our gentle four-year-old rescue greyhound, to our home.

November was my 70th. The kids must have sensed my unease and organised a cook-at-home chef to create a six-course meal for the six of us. It was wonderful.

December? Parties, dinners, a trip to Steam Railways, and a Zoom call with my fellow Systems Designers from the University of Waterloo; did we really graduate in 1976? We converted the AGA to electricity, and made gutter repairs (we know how to live!), Christmas lunch with Kate, Pedro and Ziggy. New Year’s with all our little family including Jo, Ben, Wilfred, Margot and Baby Bertie.

In 2023 we hope to visit Jordan in February. And over Heather’s birthday in May we are aiming to land in Instanbul (which we’ve never seen), depart from Athens (which we’ve never seen) and visit the islands between them on a Tall Ship (which we’ve never done before). Hurray!

All the best to you and yours. Merry Christmas and Happy New Year.

Heather and John

See https://www.flickr.com/photos/gramachree/ for our latest photographs.

On the 16th of January 2021, Ziggy just looked at Kate and said, “a long time ago, when I was coming back to my house from nursery, granny and grandpa came and I was super happy!” Ah, those were the times. Wilfred, Margot and Ziggy have all started proper school.

We’ve not travelled this year. Heather and I have made it as far as Southwold with Jo, Ben, Wilfred and Margot, and Centre Parcs Longleat with Kate, Pedro and Ziggy. We’ve done some day trips to Beaulieu and the New Forest. We have our excuses all lined up, of course. We were in lockdown until June. We were awaiting Jo to have her baby in September. (Hurray for Bertie!) So there just wasn’t much by way of opportunity.

We went to see Christina Jackson in Nottingham for a delicious homemade lunch. We spent an afternoon with Pippa Tarrant. We had dinner with Lindsey Scotney and Tony. Ray and Betsy Eisenberg stayed for a few days. We saw Coryn Thompson at Shoreham on Sea for a great lunch. We had various neighbours, a very few at a time, over during lockdown to share nibbles. Lindy Hamilton-Beazely keeps Heather going to Knit and Stitch. Siobhan Quigley and Martin Rands had special birthdays. We’ve been to Christmas at Kew. We’ve done a few things to keep us busy. And we won a lottery – a meal at Tavolino and tickets to The Book of Dust – thanks to the Orange Tree Theatre.

Next year, we are hoping to see Valentina Lallai, our ex-lodger, in Sardinia, attend a party in Toronto (with side trips in Pennsylvania and southern Ontario), and see Georgia, Armenia and Azerbaijan. Fingers crossed! We’d also like to fit in the painting of our exterior and an overhaul of our now rather tired garden.

Asides? In November of 2021, Dancho Tanvez has moved in as our new lodger. We’ve known Dancho for many years and we think he will fit in well. Elmo adores him, always a good sign. Jo, Ben and Pedro are all in the same roles but Kate has a new job – and she likes it. Bennet Kopp spent a month or so at the Royal Hospital School and he might not have recovered from it yet! Ziggy hero-worships Bennet.

There’s been sadness too. I’d met John Flowers Senior at FAO Rome in 1976 – I was in awe of his massive handshake, his Bostonian accent and his brain – and we liked his wife, Pam and two kids. Thanks to John Junior for the last goodbye. Jim Purdy from Toronto is gone – we’d shared many happy years with Anne-Marie Jackson and their children. Jim Hayat and I had drifted apart – but it hit me still when his daughter contacted me. And the saddest of all, my brother Bill lost a child, Cameron, at 21 years old. Words escape me, I cannot imagine.

I’d like to recommend a book by Robert D Kaplan, Good American: The Epic Life of Bob Gersony, the U.S. Government’s Greatest Humanitarian. We know Tony Jackson and Rose-Marie who played leading roles in Bob’s life. I am humbled by all of them.

And, yes, I am still loving my Alfa Romeo Giulia Lusso Ti. 🙂

All the best to you,
Heather Brach and John Samuel
ps we’ll be distributing electronically as much as possible and sending to the money to charities

The summary? We hope you are as blessed as we have been. We’re fine. Our kids are healthy, have homes, like their jobs (some new) and have terrific partners. In turn, their kids, our grandkids, are, for the most part, delights – we have our days with them most weeks. We have friends to stay, stayed with friends and enjoyed a few holidays. And some of it is photographed.

A few visitors have appeared this year. Gabrielle Must; Betsy and Ray Eisenberg; Noa, Ronit and Gadi Wollstein; Isi, Lars, Lea and Lennart Kopp on their Grand Tour of England and Maria Vallai. It’s always a pleasure to open our house to friends and family – mightily helped if they like big dogs as much as we do. We’ve even met new family – welcome, Linda Young.

Holidays have been had. Heather surprised her sister, Caroline, in Hamburg – appearing on Caroline’s doorstep on the day of her 70th. We’d not seen Dave Nyman since we left Rome in 1978; visiting Laura and him in Valencia for Heather’s birthday was simply terrific. It also gave us a chance to catch up with a GE colleague from 20 years ago, Emilio Fernandez-Martos. What a wonderful city too; I’ve bookmarked a local realtor. We’ve had tours of South Africa and the Orient – and finding the jet lag more difficult than ever. We met Baby Knox in our occasional friends and family circuit around the north-east US and southern Ontario – our apologies to Rohini, Beth, Paul and Martha and others for missing them this time around, Our thanks to our many hosts: Barb and Terry, Ronit and Gadi, Anne-Marie and Jim, and Marianne and Bob.

We have lost a friend and neighbour, Tacchi Salama, this year. And we lost Chris Thompson; my alter-ego through whom I met Heather. Both died far too young. We think of them and their surviving partners, Ben and Louise.

Meanwhile, we continue to deliver leaflets, start petitions, attend the odd rally and host the local LibDem Committee Room during elections. We may be swimming against the national tide but our time will come only if we help it along.

As we have done for many years, we will be sending most of our Seasons Greetings electronically and donating the stationery and postage saved to charity. We hope you don’t mind.

Have a great holiday break.
Heather and John

“Granny and Grandpa’s house is better than telly”, said Wilfie to his parents when told he was spending the weekend at our house. That’s how you know you’re making a reasonable fist of grandparenting. We spend most Wednesdays with Ziggy in Tooting and most second Fridays with Margie and Wilfie in Walthamstow. In between we recuperate. All have their delightful personalities. Wilfred has more empathy than most four year old boys and is wonderful with his baby sister. Ziggy loves Bing, balls, dogs, trains, slides, climbing and ‘nacks (snacks). Margie knows her own mind; she is two going on 13, and oh so charming with it.

It’s taken 20 years but we actually have finished our household to-do list. It is much as we’d hoped. We’d started just over three years ago with windows and bathrooms. We finished with pictures hung and the fence painted. There’ve been some detours on the way. In one month our old fridge, a ceiling fan and our hot water all broke down – but everything was fixed. We also had the odd pleasant surprise; our original living room floor, once sanded, turns out to be walnut. The triangular dining room table is fantastic for conversation at dinner parties. It is a very odd sensation, to awake to no tradesman appointments and an empty to-do list. It leaves more time for grandparenting and holidays.

For years we’d been hoping to go to New Zealand with our friends, Barb and Terry Young. They have their own distractions (a Pennsylvania farm and dispersed grandchildren) so we went on our own, via Singapore, in the spring. We left the day before the Beast from the East in the UK, just missed the worst of the cyclones in New Zealand and arrived back to Kew to glorious weather. New Zealand is wonderful – laid back, efficient, varied and beautiful. We fell in love with Napier and Nelson. The itinerary was pretty full on. As our guide said, “You’re not on holiday you’re on tour.” Despite that, Heather managed to squeeze in meeting up with her university friends, Fatima and Fern, out there. We also had stays in Lanzarote with Ziggy, Kate and Pedro, the Dalmation coast, the Baltic states and the Veneto. Yes, we fitted in yet another trip to Italy for yet another of my birthdays.

There’s been lots of good theatre, exhibitions and cinema. Amadeus was excellent. Hamilton was almost as good as its hype. Pedro and I didn’t come away with any expensive souvenirs from Ferrari. Roger McGough’s poetry reading was unexpectedly, for me, laugh out loud funny. We make a point of going to see pretty well anything at the Orange Tree Theatre; it’s excellent, our front row seats mean we daren’t cross our legs so close are we to the actors and the theatre is a ten minute stroll from the house – what’s not to like? My stand out highlight was Picasso 1932; I was transfixed by many of the images. A photo of his Guernica was my earliest childhood “art” memory but only with this exhibition did I start to appreciate the scope of his work.

Annie and Jim Jackson-Purdy came to visit from Toronto. Ray and Betsy Eisenberg came to visit from Oakland. The Book Club Kate started nearly a decade ago had a reunion. We hosted the Committee Room for the Liberal Democrats in the May council election and we won our ward. As a family we’ve come around to celebrating all the first half of the year birthdays on one weekend and all the second half on another. We have the kids and their kids over and have a chef come in to cook for us all. No one has to worry about cooking or trains and getting back for their babysitters. It’s a great format and we’ve had some fantastic food.

Both Heather and I have had minor health scares. As a result our diet, already pretty healthy, has been transformed. White carbohydrates are a thing of the past. And I no longer add salt to my food. In the scheme of things whilst these seemed dramatic at the time they are actually pretty trivial changes.

On a sadder note I’ve lost some people this year. One of my best bosses, Matt Mulligan of GE in Rockville Maryland, died. One of my finest colleagues, Tom Hammer, of Ventro in Mountain View California, died all too early. Larry Peplowski, my best friend from Park Forest, Illinois has gone. As has Chuck Eggert from British Columbia, a University of Waterloo roommate. I think of them and their families’ loss.

Next year? Well, we have plans. We’re off to South Africa early in the year and China and Japan later. In between we have Adi Wollstein’s wedding in Leesburg. And a trip to Valencia to meet up with Dave Nyman, 40 years after we last met – and Emilio Fernandez-Martos too. That still leaves time for our terrific mutt, Elmo, and the grandkids. And lots of time for visitors too; come, if you’re brave enough.

We try not to dwell on the self-harm of Brexit and its consequences upon our friends and family. Elmo gets his walks and we get our 10,000 steps in every day. In 2019 we’ll have been 40 years in Kew and 20 years in this house; we oft think how privileged we’ve been to live here.

All the best to your and yours for the holidays and beyond.

Heather and John (or Gi and Pa, as Ziggy calls us)