Thirteen

Posted December 5, 2008 by heisrich
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I was having this Y!M conversation with one of my friend in Dijon, France and he told me how marvelous Paris will be tomorrow because there will be marche de noel..yap, annual event to celebrate christmas, and i am sure it will be so gorgeous, as always…in another window i had my ex-manfriend, who now lived in Oslo, also told me how he and his son and his new partner (that scumbag!!) decorate their home for christmas, well, my manfriend doesn’t celebrate christmas but his new partner (that bitch!!) does, and they decided they loved to putting some lights to make their cute-little-home looks shiny bright like their neighbors, then he said “If you can turn back the hands of time to a certain phase in your life, at which age would you go back to?”

When they mentioned about the joy of christmas in Europe, i kinda flashbacked to 9 years ago, i was thirteen, when i had the chance to experienced the beauty of christmas in europe, for exact, in Antwerp, Belgium as an exchanged student…i can still remembered that day, i trackbacked the flat me & my family’s used to lived in, yes i once lived there when i was kid, for around 2 years before headed to Brisbane, and finally moved extensively acrossed Indonesia..i saw the flat we used to lived in, and it was still the same old one..i completely stunned, i left the city for years and when i came back it was still the same, even the christmas ambiance is still the same, eventhough i didn’t celebrate christmas, but there were certain things about weeks-to-christmas that’s beautiful, maybe because it was so serene, the weather was so cold that people gather around to get some warmth together, laughed, then the lights in every house, then the fireplace, then the christmas shopping, then i felt like i’ve seen it all, all the memories form my childhood that had gone away suddenly came back..and that moment, when i was thirteen i felt like that was the first time i learnt to lived independently, to embraced myself, to voiced my thoughts, to valued people, to communicated well with others in different languages and style, and i had my eyes opened to see the world.

That’s the good thing about me being thirteen, the others were, i had my first liplock with a boy when i was thirteen, and maybe that’s the point of i believed i am starting to embraced myself to the fullest..if Katy Perry said she kissed a girl and she liked it, yeah, the same thing happened to me when i was thirteen, i kissed a boy and i liked it…i also had my first alcohol when i was thirteen, yes, it was with the boy i kissed.

When i remembered all those things when i was thirteen, i would like to go back to that moment…i wanted to enjoy every goods and bads i did, i just wanted to enjoyed it, i don’t want to changed it..it was a great year and to experienced all those things just made me realized, despite my flaws, i was blessed.

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Heterophobia

Posted November 30, 2008 by heisrich
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Heterophobia

Buku ini disebut sebagai Macho Man Ngomong Cong #02, masih juga ngomongin Cong (yaiyaaalaaahh, namanya ajah buku cong..hihihihi), specifically the wirter, Fa..sebagian besar tulisan masih diambil dari blog-nya, mostly dari tahun 2006 dan 2007, tapi ada dua tulisan yang berupa remake dan empat tulisan yang unpublished.

Seribu cong, seribu kelakuan (mengutip salah satu judul tulisan Fa)..yak begitulah kira-kira gambaran besar buku ini..menunjukkan kelakuan cong yang direpresentasikan oleh Fa, mulai dari being gym addict, sukses di kerjaan, enjoying sex, nyari pacar, patah hati, coming out, dll..Sejak buku pertama muncul, Macho Man Ngomong Cong, udah terasa aura gay sensibility-nya, pokoknya terkait dengan being gay, harus cerita ke siapa?..ada nggak ya orang kayak gue?..gimana gue ketemu dengan gay lain?..gimana gue harus berkelakuan di depan umum?..gimana gue ngenalin gay lain?..gimana gue have sex?..major questions, yang hanya bisa dijawab dengan “Bergaul deh!!!”..hihihihihi..so, if you’re such a late bloomer, either bergaul dan beredar sesering mungkin atau mengutip istilah di buku ini, Gay-It-Forward..yaa, Gay-It-Forward kalau mau buru-buru banyak tau, naahh untuk mengakomodasi Anda-Anda yang mau Gay-It-Forward, ya buku ini boleh jadi bahan mengenal sedikit lagi bagian dunia gay dan melihat dunia dari gay-perspective, which you’ll realized that actually being gay is just as normal as the normal itself.

Sedikit beda dengan Macho Man Ngomong Cong, Heterophobia hadir lebih fokus dengan pembagian buku menjadi beberapa bagian dengan tiap bagian membawa satu topik besar yang mewakili kumpulan tulisan di dalamnya. Ada 5 bagian di buku ini, personally gue suka Part 3 “Yes I Am Gay! Do You Have Problem With That???” yang menurut gue ga ngebosenin dan fresh dengan adanya 2 tulisan remake & 2 tulisan unpublished..walaupun semuanya juga bagus sih, cuma ya gituh, i’ve read them before..Semuanya masih a lil bit bitchy but witty, satu tulisan yang gue suka adalah “Kenapa Sih Str8 Suka Nyuruh-Nyuruh Cong Kawin?” tentang Fa yang didesak buat menikah oleh salah seorang keluarga jauhnya..Buku ini sangat relatable buat kaum gay jelas..Fa’s shared ideas, thoughts, and experiences gue pikir nyaris serupa dengan most gay everywhere.

Duuuhh nyari bukunya kudu perjuangan deh di Gramedia, buat Anda-Anda yang niat beli, buku ini ga ditemui di bagian novel fiksi even buku baru (yang pas gue beli nih buku didominasi bukunya Andrea Hirata yang baru, duuuhh apa Karpov gitu judulnya)..Kalo mau nyari nih buku, ada di segmen Pengembangan Diri, kalo di Gramedia Matraman, ada di row ke-5 di rak paling bawah, entah kenapa begitu tersembunyi, sampe mbak2 yang gue mintain tolong nyari ga nemu nih buku, thanks to my Basic Cong Instinct, i find this rightaway dengan quick-shelf scanning ajah..hihihi..
hphobia
I just have no idea kenapa diletakkan disitu, bukannya diletakkan di bagian buku baru yang jelas bakal memudahkan untuk dicari..apa mungkin karena ini gay-book jadi masih rada aneh kalau diletakkan jelas-jelas?  or gay still considered as abnormal??well, i dunno..yang jelas kalau mengutip Oscar Wilde

“There is no such thing as a moral or an immoral book. Books are well written or badly written. That is all.”

maka Heterophobia is a well written piece..Jadi congs out there, grab the book ASAP..Str8 juga, baca deh nih buku, biar jadi cong..eehh maksudnya biar membuka wawasan dunia cong..hihihihi..

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i-D January 2009

Posted November 27, 2008 by heisrich
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i-D January 2009 : Eniko Mihalik by Inez & Vinoodh

One word, Gorjezzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Have no idea about the CoverGirl’s tagline, but forget about it, just see the eye patch, c’est magnifique!

id-january-eniko-mihalik-by-inez-vinoodh

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Go Public

Posted November 27, 2008 by heisrich
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Internet goes public, kalau mau browsing, chatting, downloading, sekarang ga perlu ke warnet lagi, cukup main ke tempat yang punya fasilitas public Wi-Fi dan semua itu bisa dilakukan..Maka, gue ga heran lagi saat di mall atau cafe, notebook betebaran dimana-mana.

“Eh, ke Starbucks bentar yuk..gue mau ngecek e-mail gue dulu, kali aja ada e-mail cowok gue”

Saat gue mendengar percakapan itu, gue jadi berpikir, apakah segitu pentingnya ngecek e-mail di area public Wi-Fi?..come on, it’s PUBLIC..bukankah selalu ada kemungkinan terjadi hacking..belum lagi kemungkinan penyebaran virus, afterall, sesuatu yang sifatnya massal bukankah rentan akan berbagai kemungkinan pengrusakan suatu sistem?in this case, sistem di notebook kita..maka saat terjadi hal ini

“Loohh, ini apaan ya?..tadi barusan masuk ke inbox gue, gue klik, laptop gue malah error gini sih?”

Yeah, di salah satu kampus swasta di Jakarta terkenal sering bermain virus lewat public Wi-Fi yang betul-betul dimanfaatkan oleh semua elemen kampus tersebut..hanya saja sometimes, kita kurang notice, akan kemudahan fasilitas publik ini, ada cela-nya juga..saat sudah tahu sedang menggunakan fasilitas public wi-Fi tapi masih juga iseng mengklik segala sesuatu yang diterima langsung dari koneksi Wi-Fi saat itu juga, maka i would say the problem exists between the keyboard and the chair..hihihihihi.

A thing about this whole public thing is don’t go public if it’s not necessary

Himbauan ini juga disampaikan kepada pasangan sesama jenis, when it’s not necessary, do not have a PDA (public-display affection)..because you will never know, who’s gonna track you guys down..maraknya kasus pembunuhan yang menimpa kaum homosexual tentu saja jadi peringatan tersendiri bahwa homoseksualitas masih tabu buat kebanyakan orang ga peduli seberapa majunya zaman, ini nggak akan berubah..maka saat beberapa bulan lalu marak kasus pembunuhan oleh seorang gay bernama Rian yang rupanya didasarkan atas cinta segitiga, lalu terkuak pula kisah si Rian pacar si anu, si anu pernah sama si inu, si inu pernah sama si ina, si ina pernah sama si X, dan seterusnya, gue jadi mikir, everyone goes public!!..jadi selain berbelasungkawa atas para korban, gue juga berpikir bahwa inilah nggak penting-nya go public, satu lagi sistem yang terusak, sistem kehidupan seseorang yang berpengaruh ke sistem-sistem kehidupan lain yang terkait dengan si korban atau si pelaku.

In this case, i assumed, the problem exists between the belly and the tighs, it’s penis..well, penis should have never goes public.

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5 Knuckle Shuffle is The Most Fun A Guy Can Have Without Having To Be Responsible For Pregnancy or Suffer Any Sexual Diseases

Posted November 25, 2008 by heisrich
Categories: provocative
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Me & my-undefined-status-but-my-private-doctor-ex have some hilarious laughs because we imagine what would it be when we’re becoming parents and giving this kind of advice to our son

“Your little body is changing. It’s all good believe me, kid..Problem now is everytime we jerk the gerkhin, we end up with a lot of unwanted, sticky, white stuff everywhere, right?
So first order of business, no more socks, they’re expensive, gumming up the works plumbing-wise..And you may think ‘what do i do with the pearl jam if i can’t spew it into Mr.Sock?’..
Glad you ask..You can have a lovely tugging the tiger in the shower each morning that eliminates the need for a goo-glove. But the day is long, Masturbation is fun. So unless we want to take four or five showers everyday, we’re gonna need some options here..Let’s start with the basics.
Tissues, perfectly acceptable backstop for all that creamy italian. They can be rough and dry on such soft-sensitive skin, not to mention they can stick to your dickhead like a bandaid.
From here we move on to more lubricated flak catchers, specifically bananas. Step one, peel the banana, step two slip the peel over your dick, start pitching now..for extra credit warm up the peel in the microwave, not too hot.
Also olive oil, moisturizer, honey, spit, butter, hair conditioner, and vaseline can also be used for lube. In my opinion, the best lube is lube, so save your allowance, invest in some soon.
Moving on, when you tug your dick on the toilet, shoot right into the bowl. In bed, a soft T-shirt, perhaps a downy hand towel of your very own that you don’t mind tossing after tossing.
There’s no such thing as polishing that raised sceptir of love too much. It reduces stress. It enhances immune function. Also practice makes perfect, right?..So work on your control now, while you’re a solo artist, you’ll be playing some long, happy duets in the future..All right, son, class dismissed.”

Hihihihihihihi…lessons learned, the joy of 5 knuckle shuffle..hehehe..so would we be a cool parents with that kind of advice to our son??..hihihihihihi..thanks to weeds.

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Being Bald

Posted October 22, 2008 by heisrich
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Monday, October 20th 2008

Barbershop At Menteng, two guys sat next to each other while the hair stylists cut their hair

Very cute-gym-build-body-guy : Emang kemarin pas lebaran liburan kemana?

Very mild-manner-beeyotch : Ya, mutar, seperti biasa, Surabaya-Makassar

Very cute-gym-build-body-guy : Enak ya..ke Makassar..ga sekalian ke Medan kan dekat juga.

Very mild-manner-beeyotch : *$#@@!%#$@@&*#!*&$ *mumble* Makassar di mana Medan di mana

All of a sudden the Very-mild-manner-beeyotch didn’t seem to interest to the Very cute-gym-build-body-guy, even with a very Massimo Dutti-ish style & a scent of Euphoria Man can’t cover that he is not smart enough..Very cute-gym-build-body-guy, CORET!!!…dizzied by that comment, Very mild-manner-beeyotch decided to

Very mild-manner-beeyotch : *to the hairstylist* Mas, saya dibotakin ajah, ga plontos tapinya ya

Ga nyambung sih ya..hihihihihihihihihihihihihihihi

There he is, all new look, Very mild-manner-beeyotch is now bald..He’s being bald but still bold.

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Bencoooonggg!!!

Posted October 17, 2008 by heisrich
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This week, for me, is a week full of feuds and frauds..yeahhh, so crowded that i kept repeating ‘Bencoooong!!’ everytime i got dizzily mad.

I was having dinner with my friends, two gay guys, on a food stall in Salemba, 8 PM..while gossiping (i prefer to said it’s gossiping since ‘gossip’ seems to be a more popular yet glamorous word than ‘chat’ or ‘talk’) and eating of course, two trannies buzz in right to the front of our table, Tranny # 1 sang a dangdut karaoke while Tranny # 2 shook his body and danced through with strippa-ish moves..We kept gossiping and ignored the trannies, and all of a sudden Tranny # 2 can’t had enough so he toss away my friend’s orange juice and he start yelling in his most ngondek’tune while the tranny also burnt with anger as well (maybe he got his period..hihihihihi)

“ehhhh..kurang ajar ya loooo” * friend in ngondek tune*
“iiiiihhh..bencong jugaaaa..ehhh hargain orang nyanyi donkkkk..nyari duit nih tcongggg!!” *in more-ngondek tune*
“bencong nista loo..udah sana jauh ke taman lawang” *in ngondek tune, ready to tossed the ice in his glass*

Next thing i know, Tranny # 1 jumped in and tossed his kecrekan to my friend while me & the other friend yelled in such a ‘ngondek’ way..then my friend tossed the ice and the full glass of water to both trannies..luckily the staffs in the food stall buzz in and dragged the trannies out while they kept yelling

“dasarrrr, bencong munaaaaaaa…awas lo yaaaa” *in the most-ngondek tune i ever heard in my life*

The feud caused attention from the surroundings, some giggled, some laughed out loud, some scared..yeahh, it’s very rare to find Congfight in the public, yeah, that was fit into Fa’s term ‘bencong teriak bencong’..having seen the trannies dragged out, i calmly mumbled

“Bencong!!!”

Then in a cyber-life, the feud about some frauds continued, some tried to manipulate, some feel offended, some feel the urge to gave unimportant comment, bottom line is, it’s more to a nerve-feud..out of the feud i heard someone talked bad about me, yeeeeeaaahh, like it’s the very first time, d’oohh??

“Bencoooooooonng!!”

I’ve stated clearly and out loud

“I don’t dissin’ someone on the internet, if people wanted to fight me, let’s get down and dirty face to face and i’ll show you how a biatch really smacked people down”

and yet, the feud still continue and the more i saw it, the more i find it disgusting, especially with some fake ones who kept brought the feud, talk trashes with the words full of ‘animal’ stuff to some people i know, but didn’t showed the true face yet..puh-leaseeeee, spare me the drama!!..i furiously yelled

“Bencoooooooooonngggg!!!”

The B word still continue through the week

Internet in my residence had errors, every night, i kept complaining but no progress yet

“Bencoooooonngg!!”

I planned a ‘Curhat Buat Sahabat’ scene with Aa after we both having a movie marathon at Blitz til midnight, but then right after we arrived at Olala Thamrin, his boyfriend called asking to picked him up..so gone are my ‘Curhat Buat Sahabat’ scene..damn, that tjong!!

“Bencooooooonngg!!”

My boss asked this completely perfect proposal (in my POV) need to be revised, had the budget recalculated and had it translated to english and had me time to did all that just one day.

“Bencooooooonngg!!”

This morning, i went out for some breakfast, crossed rue de centre Salemba i got hit by bajaj

“Bencooooooonngg!!”

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10.365

Posted October 13, 2008 by heisrich
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Rp 10.365..that’s the current value of IDR on USD per 13-10-2008..wow, i kinda get the vibe of monetary crisis part 2..my mom already warned me to manage my expenses and tightening the budget plan for next month..and there’s this info about Rihanna is about to come for her concert on November 14th, Oh my God, how will i resist that??!!while i know the ticket will be insanely expensive consider her current massive popularity..and there’s this upcoming Ashanti’s special show in Soulnation which ticket i have booked days ago..and i need to extend my rapidshare account for the next 6 months..and i have arranged a trip to Gili Trawangan on late November..and i am longing for Paco Rabanne 1 Million…those things will cost me a lot..d’ooohhhhhhhh…

Damn, i want those things, but it seems so not wise for me to spent that lots of money to fulfill my insatiable-needs-for-hedonistic-stuffs while i just got a call from my ex house mate back in the day i was in college said that our maid had a serious post-op bleeding after gave birth to her first newborn baby..she was really poor and her husband is in jail..some friends already helped a little but that can only covered the medication for a week not the whole administration fee, including the surgery and baby-care..i seriously need to reset my budgeting this month and i do think

Gili Trawangan can wait (i can ask my future man-friend to take me there, Amiinn),

so does Rihanna (i can still catch her later, when she finally had her career stucked and come with more affordable-price concert a la MiMi’s Charmbracelet concert in Jakarta back in 2004..hihihihihi),

so does Paco Rabanne 1 Million (i can wait for someone who is willing to give me this in my upcoming birthday..hihihihi)..

huhuhuhuhu..The fluctuation of currency rate will definitely had impacts not only on my hedonistic-needs but more importantly on my maid’s health and her newborn baby..i kept thinking on how this unfortunate event causing misfortunes to the unfortunates.

And there are those who extensively travel around the world and keep bragging about that as if global crisis had no impact on them, yeahhhhh!!!..

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Rectoverso : A Reflective Story-Telling

Posted September 24, 2008 by heisrich
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Taken from my review column in my other personal site, here’s Rectoverso

Been a huge fan of Dewi Lestari since i was in high school, since Supernova: Ksatria, Putri & Bintang Jatuh that’s when i fell in love on how a fiction can be scientifically romantic (represented by Ferre & Rana), scientifically radical (represented by Diva) and scientifically gay..hehehehe..(represented by Dimas & Ruben). Since then i read Dewi Lestari’s books religiously.

Here comes Rectoverso, a very unique concept of story-telling, the stories were told in fictions & songs where you’ll find out how both fiction & song is the each other’s reflection, that’s why it named ‘Rectoverso’..I purchased this book from the official Rectoverso site at a reasonable price for a good stuffs you’ll get.and the special edition finally came last week.

Let me talk about the music first, they are all awesome…very relatable yet sometimes most of the songs felt brutally romantic, cut you to bleed and you can’t avoid to shed a little tears, this can only happened when you really felt the similarities between the lyrics & your very own stories..hihihihi..Killer tracks in the CD are

1. Curhat Buat Sahabat with one-i-thought-is-a-killer-line ‘Diam, duduk di tempatku menanti seorang yang biasa saja..segelas air ditangannya, kala ku terbaring sakit..’

2. Malaikat Juga Tahu which i think the best local song throughout this year, even in years, in my opinion..A very great lyric, i just keep amazed on how this song is just Wonderful, capital W.

3. Aku Ada..i couldn’t ask for more incredibly romantic song than this.

4. Peluk..once again i wanna emphasize here, it’s not because of Aqi that i fell in love with the song..hihihihi..but i think we have to admit that the duo just awesome, there’s some extra special with Aqi’s sultry voice which i love..hehehe

5. Cicak Di Dinding which early on i didn’t realize how great the lyric is just because of the title, but then it turned out to be poetically romantic

6. Back To Heaven’s Light, it’s just i have certain experience related to the lyric, so it’s special for me.

The other 5 tracks are also excellent, it’s just i prefer those 6 i’ve mentioned.

——————————————————————————————–

And now the books, i’ve read it three times, and still it gave me chill on some stories..There are 11 super awesome stories in the book but i have to admit that i am so impressed to

1. Hanya Isyarat, read this at the same time you listening to the song, and it will give you the perfect ambiance, i feel like i really am into the story, i am on the story and i feel like i am on a Buddha Bar at Paris..but that’s not just the main reason i am so ecstatic to the story, it’s because of the words, i am all about words so when i am into the story then i found this line ‘..Aku hanya ingin kembali ke tempatku, di belakang sana. Menikmati apa yang ku sanggup. Bukan di meja ini, bukan di sebelahnya…’, that’s when i decide this is the best of the whole 11 stories.

2. Aku Ada..the song just incredibly romantic so does the story..and the story concluded in a sweet line ‘..Cinta adalah aku, cinta adalah engkau, cinta adalah dia, dan cinta tak pernah mati..’

3. Curhat Buat Sahabat, this is a story you’ll finish real fast, it’s short but in the end as you read ‘Sebotol mahal anggur putih ada di depan matamu, tapi kamu tak pernah tahu. Kamu terus menanti. Segelas air putih’ you’ll read it over and over again..OMG don’t you just love this kind of ending?? *garuk-garuk aspal mode on*

4. Grow A Day Older..It’s an interesting story, about giving a birthday present and ‘i-love-you-statement’ in disguise to someone..Written in english with a catchy line ‘For me, a perfect chocolate bar should be bitter sweet, not all sweet, and certainly not all bitter, for then you lose all the fun.’..didn’t that was an awakening?..well, not really an awakening, perhaps we all realize that but we prefer the sweet and escape the bitter, didn’t we?..the story also gave me an awakening on how to handle a ‘just-go-with-the-flow-advice’, well next time if someone give me that kind of advice i would directly slammed him/her..hihihihi..why?..read the story and you’ll find it out on the last paragraph.

5. Malaikat Juga Tahu..at first i was expecting a common boy-girl love thing with a little twist. Having read the story i was amazed on how this boy-girl love thing turned out to be so different, read it yourself..then as you find out this line ‘Cintanya adalah paket air mata, keringat, dan dedikasi untuk merangkai jutaan hal kecil agar dunia ini menjadi tempat yang indah dan masuk akal bagi seseorang. Bukan baginya. Cintanya tak punya cukup waktu bagi dirinya sendiri’, you’ll know why it was titled ‘Malaikat Juga Tahu’.

Those 5 are my favorite stories of all 11 excellent stories..the book also featured some illustrations and several stunning photographs integrated to the stories, like in ‘Aku Ada’, ‘Firasat’, ‘Peluk’, and ‘Hanya Isyarat’.

Grab Rectoverso now, both CD and book, it’s a must have item in 2008…As for Dewi Lestari, i am still religiously waiting for the next Supernova.

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Saipul Jamil-esque

Posted September 17, 2008 by heisrich
Categories: provocative
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This is not a post about Saipul Jamil, just a post that inspired by him, well in certain ways.hehehe

I remember watched infotainment one day and there was a feature about Saipul Jamil missing her girl, the woman he loved who happened to be on another country..The next day i saw another infotainment which also featured the same ‘Saipul Jamil longing for his girlfriend’ story..Let’s fast forward to couple weeks later; I, who keep maintain good relationship with my ex-es, all of a sudden heard each and every one of them said or wrote a ‘Saipul Jamil longing for his lover’ comment, well, kinda.

ex #1
“Duuhh nyesal banget putus sama R**n..kangen banget..dia udah ga di bandung, i really wanna tell him how sorry i am”

(me mumblin’)..Yeahhhhh, go told this to your friggin boyfriend, damn you are so Saipul Jamil

ex #2
“He’s already in Oslo, he will helped me there, prepared everything, we both will live together, Gosh, i miss him already, his doe-eyes always made me tingly, you know that right?..it should be you i married on january, we’ve heard about then new rule in Oslo January 2009 right?, but anyway, we’re old flame, it’s him the one i had now, Oohh, i am so in love”

(me mumblin’)..I don’t give a damn on the doe-eyes lad, i don’t give a f**k on the new rules of marriage there..you’re just another Saipul Jamil-esque

ex #3
“Kami mau liburan Milan-Paris tanggal 20..ga sabar ketemu sama dia”

(me mumblin’)..Another ex turned Saipul Jamil? Oh God, i need a rest here

What they did were perfectly understandable, they’re in love..When you’re in love sometimes you just look so radiant and all you need is to tell the world that you’re perfectly in love..i really understand that..It’s not that i hate they’re in love, i even gladly talked to them even if they talked about their lover, because i thought i would be happy when they’re happy.

But i was wrong, well i feel happy when they’re happy, yes, correct, but the issue i had here is jealousy, it’s all come to mind..but i just couldn’t avoid talk to them without talk about their current lover, so i need to made an amend to the ‘talking to you ex lover about your current lover’ rules which need to be specifically re-defined especially the chapter ‘Talk about current romance to the old flame’

So i began to draw a line..a line that i defined as ‘jealousy tolerant’ line..Jealousy tolerant is the limit of the amount of jealousy you can take from your ex-lover’s craps about the his/her current romance..what to tolerate??

1. When he/she mentioned his/her current lover..tolerable, check.
2. when he/she talked about how they finally be a couple…tolerable, check.
3. when he/she talked about how nice the current lover is…tolerable, check.
4. when he/she talked about how he/she always longing for the current lover…less tolerable.
5. when he/she constantly said that the current lover is the greatest love he/she had …less and less tolerable
6. when he/she talked about having a future planned with the current lover…this is exactly the limit of my ‘jealousy tolerant’ line, this is intolerable.
7. when he/she talked about them having sex/making love/f**k each other or whatever that was in any languages or terms that defined such activity…ENOUGH!!!! ‘jealousy tolerant’ line already been crossed.

What happened when your ex-es crossed the ‘jealousy tolerant’ line??..me myself, i am gonna be disturbed on everything related to this couple, it’s like i am ready to slamdunk-ed them, i am ready to smacked them down each time i had a chance..i used to did this, but i realize that it’s no classy.

Since i am a classy creature (always have, always will..hehehe), when the ‘jealousy tolerant’ line being crossed i will calmly stated

“Oh, good…my best wishes for both of you..i will be happy when you’re happy, selama kamu bahagia dengan yang sekarang aku akan mendoakan semoga terus diberi yang terbaik dari hubungan kalian”

Well, i couldn’t believe i said this but i felt like that statement was a statement a la Dewi Persik after divorced? hahahahahahaha.

In the end, i realized that the ‘jealousy tolerant’ line will just caused me dizzied by constant innuendo of jealousy in head, which that’s what i am trying to escape from….so, please do not having that statement misinterpreted as jealousy in disguise, because, it’s pure, from the heart, and i really meant it.

Logically speaking, when the ‘jealousy tolerant’ line being crossed there are certain area that still caused you pains until you said ‘ENOUGH!!’, but mostly, behind the line, there is an area i called ‘numb-grey’, the area that makes you numb and being in between..it’s a transition area..at certain moment being ‘numb-grey’ is the best thing to do, especially when you’re in accepting-the-reality-phase..i believed this is the one that keep me sane from my Saipul Jamil-esque ex-lovers..hahahahahaha.

xoxo

RiRi

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