something to rely on.

I just go this flash of epiphany/flash while working on a tight deadline. My Spotify was shuffling and it played a song by Keane, which I had little interest when I was younger. But I remembered that one of my cousins used to play that song all the time and I kept thinking that those are simpler times. Look at me, talking like an old bitter fool but I think it has been more that 12 years since that day and I’m craving something that I no longer can have or go back to. I didn’t understand when I was younger, why my parents, especially my dad had a hard time liking newer songs. I think it’s more of the sense of nostalgia a certain song carries than the musicality of the song itself. It’s really in itself something that people can rely on. In an ever-changing world where you can’t really hold on to something these songs are would still be the same; the melodies, the memories and the feelings behind them.

My schedule has been pretty tough lately. I’ve been trying to juggle many things at once and try to keep everything balanced as humanly possible. But all this multitasking with this ADD I have have proven that you’re gonna fall of balance sooner or later.

I have until the end of the month to really prove to myself that I can do this. It will be a massive hurdle and I know that the odds are against me but this is do or die, sink or swim. Tomorrow is another day to stand up and fight. Let’s fucking do this! #goodnight #youbettawerk

View on Path

“If you don’t have ADD today, you’re not paying attention.”

I totally can relate to this video. FOMO and the endless signals fighting for our attention could be deafening at times. As usual, Jason Silva is being a utopian, but this regard I’m with him. There should be a future where technology could help us navigate through the limitless choices so our mind would not be consumed by them. To push things further, maybe in the future humans could tweak ourselves and “redesign” our capacity to handle a myriad of information.

The future will come sooner than we think and it’s gonna be exciting.

View on Path

“The Zahir, in Arabic, means visible, present, incapable of going unnoticed. It is someone or something which, once we have come into contact with them or it, gradually occupies our every thought, until we can think of nothing else. This can be considered either a state of holiness or madness.”

From 1998 to 2014 my Zahir was L’Arc~en~Ciel. I must say that it’s a bit daunting now that they no longer occupy my mind like they used to. It’s like having something that is rooted deep within you being pulled out and you don’t know what to do with the gaping hole. You actually have some space, some sense freedom and relieve that you never know you could have. The thing is… I never knew freedom and relieve could be so suffocating.

Good night.

View on Path

For a magazine called ‘Puan Pertiwi’ (roughly translates at Indonesian Ladies) with a tag line of ‘Suara, semangat & peran perempuan’ (women’s voice, spirit and role), you would think that this magazine would have inspiring articles for Indonesian women. But, noooo… The headline was on how to lure in rich foreign husbands as if that is the ultimate goal for Indonesian women. If this magazine is voicing the spirit and role of Indonesian women, I would like to see the source of the voice gagged.

View on Path