BLOG- johnhb

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DATE: 11 August 2017

Having not posted for some time I nevertheless feel in the mood for blogging on a regular basis to get it out of my system. I guess I shouldn’t feel so angry- but it’s hard not to when faced with continual blocks and walls, and the antidote may be simply putting pen to paper as it were. I feel comfortable blogging on a daily basis as a means of staying on top of whatever is happening for me.

I drive for a living and therefore have a lot of time for thinking. Listening to talk-back radio also means I hear lots of opinions- some of which I agree with and some of which I don’t. The thought just popped into my head that blogging is a means of “soaking up” some of these thoughts and ideas. Putting it into a blog could mean that I can share these thoughts with others and establish a “presence” of sorts.

Speaking of which, I’ve found a wonderful site called Big White Wall (BWW) (https://www.bigwhitewall.com/). Also, a site https://bizhub.anz.co.nz/workshops/about-workshops.aspx which may help me focus on starting a small business. I am however becoming progressively skeptical about the BWW which now looks like it will only give six months before charging- which may in fact be why it is not more widespread (i.e. waiting to see the uptake and before working out a funding model?)

Have also decided to go with the “keep it simple” suggestion and download Firefox.. as a browser.

It would also be therapeutic- in that there is value on articulating what I’m thinking.

I’ve just purchased a new cartridge for my nifty Brother label maker!!

It’s been a while since I last installed a cartridge. I can’t actually recall when I bought it but I think the cartridge in it has been there since purchase many moons ago. This current cartridge cost me $29.99 and at 8m, is twice as long as the previous one. For the record, that’s 8 m for $30.

This compares unfavourably with the previous four meter cartridge. Perhaps of greater import however is that a new machine with two cartridges would only cost me $60! Therefore it seems it’s more economical /worthwhile to buy a new machine rather than replace the cartridges? Ludicrous, and exploitative I think.

This might seem academic however I today had coffee with a South African friend, who is driven by his need to be employed as a manager in an overseas bank with a presence in New Zealand. It seems this cost him his marriage, and put him under extreme stress. I did not get the opportunity of sharing the fact that I am working as a driver on $20 an hour, but I should imagine that pales in significance compared to his income. Our troubles are relative..

This speaks to the inhumane nature of life in ‘New-Zealand- as-we-want-it’..

Overall, my friend says he came to this country to get away from the negative social aspects of living in South Africa, however I wonder whether he has simply brought them with him? He is a very nice person but… I believe will have difficulty living in the current situation of putting boundaries around his workload, and separating it from his private life. He will continue probably until he finds himself mired in heart attack territory.

So what exactly is the quality of the blog that I’m after. Is it simply an account of my daily activities? Or is it more about monetising a particular process. It’s probably actually a combination of two.
I need a venue to discuss what I believe to be serious issues and to spread my thoughts about whatever those issues may involve. This is primarily to raise people’s awareness of what’s happening around them, and increase their ability to investigate and ascertain the truth behind a lot of what’s happening at the moment.
It looks like I’m going to have less of a role in organising the trip to Hawaii. I find this frustrating because I really want to get my teeth sunk into investigating options over there and making contact with various people and to develop a process of actualising my abilities to maintain a travel set up.

I’ve decided that if I can’t bring about specific social change to accommodate my needs, the next best thing is to record my thoughts as a blog, at least getting it out of my system.

Not sure whether this site is confidential- probably not. Have decided I need somewhere to record my thoughts on various subjects, given that with many of them I just have to live with the fact there is unlikely to be any resolution. Take employment as an example. I haven’t ..worked now for what seems like a year plus. I tell myself I’ve ‘retired’ which has become a euphemism for the fact that I may now be unemployable. The work I am doing amounts to nothing more then makepiece work. I’m grossly under-employed in my opinion.

I can attribute that to many things; including health, my age, state of the economy, etc. etc. The fact is that I’m not doing what I want to be doing.
I often feel resentful that I’ve spent my life getting qualified only to end up driving a van. It’s not what I want to do.

The question is than what do I want to do? I have already gone out on my own to become a solitary counsellor, but that seems fraught with barriers and difficulties. Nevertheless, I have initiated the process at least, by designing in having printed a poster and some smaller versions.what remains is for me to get postcard size versions to distribute to specific locations so I can engage in counselling.

The first issue is how and where to post on this blog. Tumblr comes to mind as a good place to get feedback from interested persons. Ditto  Pinterest. The title would be as follows: WhyWhyWhy asking as series of single questions to get a response.

Memo: draft this on Word (has autocorrect unlike on the WordPress site) then cut and paste it into this blog. Be disciplined about blogging: daily- and on the iPad if possible so I can sit upstairs and record my thoughts.

WHAT FOLLOWS IS A PREVIOUS ENTRY..

The absence or otherwise of money is significant if I let it be. The question arises: How do others monetise their writing? For example, Pinterest has a lot of people writing in a way that is strikingly similar, almost as if it’s been written by the same person?

I intend using this blog to document my thoughts around my current circumstances. Being @@@@@@ to help me control my thinking also produces a “cotton wool” – buffering effect which inhibits my spontaneity. To compare is to lose. The challenge is to actualise my potential, and to monetise it.

I believe also that creative expression is important in everyone’s life. Notwithstanding other interventions in my life, I nevertheless however need to express myself in writing. So here goes.

Chapter 1.

In the beginning was… I constantly compare myself to others whether in terms of money, position or other circumstances. I’m unsure what I get out of this – I think that it is probably not in my best interest – but I continue with it often on an unconscious basis. Learning to live with, and accept myself one day at a time I believe is the answer. I also believe that this fact is either unknown or ignored by most people. It’s stating the obvious to say that the only thing that exists in the universe is right now. Time is relative as are all things in the universe.

So how to translate this into everyday life is the challenge?

Memo to self: locate a handheld Dictaphone to use or set the phone up to do this instead.

Checking our Tumblr each day comes up with surprises. The juxtaposition of Jewish ghetto fighters armed to the teeth, with close ups of a flower or some other equally innocuous object is unusual. The close-ups of silent film stars who are absolutely beautiful along with the tendency to colourise black and white photos gives a unique perspective too.

The attractiveness of these photos is the thoroughly unusual nature of the medium that provides a novelty, a quirkiness that I haven’t seen before and which provides a notable impact.