As an Uber and Lyft driver I’m exposed to a good many people and during my off days when I felt the worst, I kept thinking maybe I’d contracted something from one of my passengers.
One one occasion, I had a passenger I’d picked up from a trip to London call me a few days later to let me know she had Covid. I waited a few days, didn’t drive and waited to get tested. By then, I was feeling kind of puny, but two tests later, (better safe than sorry and to be sure), my tests came out negative. It could be anything.
Well, maybe not. I had been so tired and sleepy of late, that I reasoned it was the change of weather. The weather has been gloomy and rainy and I wasn’t venturing out. I don’t drive in bad weather in a state where the average driver is unaccustomed to handling it. So, I’d been staying in a lot more than usual.
The other morning as I laid in bed pondering whether or not to get up just yet, I dozed off. Suddenly an alarm went off. I was startled awake. It wasn’t the fire alarm, I knew that. Moments before even, in a groggy state, I’d asked the husband to shake out the toaster because the burnt crumbs was aggravating and smelled awful. Huh! Even half asleep I noticed something. Even then, I tried hard to detect smoke but that wasn’t it. So… I get up and hunt down the annoying alarm. It was flashing red and I had to get my glasses to read what it was saying, which was, “Get fresh air”. Wow!
Huh! I opened all the doors and windows and went outside. I realized then, my breathing had been impaired and I was nauseous. I went back in to locate the source.. I turned off the gas to the heater and called the gas and electric company but they were not open for the day. “Call back in two hours”, it tells me.
Hubby had already left for work. He’s the one who suggested turning off the gas. I left a message at the non emergency fire department number. They would get back to me four hours later. lol
Two things and to show how faulty my brain was working was… 1. One of my brothers works for the gas and electric company. 2. My other brother had been a paramedic with the fire department!!! I didn’t think of either. Brother two asked why didn’t I call 911? He said that would qualify as an emergency and they would have also checked my blood for Co2 poisoning, right there on the spot. I told him, I didn’t want to bother if it was a non issue.
Taking it a step further, when the heating and air guy came out to check it, I discovered the source of the problem and… he showed me all these fried wires!!! Not only was there leakage, but they were the result of flames of the furnace having left their designated space and fried the wires.
I looked at him and back at the wires and calmly state, “so in essence I was sitting on a time bomb” and he says, “yeah, sort of”. SunnavaB!
Brother three wanted me to get my blood tested and so did number two brother. I never told number one brother about it, but I’m sure he would have concurred. In any case, I asked the doctor and he said, “oh that will leach out on its own and a blood test isn’t necessary despite my age, which was why the brothers wanted the checkup. So, the following day when I talked to the doctor, I felt fairly okay, the nausea and headache had past and I even went for a walk.
That evening, I suddenly began having trouble breathing. My chest hurt and I kept bouncing in and out of bed unable to sleep and afraid that if I did I wouldn’t wake up the next day. I have felt like crap since, but I think I’m finally getting over it. I never went in for the blood tests because it was still raining and I didn’t have the energy to venture out. It had been a groggy week! It ended up taking over a month to feel normal again.
The guy that came out and checked the furnace turned everything off related to it and also checked all my other gas sources. I’ve still left some windows open and it’s colder than you know what. I’m in southern California, but it’s been unseasonably cold this year already. We don’t get this cold til January or late December. So, we got a new furnace ten days later the following week. In the meantime, it was warmer outside than inside during the day, so a good time to stay outdoors.
Why didn’t it affect the husband? Two explainable reasons. One. He’s twice my size. Two. He’s seldom home. I am here alone pretty much all the time, which is why I drive. That’s my company and entertainment.
I’m much better now, but I just want to remind everyone who lives in colder climes to be sure and have your furnace inspected and be safe.
Today, the husband took me out for breakfast and we walked the beach before he goes off again. It was a beautiful morning and I got some cool pics.
Right?
In case you’re wondering- some of my posts will be catch up writings that I somehow failed to launch. Enjoy!
PS – I know I lost a good number of my usual followers- so I thank you all who came back. in that time some things had changed on the app and I’ve had trouble responding to comments. So, I’m letting you know ahead of time. Cheers!
It’s a line my sister used on me once when I made some inane comment. Inane to her and in retrospect I remember it infuriating me. I don’t recall what we were arguing about because it happened so long ago, but that line stuck with me.
We live in an era where people are spewing half baked ideas all the time. How many times have you heard someone obviously parroting stupidity because they think something someone they hold in high esteem has said it or may have it or said that someone in the past said it. Now, whether true, realistic, verifiable or not if it just so happens to fit in that niche that just happens to be inappropriate by today’s woke gauge, the sayer will be impaled and hung out to dry. Words can be taken out of context and the executioner will have destroyed a life.
When I hear such blanket statements that do no one any good, I don’t bother to comeback with my sister’s favorite quote, but opt for silence or exclusion from the conversation.
Why anyone feels the need to repeat such drivel is beyond me, but they do. The truth is almost everyone does it and sadly moi included. Yes, I’ve done it.
It’s human nature to pick and choose what to believe when they (we) hear it. It doesn’t have to be true. It only needs to verify and support what we believe or is in alignment with our own beliefs.
Sometimes, in an effort to be informed, we search. If it resonates with us, we accept it, true or not. We reason, that this or that makes sense to us but in so doing, we fail to accept or, I should say, take into account personal experiences. Everything in life is colored by our own history and surprisingly that of our ancestors.
Like it or not, how they lived or survived is in our genes and influenced by their answers. You may ask how can that be? Think about it. Our parents responses as well as their parents dialogue and responses affected them and passed on to us and ours to our children. Yes, we may choose to respond differently in the future but it still had an effect. Our fears, our loves carry over into everything we do, say or witness.
I think by and large, we are all getting a little tired of all these so called “authorities” making efforts to convince us of this, that or another because our gut will override what we refuse to accept.
Several of my fellow bloggers have been hitting walls with school indoctrination, teachers and peers influencing our children both morally and politically. This will carry over to future generations. Some will be smart enough to observe and listen to that gut. Others will be swayed and tossed about. They may have a gut reaction but like their ancestors they will allow the stronger ones to control and move their lives, like it or not.
Some will say, no, that’s not right and maybe even pose arguments yay or nay to refute a particular stance and yet do nothing and end up just going with the flow.
Wasn’t there a song, years ago …
By Aaron Tippin
In this day and age of social media, so much inaccurate information gets regurgitated that it’s hard to discern fact from fiction. Where and how do you find reliable sources for accurate information? Many times I’ve been challenged by someone, who asks me, where did you get that information. My preferential response is always, “personal experience” or through eyewitness accounts. When I deem necessary to say, “I read it somewhere” but fail to giving a reliable resource, I’m left feeling pretty stupid.
I was never good at debating to begin with so instead I try to live by the saying daddy once taught me, “it is sometimes best to remain silent and be thought a fool, than to open one’s mouth and remove all doubt”.
I hate to bring this up and I hope my writing about it doesn’t cause more problems.
Did you know that sites with the word “porn” or “sex” in them will generate tons of unwanted solicitations? Add to that other words that can relate to that but have other uses. “Nasty” comes to mind, I use that word all the time instead of dirty or messy when it’s very bad. Then any word relating to body parts and there ya go. You can’t win!!
You may only hit something accidentally and get bombarded.
I’ve been slammed and because my name is listed as “Jo”, they are all from women claiming they are my perfect match … or soliciting male enhancement or remedies for erectile dysfunction. Who’d a thunk it?
Maybe all you did was look up nightlife hotspots for that novel or in my case screenplay scene I’m working on. Yeah, I get that I may be more vulnerable. I don’t have to like it.
In a day, I will wake up to find 50 -60, “call me” messages , ” I sent you my private album” or “check out my photos” in my junk mailbox, which I empty every day, first thing in the morning. I guess these “chickies” work “nights”.
Unfortunately, my blog post follows and comments and other important messages manage to go to “junk” as well, so I have to check it. It had tapered off for awhile, but I think one of the blogs I follow took the summer off. It may not be a blog per se but a pun or something said, tongue in cheek that was picked up. I know there’s a computer term for it, words that the internet taps into, certain key words which it collects plus the info of anyone who follows or landed there, then bombards them with suggestive emails. I don’t know.
I don’t open these because fortunately the tag line tells you enough to know what it’s about. I mean, come on,” “full view photos of me” tells you plenty. I mentioned this to my nephew who is a computer tech nerd and he laughed. He calls them “dating sites”. Gross! They are “phishing”, but why waste their time “fishing” in my pond? Not to mention a waste of my time, I care less about theirs.
As I said, it tapered off for awhile and then lately began to pick up again around the holidays. I guess the holidays brings out the lonely people.
I don’t know, but it is disturbing.
If it’s not from someone I know I know, it goes in the trash.
OH NO!!!
So, guess what? Now, they are using my friends names to get me to open them.
I get it. I wanted a holiday job for something to do and everywhere I went they’d tell me to go and submit online. World Market that’s you. That site re routed me to INDEED, a job service agency, though I’d never heard of them before. Now they post ads on TV, so I guess they’re legit. Of course, I never got a call. But, I’m now getting a ton of other job offers.
They really seldom do but boy do they send your info and they all lead in with the same line, over and over again.
These new job opportunity offers are using the first name of someone from my contact list. Fortunately, that’s easier to spot, because when I get one with the name of one of my kids, a red flag comes up for me automatically.
First of all, my kids NEVER email. If they want to reach me, they either call, Marco Polo or text. No emails.
If you need help, apparently there is. The following links will have to be copy and pasted.
Since I wrote the above article, it has unbelievably tapered off, hoped this doesn’t set off a new “wave”.
I believe I told you all my story. Fortunately, my lump was found early, but there are countless of women who don’t make it or… don’t try to make it, either because of age or how advanced it was when discovered.
What was interesting to me is the psychological journey that accompanied my diagnosis. With any disease, introspection became a part of my journey.
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Please help me out with this campaign and also share it with your friends.
If I were President, I would listen to the people and focus on what is important.
Immigration: A wall would not be necessary. It is time our borders were more secure. But, There is a process of coming to this country and it should be done legally. People should petition for their right to stay in this country should they already be here. They should show themselves to be conscientious citizens, obeying the laws of the land (we must keep in mind that although we sympathize with their situation, they are lawbreakers when they force their way through illegally). They must agree to maintain a measure of self sufficiency instead of draining our resources. Other countries have guidelines to insure that people who come into their country do not come in to drain their resources. They should be willing to learn the language.
If they are here only to work on farms, because I know how much farmers rely on them, then these farmers should build housing (possibly with government assistance since it would be a major undertaking to do so.) Perhaps the rents the workers pay for this housing, would go toward covering the costs of that expense. Right now many rent homes and two or more families share expenses. They can be sparse, but still reasonable, sanitary and clean and depending on location, heated and air. When they are paid for all monies will be held in a separate account for their maintenance and maintenance only. No dumps!
Welfare would be gradually eliminated and limited to those totally incapacitated and this must be strictly adhered to and used as it was originally intended. If a person is able bodied then he should work. Those on welfare should be put to work in some fashion. There is plenty for them to do.
Birth control is available everywhere at health departments and it doesn’t cost low income people a dime. If someone is receiving government assistance then they should have declining assistance for each child they give birth to. Having worked with these people, I know there is no incentive to exercise self control. This should be across the board, regardless of race and/or religion.
Instead of spending billions to smear one another’s reputation because they can, how much better would it have been for the current candidates to spend it on a worthy cause. THAT in itself would have spoken volumes to the American public. It boggles my mind that so much was not spent on what you can do for the people but in demoralizing them instead. How many families could have been helped with that kind of money?
I’m sure politicians will hate this, but let’s level the playing field. If they really want to help people then they should be willing to give up their enormous pensions. They are the only group I know of with guaranteed pension regardless of how long their term was.
PS. I wrote this several years ago, but my opinion has not changed.
I still want to see a more productive society by the decisions they make.
I know there are many opportunities available for those who truly want to become self sufficient. I also know there are political factions who encourage these programs because as long as people are addicted to free handouts, the more they can be controlled. Controlled to vote a certain way, have free time to protest and make noise or cause a ruckus that prevents them or anyone else the ability to move forward and progress.
A friend of mine just posted this on Facebook, sent to her by someone I don’t know, Tom Row.
It was too good not to share. Whether he originated it, I don’t know. It really doesn’t matter, because I’m absolutely certain I’m not the only one who has felt the same.
By Tom Row –
I don’t think anybody should be allowed to graduate from High School until they’ve read one of the most important literary classics of all time…The Little Red Hen. 🙂 In the story, the little red hen finds a grain of wheat and asks the other barnyard animals “Who will help me plant the wheat?” The response “Not I” said the cat, “Not I” said the dog, “Not I” said the pig. So the Little Red Hen said “Then I will plant the seed myself” and she did.
At each later stage (harvest, threshing, milling and baking the flour to make bread) the hen asks the 3 animals for help in the process again, and at each stage the animals reply with the same response “Not I” said the cat, “Not I” said the dog, “Not I” said the pig.
At the final stage, when the hen has finally baked the bread, she asks “Now, who will help me eat the bread?” If you’ve heard the story before you know the end. But, I’m almost positive that they aren’t teaching this story in school anymore. The response? “No, you did not help me plant, nor help me harvest, nor help me mill, nor help me bake the bread” so the Little Red Hen ate the bread and gave it to her chicks.
I grew up with this story. Such a simple lesson on being a responsible individual and helping others. Modern society no longer embraces this kind of thinking it seems. “It doesn’t matter that you did not contribute to any of the work or preparation in making something successful…you still get to eat from the fruit of people’s labor.” This kind of thinking is wrong. It promotes laziness and slothfulness and the ultimate feeling of entitlement that we see in our world today.
So you see, this is why this story should be resurrected and taught to our children at very early ages…like it once was…like it was in the days when people were more responsible and understood “cause and effect” relationships. Yes, let’s revive this “Literary Classic” before it is too late!
“The story of the Little Red Hen has been retold many times. First published in 1874, this folk tale teaches children the value of hard work and self-reliance. In the story, a hen finds a seed of wheat, which she decides to plant in order to make bread. Though she seeks the help of other farm animals, they refuse, and the hen must do all the work herself. When the bread is finally made, the other animals wish to partake—but, because they did not help the hen along the way, they are refused the fruits of her labor. The story has been featured as part of the popular “Little Golden Books” series and as a Walt Disney animated film, The Wise Little Hen (1938).”
2 Thessalonians 3:10 Even while we were with you, we gave you this command: “Those unwilling to work will not get to eat.”
Thank you Tom and thank you Stacie Reed for sharing this.
Hey guys! I’m on a roll, lol. Two posts in one day?
Where do I begin?
The other day, I was doing my usual morning walk, however it was destined to be a short one, yet before that happened something caught my eye…
What happened here? A few too many maybe?
More on that later.
Lately, because of the heat and my age, I’ve had to either start out at the crack of dawn or substitute the treadmill or elliptical in order to avoid the sun. It has been a scorcher both while I was in Salt Lake City and at home in Southern California. The heat and sun has been very intense. My outdoor plants in Cali had withered and died completely as I was not here to water them while I was in Salt Lake.
What a sad state of affairs. It has cooled down some since, but the loss is depressingly sad. I hate when living things pass out of neglect and circumstances.
On my walks I get to ponder many things and yes, I’m still walking to my K-pop tunes, but I’ve since added some Keith Urban and other pop artists to my lists as well. I’ve decided, I love Pink. She’s actually a good singer. I love how Keith Urban seems to be tuned into the female psyche. He hits home with me all the time.
One day I was walking, airpods in my ear belting out one of his songs, I think it was Blue Ain’t Your Color or Wildhearts, and this construction worker in a hole on the street, stops to tell me I have a good voice. I had to take that graciously since I’m singing loudly to a tune no one else can hear but me. My father always told me never to deny a complement but accept them graciously, so I did.
I’ve also added some Elmer Bernstein and The Greatest Showman tunes, which I also sing loudly to.
On my walks, I meet other people’s animals and photograph them. I spot unique garden designs or beautiful fauna. I see sad things and dirty things.
Once I went through a cycle of photographing a good many roadkills. It was quite the week, all these critters jumping into harms way like that. Some things I see, I’d rather not mention.
Lately, I’ve spotted injured coyotes that disturbed me. One such coyote was busily licking his wounds before he was aware of my presence and ran off. I kept looking for it wondering if it had died and I had visions of it being consumed by maggots. A couple of weeks later I saw another coyote, only this one was lying on the ground and appeared to be dead, but upon my approach, I called out. It startled me when it jumped up and leapt away. He also bore a scarred gash on his flank. At first, I thought it was the same dog, but photographs I’d taken before proved me wrong. I’d wondered if someone was doing them harm or were there just too many males and there is a hierarchy battle going on. No clue. After I published the photo of the second one on my Instagram, someone from the Eastern Coyote_Center, let me know there was a Coyote Rescue.org probably in my area and there is, so I now have a number to call should I see that again.
See the fresh gash?
CONTEMPLATION
These walks allow me time to contemplate many things. Life, my blogging friends lives, though I’ve not followed up near as much as I used to. It’s like where has my time gone? Why do I feel like I have no time? It is jam packed with so many things for some reason. I think of my family so far away and wonder if I’ve done a good job. Even if I haven’t, they love me and think I’m the best and cool. I’m grateful for all the love they give me. Thoughts. Some make me smile, some make me cry. I still miss my sister so very much. Our chats, her responses.
I discovered some of my best ideas for screenplays come out of my walks. At first, as these ideas came spilling out, I’d arrive at home 3-4 miles later, having forgotten what they were. Since then, I discovered my Notes App on my phone and started dictating my ideas to notes. At times you can see me having running dialogues with myself and my characters. That has been such a boon to my screenwriting.
Back to the beginning. As I said in the beginning, something caught my eye. I came across that big gash in the fence, off the road, in a business area. On the ground, was a hubcap and I immediately came to the conclusion that some drunk driver had careened into the fence some time during the night. It was a miracle he’d not gone into the ditch below. I shook my head and sighed then walked a few steps further and happened to notice a tree behind the fence, tipped forward and a large branch that had broken off in the direction of the dent on the fence.
Hmmm. Did I make a judgment error? I looked at it carefully and figured I had. It made me think. It was a tall eucalyptus tree and eucalyptus trees tend to have shallow roots, which seems odd since they grow so tall. Nonetheless, it reminded me of a time, some 40+ years ago when the same thing had occurred near my home at the time. I’d been away and upon my return, unbeknownst to me, we’d had an earthquake which jostled the tree across the street enough for it to become uprooted, falling onto my neighbors garage, seconds after their daughter had pulled out of it to go to work, no less! What a mess and a blessing Kathleen had escaped unharmed.
Like I mentioned before, it’s been very hot and I might add, there has been no rain, nothing to soften the soil and loosen the roots, so I wondered if we’d had an undetected earthquake as can happen often in California. Another Hmmm
My point though, and what occurred to me in all this analyzation is how busy my mind was to create and conclude a story. One that fit my logic. It made me wonder about the stories we tell ourselves and the judgments we make about the world around us either through our own observations or the influences of social media or through educated (or uneducated) guesses based on information we’ve logged into the recesses of our brains and how we use it to see the world around us. Why?
It made me sad, because in our relationships with our fellow man, we do it all the time. What is even sadder is how we tend to justify these analogies based on our own life experiences and the preset filters we create.
I realize that it’s probably instinctual, as instinct has been key to man’s survival all these centuries. Yes, they were necessary back then, but how well are we using them now? How and why are we letting outside influences, through both peer pressure and social media vomit and scorn, skew our thinking? It’s like we’ve become lemmings or as we had in Colorado, prairie dogs that periodically go off to a mass suicide death. To be honest, who isn’t influenced by the world around us? Who hasn’t quoted Yahoo, or preferential news sources or a Twitter comment as if it were the holy grail? Oh, and Quora, who follows Quora? We are so easily manipulated. I’m no exception. I sometimes believe how much so and so loves his wife or doesn’t, then there’s this or that person being a total jerk. Oh, then how wonderful so and so is, look at all the humane things he does. Social media can be and is often tweaked to be a weapon. Isn’t that what a certain person was counting on when she filed her suit against her famous hubby? Hmmmm
When I was visiting my children in SLC, my granddaughter showed me how to manipulate my pictures, add sound and do all kinds of stuff on my phone. Wow! If she does it easily, think of all the other things we are bombarded with that may be contrived to tell a story “they” want you to see?
But, apart from that, what about the things we see in those closest to us, those that social media isn’t posting about? This contemplative thinking made me aware of how unfair I can be sometimes with those I care about. A friend once told me, that trust is like a mirror, once it’s broken, it can’t be put back together. That hits close to home. We discovered that neither of us trusted the other, but mostly me, him. He once said there were things, I didn’t know or what he couldn’t reveal yet, and my response was bullshit! (sorry) In the meantime, I won’t tell him what I feel, because it makes me feel vulnerable. Have I become jaded? Has my own past colored my present?
I know I’ve shared with everyone, in earlier, previous posts, some of my childhood and past. Not wanting to live in the past, I’ve tried real hard to overcome these and change for the better, but my kids tell me it’s my past that has kept me from seeing things honestly. I trust when I shouldn’t and don’t when maybe I should.
I think because of the past, I tend to want to see results quickly, otherwise, I run away. Prove to me now and I’ll be fine. Perhaps, that’s also why I doubt and put up walls to protect myself. Does anyone else do that? So, in the interim, as my neighbor revs up his snazzy Corvette across the street, making a boatload of racket and drowning out my thoughts, I’d like to say… In conclusion,
if … anyone that reads this post has been hurt by my doubts, I’m sorry.
Some things we just can’t shake no matter how hard we try and at 76, I just learned that. Is it too late to try?
In the meantime, remember too, forgiveness is divine. 😉😉🥴
A Man in Winter by Katie Marie is a horror story on more than one level, weaving murder in with the tragedy of loss of oneself through dementia. My heart broke for Arthur as his mind took him away from the world, leaving him vulnerable and confused and desperate for justice for his beloved wife Molly. Treating the subject matter sensitively, this writer has created a tale whose horror lies in it’s very real possibility.
– Stephanie Ellis, author of Bottled and The Five Turns of the Wheel
Is there such a thing as tender hearted horror? Well, there is now. Katie Marie’s ghost story, A Man in Winter, connected with me on such an emotional level. In my opinion, the world of fiction needs more stories told from the POV of the elderly, and Katie Marie certainly delivers on that score.
Even though I am not a father, I was out enjoying the day.
Here’s my day in pictures starting with this father playing in the sand with his little girl. It was a lovely day.
Remember sand castles?A breakfast treatThis is my Where’s Waldo picture. Look closely and perhaps you’ll see everything I had hoped to capture in this shot. 😊An artist displays his work on the boardwalk.So many activities
It was wonderful seeing the many diversions dads and families were engaged in.
I had a video, but sadly I didn’t know how to include it. 🥺
I hope like heck, they will read this. What I like and don’t like.
This is the city I drive in when I’m in the city.
First of all, I want to say, up until recently I’ve loved driving. Unfortunately things have changed.
It’s not, for the most part, the people. Yes, on rare occasions I will get a flake and/or an intoxicated person, but overall, my people have been wonderful. Almost always, they are why I drive.
They listen to my stupid stories of the history of our city as I recall it, sharing with them out of the ordinary trivia, not found in history books or archival data, but from my own memories. I think, based on the questions they ask and their responses and feedback to the company, in general, they love it.
If I take them down to Little Italy, downtown San Diego, I share with them how before that district even existed, my dad, being friends with one of the early restaurant owners of Fillipi’s which is still there, would take us kids down there and the original owners would take us to sit in a back room on a long table and we’d have our own private sitting with huge plates of pasta. Something, I’m sure the current owners know nothing about. I was possibly 10 then, so that would make that about 65 years ago.
Then there is our Highway 5 freeway , which was just being built when I was a child. Then, the freeway was only a total of four lanes. Now, it’s more than 8 lanes! I remember the big dozers clearing a swathe of land for the new highway. I remember our ducks crossing the newly graded lanes to cross over to the other side with their ducklings filed behind them. Then there was the time one Halloween where we kids, not being freeway saavy, tried to cross the lanes and my mask kept slipping down and I couldn’t see clearly but seeing what appeared to be headlights coming straight at me. A very scary time, as we are lead by one of the local teens. Why my parents let him take charge I’ll never know. We could have been killed!!
I tell them about our San Diego based airline and how I was one of the cutesie flight attendants of that local commuter airline, wearing mini skirts and a tri-cornered hat. It was very sexist, before we knew what that was. Some of my passengers remember those days, or have heard tell about them, most don’t. I recall the big crash we had downtown. How those were people I knew well and lost.
What was and what no longer is. Areas now populated with new houses that are now old were once farmland or orchards and two lane roads. I tell them of places to visit and places to eat, nightspots and where not to venture at night, though it may be popular. I delight in their stories of where they are from, what they do. Even though politics and religion are two things not to introduce, it can come up, but it often more in relation to how things have changed. Never arguments or debates. If someone expresses a dogmatic point of view, perhaps contrary to my own, I’m okay with it. Sometimes, in this day and age, there really is nowhere to vent safely, so I give them that. It very rarely happens though.
They make me smile.
WHY I DRIVE
For the most part, I lead a very lonely life. Since my sister died, I live for the conversations with strangers.
They tell me their stories and I tell them mine. Mostly, in relation to the growth of our city. It is therapeutic. Sometimes too, I can be their therapist for the time they are with me, if just listening can be called “therapy”. It’s a win win.
THE DOWN SIDE
However, of late, since Covid 19, lockdown, masks, now no masks, it hasn’t been quite the same. Things have changed. The apps have changed. Many times my navigation doesn’t work right. I can’t get reception downtown or outlying areas like I used to or in apartment complexes, which has always been an issue. It makes my job challenging and frustrating.
Gas prices have escalated and both companies seem to think a $.50 surcharge is compensation enough, when our gas prices in California went over $6 a gallon in most places and no change in fare compensation it feels like rape. There have been no rate increases to the consumer and many of them have said they expected there would be. They are aware of the $.50 surcharge, which Lyft and Uber have said will drop by next month. Where does that leave us then?
I went to the HUB to complain, but no one has an answer.
The other day, I accepted an Uber ride that when it popped up said 6.6 miles. I thought it would be the pickup distance which I was fine with, however when I clicked it, they were sending me 35 miles for a 6 mile ride? Hell no! I only get paid for the 6 miles, so there was no way in hell I was taking that, so I cancelled. Or rides that take 1 1/2 hours for 30 miles or ones that take us like to Riverside or San Bernadino, far away from home and no paid rides back? For real?
Then Lyft is famous for sending us on a ride only to re-route us sometimes 2, 3 or 4 times zig-zagging all over the place wasting time, gas and energy. I’ve even had them send me 20 miles only to reassign me back to where I just came from for a short ride.
To be honest, I don’t know how they can keep drivers driving. When my day starts out like that, I’ll close the app and go home. I can’t suffer through that, because it’s like getting beat up each time and I want to be happy when I pick up my rider, not grumpy and sour.
One time, I accidentally started my app while I was doing my workout and suddenly got a call. Here I was all stinky from working out, but it was nearby and I felt bad for the passenger, so I hightailed it to my car and went to the pickup and drove them where they needed to be. That’s how I feel about my riders. They are important to me and I try to be very considerate of their time as I hope they appreciate my efforts.
Another thing that has changed since Covid, is the tempers of the drivers on the road. I have seen more road rage and aggressive inconsiderate driving since lockdown was lifted. It’s like a mean bug was injected into all these people from being cooped up and isolated. There are times I’ve had drivers barely miss me zig-zagging in and out of lanes at high speeds. It can be terrifying at times. When I am driving late at night and that begins, I shut down and go home. You can almost be sure those are drunk drivers on a testosterone high and I don’t want to be on the road with them.
One day, I was at an intersection at a stop light and a nice new BMW pulled up next to me. The light had just turned red, so we both stopped quickly. The car behind the BMW was not happy he had not run the light, I guess. He got out of his car screaming and shaking his fist at the driver next to me, who just happened to have his window rolled down. The man behind came up and literally yanked the guy out of the window (he should have had his seatbelt on or that might not have been so easy, I’m thinking) and pulled him to the ground and started beating on him right in the middle of the intersection. I was aghast. I saw a cop not far and beeped my horn several times to get his attention. Somehow or another my Lyft app picked up on my distress and asked if I was okay. Pretty neat feature I might say.
I’ve had people go around me when I didn’t take a right turn fast enough for them. Sometimes, the only thing protecting the person in the crosswalk in front of me is me. I never saw such behavior before.
I’ve been told by some of my riders that because of Covid, there are people who once relied on Uber and Lyft to commute, who now drive. Because of Covid, when Uber and Lyft drivers became scarce, they bought cars and began driving. No wonder they’re angry. Perhaps that is why they are so grumpy. I really don’t know, but if that’s the case, they need to take a chill pill and get back to using us.
However, before that happens, Uber and Lyft are going to have to take better care of their drivers. Uber offers incentives, but mostly if you drive in San Diego, which I don’t like. In many areas, navigational reception is horrible as are the street conditions. On one occasion, I drove over 30 miles with no directionals and the young lady I picked up, being from Latvia had no local phone access, so she couldn’t pull up navigation on her phone as some have done for me. Fortunately, Uber does include the address and I knew the area. Fortunately, she had the number of the young man who’d ordered the ride and was able to input his number in my phone to let him know we were nearing. Normally, that would be a NO-NO, since all calls made between rider and drivers are rerouted through a ghost number. This is a safeguard for both parties but I made an exception, since I wanted to be sure she arrived safely and to the right person, since downtowns anywhere can be generally spurious and one never knows. I’m sure neither of us held onto each others phone numbers. When there was positive recognition, I unlocked my doors. Had she indicated otherwise, I would not have left her. I’m not sure what I would have done, actually, but I would have wanted to know she was safe.
Then there are dicier neighborhoods to venture in to pick people up in. I carry mace, pepper spray and a Tazer, but I don’t want to ever have to use them. If I have any doubt, I keep it handy just under my leg. It’s never been a problem. My new car has auto lock, so I don’t worry someone will open the door while I’m at an intersection and I can roll the window down just enough to talk briefly to my passenger before unlocking it. Visibility at night in many areas is poor. One time another driver ran a stop and disabled my car a half a block from my rider. When the police came and my car was being towed, even the police didn’t want to stay with me until my ride came to pick me up. The tow truck driver took pity on me and drove me to my sisters. I live 45 miles away so that was too far. He said it wasn’t out of his way, but when I went to the tow site the next day, it really was. Out of his way, I mean. I was appreciative.
Needless to say, I don’t drive at night anymore and it is unfortunate, because nights are more profitable.
Things to consider. Sometimes, at night, despite the photos on the apps of the person requesting the ride, being able to see them well enough to know it’s them can be difficult. In those cases, before unlocking any doors, I verify who they are first. Not all include photos. Plus, unfortunately, not all those who request rides are the ones taking the ride. Sometimes they tell us, sometimes they don’t until the last minute. Both companies give us the option to decline a ride if it feels unsafe. My Spidey senses are generally pretty good. I’ve never had anyone get out of hand. I did have a group of drunk men once, who’s conversation was distasteful. What got me was that it was the older men, not the young man who had ordered the ride who were obnoxious. I let the young man know that in the future, it would be up to him to keep his companions in line or he could lose his privileges. He thanked me for the warning and for not arbitrarily penalizing him for his companions.
I’m of the mind that todays environment is too quick to cry foul, when they could just as easily just say, “that is unacceptable and I don’t appreciate …” this or that behavior, language or whatever. For Pete’s sake, just call them out on it.
THE GOOD AND THE BAD
Lyft is good about giving me mostly women, especially at night. Uber does not. Unfortunately, sometimes I expect a woman and at the last minute, I’ll get a text telling me I will be picking up a “boyfriend” or spouse. I love it when they give me a name. It should be required.
One such time, a guy covered in tattoos approached the car, I wasn’t too sure, so I rolled the window down a few inches. Within a couple of sentences, I knew he was going to be okay. Simultaneously she texted that he was the husband. It turns out he is a chef and restaurant owner. We talked about restaurants and ethnic food dishes we liked and places to go try. We had an hour together and he kept me entertained, talking the whole way and it was very pleasant.
I had a couple once that at first glance, were terribly unkempt and looked as though water had not hit their bodies in some time. They reeked of cigarettes. I mean a weeks worth, at least. I was not looking forward to being with them at all. However, they surprised me with pleasant, intelligent conversation. It was a mother and son and they were so kind and sweet. I told myself not to judge a book by it’s cover.
Another time, I went to pick up a couple in a nice area. I had to wait a bit for them to show. First to come out was the man, an Adonis cut figure of a man that should be on the cover of a magazine. He was looking away when he came around the corner and as he looked up brushed his hair back and as he looked up, I’m thinking, “Holy shit! That’s getting into my car?” I’m glad he couldn’t hear me suck in my breath, because I was stunned at how beautiful he was. Then, the woman comes out, looking like a Greek Goddess herself and I’m thinking Damn! How did that happen? I had no idea what this married, power couple would be like, but they were animated and as personable and likable as anyone could wish for. A double wow! He turned out to be one of the architects of the span bridges on the highways being constructed all over the place. She was a pediatric nurse.
One guy I picked up said he was the AP or associate producer for Maroon 5’s most recent video. To be honest, when I saw the video, I’m thinking uh no, he was Maroon 5, but I could be wrong, because that guy I saw sure looked like the same guy. Only he would know or admit to it. What did we talk about? You’ll never guess. Bathrooms. Yup! Bathrooms and music of course. We both knew where all the best bathrooms are and what businesses you could depend on for them. In his case, because he has little ones and with little ones you got to know the best places to stop when needed. With my driving, I have to plan for bathrooms and sometimes those can be hard to find. They have to be clean and safe. We also talked about Maroon 5’s longevity and formula and then strayed over to K-pop music, comparing groups and what we liked.
I’ve gotten young people who are dumbstruck that I know so much about K-pop.
Before Covid, I got a group of four young men, three in back and one in the front seat. There was an oldie song that came on the radio and the guy in front took it upon himself to crank it up and they (we) all rocked out and sang along the way to their destination, one song after another. That was a first and never happened again.
Can you picture it? An old lady and a bunch of kids in animated song. I’m sure we were a sight. Of course, I was limited to just singing.
I LEARN STUFF TOO
I learn so much from my passengers. I don’t just talk, though I must admit, I do the majority of it, but for the most part, it’s an even exchange of knowledge and that’s what I like the best.
Today, I learned that these fancy colors you see on high end vehicles are actually “skins” or Carmeleon wraps to protect their paint job. Some running into thousands of dollars. Some of you may not know what I’m talking about because it probably has more to do with where I live. I just happened to mention to one passenger how I’d seen a Range Rover in a purple pearlescent color that as I went by changed colors almost like a peacocks plume. I’d never seen anything like it. He told me they are referred to as skins and they are a thin film to protect the paint and value of the vehicle. They are mostly found in high end vehicles because they can be quite pricey. They can be washed and when they start to peel or whatever it is that happens to them, they peel it off and the paint underneath is like brand new.
"I have enough time to rest, but I don't have a minute to waste". Come and catch me with your wise words and we will have some fun with our words of wisdom.
joliesattic 