May We All Be Agitators

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I usually have 3 to 5 books going simultaneously, and one of the ones I am currently reading is a re-read of Mark Twain’s “A Connecticut Yankee in King Arthur’s Court”. This quote I read a couple of weeks ago has been sticking with me and gained in importance with the escalation of things in the United States and the world. It is a long one, but worth the read. May we all become more comfortable being agitators in our own ways. May we all live up to our higher ideals.

“My kind of loyalty was loyalty to one’s country, not to its institutions or its officeholders. The country is the real thing, the substantial thing, the eternal thing; it is the thing to watch over, and care for, and be loyal to; institutions are extraneous, they are its mere clothing, and clothing can wear out, become ragged, cease to be comfortable, cease to protect the body from winter, disease, and death. To be loyal to rags, to shout for rags, to worship rags, to die for rags—that is a loyalty of unreason, it is pure animal; it belongs to monarchy, was invented by monarchy; let monarchy keep it. I was from Connecticut, whose Constitution declares “that all political power is inherent in the people, and all free governments are founded on their authority and instituted for their benefit; and that they have at all times an undeniable and indefeasible right to alter their form of government in such a manner as they may think expedient.”

A Post For the New Year

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I have been doing a post every year that reflects on the previous year and gives myself a goal or two for the coming one. And I have to say this past year, 2025, has been a really challenging one. With everything going on with bigger societal issues, I have become really discouraged this year and gone into almost “freeze” mode, numbing myself as best I can, which hasn’t been the best for my creativity. It also took me so long to heal from pneumonia last year. I wasn’t able to fulfill my goal of getting sharp and strong entirely, though I did manage to come a long way. So that is one of my goals again for this year.

I did manage to grow my freelance creative work a bit, which is helpful given how much everything costs. And I am ready to let go some insecurities finally and stretch myself out again. Because really, with everything going on in the world, what is the point of personal insecurity these days, right? I have some thoughts about trying to eventually combine the work I do for money with the creative things I used to do here, not this year but maybe in 2027. So I will be attempting to write and art and make music and share those things here, as I am able to do so. I want to tap that creative well again and get unstuck.

Last year, I said I hoped 2025 would be a gentler year than I thought it was going to be, but it wasn’t. This year I hope for clarity and strength of character for us all as we try to figure out our next steps going forward. May 2026 let us overcome many of the structures that are holding us down, whether they be societal, familial, or self-inflicted.

Lady Liberty and Uncle Sam by Kat Micari

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I wrote this back in 2017, when things seemed bad. And they feel so much worse now.


Lady Liberty and Uncle Sam

Lady Liberty weeps
In the corner on the floor,
Torch extinguished.
Uncle Sam says
“Smile! Don’t you know
You are so much
Prettier
When you smile?
I can’t abide
Your ugliness.”
“Oh Sammy,” Liberty wails,
“Your games have gone
Too far,
And I feel such pain
That smiling is an
Impossibility.”
“You’re too temperamental,”
Uncle Sam replies.
“You let your
Emotions
Get the best of you.
Swallow it down, like me,
Until you are
Numb inside.”
Standing, Liberty shouts.
“No, I won’t allow myself
To become internally
Dead.
Nor will I hide
From the truth.
You have done terrible things,
And my name no longer means
What it did.
Payment is coming due, Sammy,
And I fear it has all been for nought.”
Uncle Sam snaps
And knocks Lady Liberty
To the ground.
“You’re a bitch and a whore.
How dare you question
My authority?
I know better than you
The way to control
These masses.
Fear and pain
Are tools of the trade.
Get used to it.”
He looks at her and laughs.
“You may be stupid,
But I’ll keep you around,
As long as you’re leashed.
I like that you
Do my feeling
For me.”
Lady Liberty rises once again
And lights her torch anew.
Calmly, gently, she sets
Uncle Sam ablaze.
“There are times,”
She muses to herself,
“That you just need to
Start over.”

Copyright 2017, Kat Micari

Getting Unstuck

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I have been so creatively stuck (and stuck in more ways) these past several months. It took longer to recover from my month-long fight with pneumonia at the end of last year, and this year living in the United States has been round after round of “what can possibly be happening now?!”. I have done the work I needed to do, and I have taken care of my family, and in between I have just felt so tired and trying to numb myself, trying to help in small ways and never feeling like it is enough.

I am dedicating myself this summer to use creativity to work past my blocks, to get back to helping other people lean in on their creativity too. It is through our creativity that we can dream bigger and better worlds for ourselves and then through action in our communities that we can work towards making those dreams into realities. I don’t know exactly what the future will hold for us, but anything that can keep our minds and bodies sharper and ready to go with the flow when necessary and fight when necessary has to be good.

I don’t have control over what is happening externally, but I do have control over myself (most of the time, ha!). Since life is fleeting, it makes no sense to let the power structure win inside of my mind and heart. I know that, so now I must put that knowledge to practice.

Change in the United States

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Book cover of The Little Book of Insurrection or the Poetry of My Discontent by Kat Micari, picture of flaming skull crying blood with flaming buildings on a decayed American flag background

I’ve been watching our national issues unfold this past month with trepidation, with feelings of impotence, and I have such a difficult time going about doing what needs to be doing, let alone finding space and care to create.

I published The Little Book of Insurrection or the Poetry of My Discontent back in 2014, over ten years ago now. One of the poems called The Fourth Reich feels so close to me right now as we have a Nero or Caligula in making. It is free to download and read.

I spent a long time asking people to think for themselves, to find a way to change the system or shake it up, to move us forward as a civilization. We could be living in harmony with nature and each other, enjoying freedom and the responsibilities that come with that freedom, helping all move forward together. But instead we change in the other direction, and the corporate oligarchy ruling in more than name, people literally having their lives ripped apart, many struggling for mere survival. It is going to get worse, and I don’t know if it will ever get better. So much squandered potential, worldwide, and I feel shell-shocked. But shocked into inaction does no one any good.

What are you doing to make yourself pick up the pieces off the floor and move forward during these times? How do you balance the daily work and struggles with the larger stage? I find myself only reading the news daily or every other day. I am trying to connect more locally. I am trying to get myself stronger even with the autoimmune issues and flare ups from stress. I am enjoying time with my family as much as I can. I am trying to support local, ethical businesses as much as I can and lift up the voices of the marginalized. But it never feels like enough, however I do it.

When Life Throws You Lemons…

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It has been a rough few months for me and my family. I mentioned in my New Year’s post that we had all had pneumonia. On top of that, we had a major car repair, and after sinking in a big chunk of money in December, that car is now dead a month later, so we have to deal with the stress of trying to get a car loan that we can afford. And my godfather just passed away. His passing has had me reflecting a lot on family and my youth.

And beyond my personal issues, we have the larger issues of what is happening in this country going around us. The Orwellian doublespeak, the cognitive dissonance, the lack of any real solutions to the problems we face, and the fear of what the future is going to look like. I feel like so many of us are struggling just to survive and maintain some semblance of sanity that it is difficult to do anything else. I want to believe that we can pull through as a nation and as a species in general, but I feel like we are passengers on a high-speed train heading for a collapsed bridge with no way off. We can pull off a last-minute save if enough of us try, but I don’t know if we will.

But for the sake of my children and my children, I try to make lemonade out of the lemons. I will try to create more. I will go back to my life goal of being a ripple that causes waves, even if I don’t ever get to see the waves I cause. And I will continue to choose love over fear, and to help however I can. I just wish it felt like enough.

New Year’s Eve Reflection

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It is time again for my annual reflection post and look to the future. Rather than do a list of resolutions, I pick one main goal or theme for the year. The first year was to cherish myself more, and I have gone through many different themes through the years.

This year was a big one, great in so many ways but really really difficult in others. I got to travel abroad for the first time (other than Canada which being in New York State scarcely counts since it is right next door). I did some designs that I am really proud of, got to connect with a lot of college students and help mentor them in, connected more deeply with my husband and children, and spent more time with family. But I still feel disconnected creatively. I feel like I have been able to tap in here and there, but honestly, I feel spread so thin trying to keep everything going and juggle all the responsibilities that when I do get a chance to myself, I am too exhausted to create.

But my 2024 goal was to reconnect to myself, and I did that. I have really thought about my wants and needs, I have been separating those that come from my ego and those that come from my heart and soul, and I have been taking baby steps toward wanting to create again. I dealt with some long term body and mind issues and was feeling stronger and more energetic, then I was sick for a long time with pneumonia the end of this year, which has left me weak and drained even more. And I am filled with so much uncertainty and heartache about the United States and the world. So my goal for 2025 is to get sharp and strong again, so that I don’t feel so close to the breaking point every time I get a setback in my life. Getting stronger and sharper will let me have more energy to create more.

And of course, I want to continue to grow my income, build more local community, and give my family opportunities to thrive, which all ties into the strength. I want to help more people, and to do that, I need more resources. I want to not feel helpless.

I used to feel like a Cassandra speaking of the future to those who wouldn’t listen, but I honestly don’t know what is coming next. And that may be for the best. I hope 2025 is gentler than I think it will be, and I wish you all the best in the coming year.