Hello my neglected space.
My last draft has been sitting since the plane ride back from Taiwan.
And now, I start work tomorrow. Any words of advice for me?
thoughts which escapes the mind
on my BB, on my back, just before bed
Sunday, July 15, 2012
Monday, May 28, 2012
And so a month has passed since my last post. Only a single sleep, or half of it, remains before my results of my final semester would be released. At this witching hour, I sometimes wished I had a friend on the other side of the globe that I could talk to. But I guess its time for my own thoughts. Probably a pretty fitting way to wrap up university since results day is tomorrow. Over the past month, many things came and left. And I'll just go through them in the order my brain churns them out.
Exams were probably one of my least worries. Considering that FYP was really the bane of my life amongst other things. But nevertheless, it would be foolish to write off exams. I've had three exams this sem. One was language for Chinese Level 1 which was before reading week itself. I honestly should shoot myself in the foot if I don't score an A for that module. Do I deserve it? Probably, but definitely got room for improvement considering how I always tend to slack off in the end and copy answers instead of actually listening to the audio tape.
HR module caught me by surprise tho. It was something I dread and wished I didnt need to take. But teachers really make all the difference. I feel that despite her failure to keep to time schedule and leave enough time for other matters, she actually made HR bearable and a whole different experience from engineering modules. So it is true what they say about modules in other faculties. I actually found it interesting the way the floor opens up to comments after each presentation. Its a real eye-opener hearing comments from your peers. Some you can tell that their comments are so generic that it adds no value, yet there are those which hit the exact chord and it impresses me how some people actually look at things or vocally expresses that they are pissed. And all this is possible cause of our tutor! tho she won't read this, I am really grateful. Oh, and as sadistic as it sounds, I had fun writing the exam. Its really been a while since I wrote essays but my thoughts just flowed. I even managed to end off the essay with a quote that I heard from watching criminal minds. Funny how entertainment also adds value to your education.
For the TE module, well, probably the hardest to score an A amongst my examinable modules. Much of the weightage has already be decided from other assessments and projects. Honestly, I did my best for the individual projects, probably did decent for my group projects. There's room for improvement that I am aware about, but heck, I've explained it in my last post anyway. I guess in a way I'm hoping to get lucky with the finals. Found the paper pretty alright. Typical DC paper. Ran out of time and I just had no idea what to scribble to answer one short question towards the end of the exam. Didnt help that I was sitting next to profs blue eyed boy and he happily stretched his hands in indication or rather announcement that he has finished his paper like 10 minutes before time. =.= Oh well, hope I did as well as my previous project management module back in year 2.
FYP... where oh where do I even begin. I guess I should start with screwing up my final presentation. I dont think I've screwed something up this badly before. It sucks that most of what I propsed is correct, but I made an illogical jump which leads to a different aim of the research altogether. Why oh why didnt I realise this or why oh why didn't my prof pay more attention to my work. But then again, after talking to so many people, I realise that most profs don't pay much attention to their students works anyway. You're doomed if your prof doesnt care, and doomed in a way that you are busy as hell if he does care. Either way, FYP is a pain, just with varying degrees of pain. Despite how horrigible I felt after the final presentation, I'm glad that I managed to present much better for the poster presentation. At least I wasnt feeling like an idiot standing there among my peers.
Sometimes the things you do on the spur of the moment are the ones you remember best. Had a last minute outing for dinner and ice cream after the final poster presentation. Dinner was at Marche and dessert was subsequently at Vivo's rooftop overlooking the monorail heading to Sentosa. Haha. Its been a while since I actually kicked back, relax, stare at the stars and just talk. That night there were no stars tho, but windy enough to not be uncomfortably stuffy. I realise I don't do much of sitting aorund and just talking. Its different from hanging out and playing cards. It leaves little time for talk and I'm probably too distracted playing the card games than thinking of an intelligent reply. I wished I did more of this throughout my uni life. But then its the things you do differently that you would remember, not the routine. More opportunities in future I hope? Which reminds me of yet another topic.. Work.
Screw work, back to why the outing in the first place. Grad night, themed greco-roman. Rather interesting theme. Breaks away from the usual formal wear where you're only as spectacular as the amount you invest in your suit. Switching to a more fun theme allows imagination to run wild, and I have my sister to thank for that. 80 percent of my costume is a product of Kuching carpenter street! Managed to drop by the Bersih rally in Kuching too. Oh ya, its downright appalling to see all the conspiracies and response on the bersih rally for the first few days after the rally all the way until freaking now. Its a different scenario to be 'protesting' from 2-4 but if you're still around looking for trouble at 5-ish to 6, then well, you're pretty much inviting trouble. I don't believe there was a need to breach dataran neither was there a need for police brutality. I guess I shouldn't say too much about this 'hot' topic, but I do regret and feel sorry for the lost of lives that day.
Anwyays, back to grad night, it really was a night to remember, and I'm glad that in civil engin, we have the right kind of people at the helm organize and bond people together. I really feel lucky to be a part of the relatively small cve community. I'm gonna miss the fact that I can basically start random conversations which people from the cohort and get to know them a little better. There's no ulterior motives and there's time to hang out. For lunches, dinners or just to hang out. Loved how the dinner was organized. There was a pretty big team of organizers actually. Much thanks to them. I pretty much decided to sit out of organizing this one. A time for me to sit back and enjoy the show. But I must say, I do feel for my firend who's always at the head of the organization. Hopefully one day its your turn to join purely as a participant. I thank my friends who voted and cheered for me. I hope the play acting of being king with sombong attitude doesnt stick. The slideshow of pictures over the years made me hold back a tear, despite not contributing to it. I'm emotional that way. Its really touching to think how the years have gone by, the friends we made. As we go on, we remember, all the times we had together. =)
Embarked on Grad trip Part I from Melaka to Penang! My first ever time to Melaka, Ipoh, Taiping and Penang. Started of in Melaka with the awesomest people for one night, before switching to join my band of brothers for the remainder of the journey. Its a food trip which I pretty much documented on my fb, so if you are interested in the places I went too, go check out the pictures there. Despite the enjoyable company, I must say that the incessant need to look over my shoulder when I'm typing on my phone is downright irritating. Why the need to keep an eye on me and the constant need as if seek my approval? There is nothing wrong with learning something new. There is no need to act as if you know everything already. Its annoying. You call a brother a poser for wanted to take nice pictures. Display pic worthy pictures. Then when its cool, you jump on the bandwagon. Thinking about irritating people sometimes let you think about yourselfs. Makes me wonder if I too, am seeking another persons approval. Its kinda funny how I know why you do waht you do so well. I kinda feel that you're the person who probably understands me better than most people. Keep your friends close, keep your enemies even closer?
Sometimes when you are unsure of a decision. You look out for a sign. Or you ask God for a sign. One day, I was wondering if it was a good idea. I was in Church. Kneeled down on the church pews as I began to ponder my decision. Usually my thoughs would be "i should be alright". But that day, it hit me hard. 'No' was the answer. A smack in a face NO with no room for negotiations. I don't know how or why, but it just happened. If this is not a sign, I wouldn't know what is, unless God one day subscibes to SMS service, but I'm not too sure there's network coverage up there. Only one for prayers, thats for sure. Two days later, NO was not the answer I gave. Why do I do this to myself? The feeling of being almost there, can reach there, not yet there is killing me. And not just about my CAP..
Despite what my results will show tomorrow morning, or rather in a couple of hours, I will remind myself that it is the journey which matters, the destination is an added bonus.
what do you know.. a friend on this side of the earth replies! or maybe from a different world?
Exams were probably one of my least worries. Considering that FYP was really the bane of my life amongst other things. But nevertheless, it would be foolish to write off exams. I've had three exams this sem. One was language for Chinese Level 1 which was before reading week itself. I honestly should shoot myself in the foot if I don't score an A for that module. Do I deserve it? Probably, but definitely got room for improvement considering how I always tend to slack off in the end and copy answers instead of actually listening to the audio tape.
HR module caught me by surprise tho. It was something I dread and wished I didnt need to take. But teachers really make all the difference. I feel that despite her failure to keep to time schedule and leave enough time for other matters, she actually made HR bearable and a whole different experience from engineering modules. So it is true what they say about modules in other faculties. I actually found it interesting the way the floor opens up to comments after each presentation. Its a real eye-opener hearing comments from your peers. Some you can tell that their comments are so generic that it adds no value, yet there are those which hit the exact chord and it impresses me how some people actually look at things or vocally expresses that they are pissed. And all this is possible cause of our tutor! tho she won't read this, I am really grateful. Oh, and as sadistic as it sounds, I had fun writing the exam. Its really been a while since I wrote essays but my thoughts just flowed. I even managed to end off the essay with a quote that I heard from watching criminal minds. Funny how entertainment also adds value to your education.
For the TE module, well, probably the hardest to score an A amongst my examinable modules. Much of the weightage has already be decided from other assessments and projects. Honestly, I did my best for the individual projects, probably did decent for my group projects. There's room for improvement that I am aware about, but heck, I've explained it in my last post anyway. I guess in a way I'm hoping to get lucky with the finals. Found the paper pretty alright. Typical DC paper. Ran out of time and I just had no idea what to scribble to answer one short question towards the end of the exam. Didnt help that I was sitting next to profs blue eyed boy and he happily stretched his hands in indication or rather announcement that he has finished his paper like 10 minutes before time. =.= Oh well, hope I did as well as my previous project management module back in year 2.
FYP... where oh where do I even begin. I guess I should start with screwing up my final presentation. I dont think I've screwed something up this badly before. It sucks that most of what I propsed is correct, but I made an illogical jump which leads to a different aim of the research altogether. Why oh why didnt I realise this or why oh why didn't my prof pay more attention to my work. But then again, after talking to so many people, I realise that most profs don't pay much attention to their students works anyway. You're doomed if your prof doesnt care, and doomed in a way that you are busy as hell if he does care. Either way, FYP is a pain, just with varying degrees of pain. Despite how horrigible I felt after the final presentation, I'm glad that I managed to present much better for the poster presentation. At least I wasnt feeling like an idiot standing there among my peers.
Sometimes the things you do on the spur of the moment are the ones you remember best. Had a last minute outing for dinner and ice cream after the final poster presentation. Dinner was at Marche and dessert was subsequently at Vivo's rooftop overlooking the monorail heading to Sentosa. Haha. Its been a while since I actually kicked back, relax, stare at the stars and just talk. That night there were no stars tho, but windy enough to not be uncomfortably stuffy. I realise I don't do much of sitting aorund and just talking. Its different from hanging out and playing cards. It leaves little time for talk and I'm probably too distracted playing the card games than thinking of an intelligent reply. I wished I did more of this throughout my uni life. But then its the things you do differently that you would remember, not the routine. More opportunities in future I hope? Which reminds me of yet another topic.. Work.
Screw work, back to why the outing in the first place. Grad night, themed greco-roman. Rather interesting theme. Breaks away from the usual formal wear where you're only as spectacular as the amount you invest in your suit. Switching to a more fun theme allows imagination to run wild, and I have my sister to thank for that. 80 percent of my costume is a product of Kuching carpenter street! Managed to drop by the Bersih rally in Kuching too. Oh ya, its downright appalling to see all the conspiracies and response on the bersih rally for the first few days after the rally all the way until freaking now. Its a different scenario to be 'protesting' from 2-4 but if you're still around looking for trouble at 5-ish to 6, then well, you're pretty much inviting trouble. I don't believe there was a need to breach dataran neither was there a need for police brutality. I guess I shouldn't say too much about this 'hot' topic, but I do regret and feel sorry for the lost of lives that day.
Anwyays, back to grad night, it really was a night to remember, and I'm glad that in civil engin, we have the right kind of people at the helm organize and bond people together. I really feel lucky to be a part of the relatively small cve community. I'm gonna miss the fact that I can basically start random conversations which people from the cohort and get to know them a little better. There's no ulterior motives and there's time to hang out. For lunches, dinners or just to hang out. Loved how the dinner was organized. There was a pretty big team of organizers actually. Much thanks to them. I pretty much decided to sit out of organizing this one. A time for me to sit back and enjoy the show. But I must say, I do feel for my firend who's always at the head of the organization. Hopefully one day its your turn to join purely as a participant. I thank my friends who voted and cheered for me. I hope the play acting of being king with sombong attitude doesnt stick. The slideshow of pictures over the years made me hold back a tear, despite not contributing to it. I'm emotional that way. Its really touching to think how the years have gone by, the friends we made. As we go on, we remember, all the times we had together. =)
Embarked on Grad trip Part I from Melaka to Penang! My first ever time to Melaka, Ipoh, Taiping and Penang. Started of in Melaka with the awesomest people for one night, before switching to join my band of brothers for the remainder of the journey. Its a food trip which I pretty much documented on my fb, so if you are interested in the places I went too, go check out the pictures there. Despite the enjoyable company, I must say that the incessant need to look over my shoulder when I'm typing on my phone is downright irritating. Why the need to keep an eye on me and the constant need as if seek my approval? There is nothing wrong with learning something new. There is no need to act as if you know everything already. Its annoying. You call a brother a poser for wanted to take nice pictures. Display pic worthy pictures. Then when its cool, you jump on the bandwagon. Thinking about irritating people sometimes let you think about yourselfs. Makes me wonder if I too, am seeking another persons approval. Its kinda funny how I know why you do waht you do so well. I kinda feel that you're the person who probably understands me better than most people. Keep your friends close, keep your enemies even closer?
Sometimes when you are unsure of a decision. You look out for a sign. Or you ask God for a sign. One day, I was wondering if it was a good idea. I was in Church. Kneeled down on the church pews as I began to ponder my decision. Usually my thoughs would be "i should be alright". But that day, it hit me hard. 'No' was the answer. A smack in a face NO with no room for negotiations. I don't know how or why, but it just happened. If this is not a sign, I wouldn't know what is, unless God one day subscibes to SMS service, but I'm not too sure there's network coverage up there. Only one for prayers, thats for sure. Two days later, NO was not the answer I gave. Why do I do this to myself? The feeling of being almost there, can reach there, not yet there is killing me. And not just about my CAP..
Despite what my results will show tomorrow morning, or rather in a couple of hours, I will remind myself that it is the journey which matters, the destination is an added bonus.
what do you know.. a friend on this side of the earth replies! or maybe from a different world?
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