Cats

The downstairs people have a cat.  A pitch-black devilcat.

(I’m sitting at the desk computer, so this will be longer than the posts I post with my iPad/iPod.)

When they got the cat, I asked them not to let him frolic in the garden, because of the birds, insects, ROSES, tomatoes, herbs, etc., that he attacks, plays in, poops on.  More importantly, he kept intimidating my doggie, and I wasn’t having that. I suggested that if they insisted on his going outside, they could let him out through the front rather than into my garden.

They ignored me.

A big section of the yard is now torn up where the cat decided to go for the outdoor-litter-box look.  I realise it was just a mossy covering, but now I’ve got to replant the whole area. (In a way this is ok, since I’m going to plant wild Swiss mountain prairie grass/flowers.  But I’ve got to figure out a way to keep him from attacking the area once I’ve seeded it.) 

He climbs my albizia and breaks branches.

He has killed a bird and left it under the albizia.

He has POOPED IN A FLOWER BOX FULL OF HERBS!

He has peed on my lawn mower.

He leaves immense poops all over the place. 

He climbs on the roof of the garden shed and has dislodged one of the big clay tiles.

He has come into my house, and he enjoys sitting on the kitchen window watching me.

I bought a(n expensive!) device which emits sounds which theoretically scare off cats.  Doesn’t work.  I’ve put down pellets.  Don’t work.  When I see him out there ready to do something I don’t want him to do, I run out with the intention of spritzing him with the hose.  He rushes to the wall above their patio and sits there staring insolently.  He knows I can’t shoot water into the patio.  

This is an extremely intelligent cat.  (Much more intelligent than his owners.)  He fascinates me.  However, I may kill him.

(Not really.)

Coming soon!

Coming soon!

iPhone 6 – Back to the present

Why is there so much white space in this?  Sheesh.

What I wanted to say was… Twitter is like having pretend friends.  Or, being on Twitter is like pretending to have friends.  I mean, I say things to people I don’t know at all but whose tweets I read, thinking they will answer because we hang out.  (Mostly British actors I’ve seen on tv and with whom, therefore, I have a special bond.) Which of course we don’t.  I look at some of the things I write and I’m surprised someone hasn’t already come and put me in a home for ageing stalkers.

Pathetic.