Be polite and courteous, but speak your mind in the right, gentle tone. Challenge and critique but not about the important things and certainly not the emotional ones. Don’t push too hard too soon or too fast, don’t ask for anything, wait for him to ask you instead.
Let him make the moves.
Be aloof and airy, relaxed and racy — but don’t be reserved and don’t be overly confident. Be ballsy in a way that’s not threatening, don’t make him feel inferior to a woman. Show how you feel through touch and temptation but don’t give it up before three dates. And once you do (because you should, or he’ll think you’re a prude), don’t talk about it, don’t act like anything changed at all — even if for you, it all did. Know how to go down and go up, up and down, be great at what you do, in and out of…
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Sometimes I lose sight of what I need, and begin to chase what I want. What I think I want. I feel as if I’m in a circle, repeating my actions. I wish I could just stop running and actually learn to let someone in without guarding myself so deeply. I spend so much time quiet and reserved, trying to hold myself together when at the end of the day I just wish I could tell people how I really feel. I wish I could pinpoint the exact moment I became so guarded and scared of connections with people… but I can’t. Even I cannot decode this puzzle of a wall I have surrounded myself with.
There it goes again. That heavy feeling in your chest when you don’t feel any desire to speak or move. All you want to do is close your eyes and sleep, because the process of being broken is incredibly exhausting. You attempt your best to make your days fulfilling, but no matter how hard you try you can’t seem to connect to anyone or anything.
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