If you noticed, The Shallow End went dark for the past couple of weeks. Turned out the lights, put a little “Gone Fishin’ ” sign in the window, locked the door, and left. Left for Italy for two whole weeks. Yes, I said Italy. I still can’t believe it myself. Let’s back up. The VP … Continue reading
10 Awesome Things About a Broken Refrigerator
Last week, our not-very-old refrigerator decided it had had enough, and decided to quit on us without any notice whatsoever. Just packed up its little Mary Poppins bag and stomped out the door in a huff. I know, so rude, right? For a few days I whined and complained, but in light of the terrible weather now … Continue reading
Halloween Costumes, My Nemesis: So We Meet Again
How’s everyone doing with getting their kids’ costumes together this year? We ordered ours. Mostly. Trust me, there’s a good reason for that. Every year, Lucy decides on a Halloween costume that is quirky, strange, and “out there”, just to make sure no one else she knows is doing it. So, yes, these are not … Continue reading
Humiliation: It’s a Good Thing
VP and I often talk about how small choices in our lives might have made a difference, to the point where if a certain thing happened, or didn’t happen, maybe we would never have met. Neither one of us got terrific grades, for example. What if one of us had studied harder? Or at all? … Continue reading
But Does He Do Windows?
Much to my chagrin, every time I clean the house it somehow gets dirty again. I don’t have time for this, people. I am a Very Important Writer, and besides, my mom is many people are waiting for me to post. So I have decided I need a housekeeper. Good help is hard to find, … Continue reading
Sandwich Pants
Can someone please help me? My husband, aka VP, has disappeared. Well, not exactly disappeared, but the version that I met almost 16 years ago seems to have gone by the wayside. Something sinister has him in its tentacles, and I fear I am not strong enough to save him. It all started with something we … Continue reading
Some Random Things About Me
Readers, My head is buzzing right now. I think it’s that I attended my high school reunion, and it was an overwhelming experience in a lot of ways. (That or the three cups of coffee I had this morning. Maybe both.) I am trying to process the experience of my first reunion in twenty years, … Continue reading
A Handy Guide to Attending Your Class Reunion
Readers, It’s reunion season again, and since I’m practically an expert, having attended one once, I thought I would take this opportunity to answer your very important reunion-related questions. You’re welcome. Question: Should I diet before my reunion? Answer: Absolutely. Take a tip from today’s “in-the-know” brides: Find a willing doctor, have him install a … Continue reading
Chapter 2: In Which Some Bad Things Happen, Plus Some Good Things
Afternoon Readers! When we last left off, my clever plan to feed my kids concession-stand fare in lieu of cooking dinner had been foiled due to a thunderstorm. I now present to you the rest of our ill-fated evening, this time in handy Good/Bad format. Bad: Arrive at restaurant to find that the rest of … Continue reading
Chapter 1: In Which Nothing Goes Right
The night had all the makings of a disaster. The VP was away on a trip, so when Friday night came around, I was tired from a week of “single parenting”. My frazzled state, plus the fact that my daughter had a game at the high school stadium and had to be there by 6:30, … Continue reading