Returning to Blogging
Facebook’s fumbles have made me realize that I really miss good old fashioned blogging.
New Directions
It’s clear that I’ve been neglecting this blog. I’ll confess that Facebook and Tumblr have been my main ‘sticky traps’, attenuating my long thoughts, and getting me stuck on a scrolling treadmill of increasingly trivial and fractional things. Maybe it’s true that using the Internet screws with your brain.
Of late, though, I find myself craving less screen and rabbit-hole time, and more book, music curating, and thinky-time. Several factors have been part of this: Gordon White’s Rune Soup, and my fellow Mages. And Star Trek Beyond and its buildup. Beyond will be ‘behind’ in a couple of weeks, but the metaphysical side is only growing.
My magickal peers will probably agree that things have really been busting out of the stupid box of late. And my personal hunch is that things will get worse before they get better. This Rune Soup podcast with astrologer Austin Coppock goes into some deep detail about how unprecedented the events of this year have been- and it isn’t over. Let’s just say that August is going to be very interesting. Stay on your toes…
Gordon’s book “The Chaos Protocols” gets into some interesting stuff involving modern day Chaos Magick. Suffice it to say that this sub-genre of metaphysics has been maturing and becoming more refined. It’s no longer the ‘see what sticks’ mentality of the 80s and 90s. I highly recommend it- even if you’re not a Chaote.
One thing it has done has been to reboot my own interest in magick, and finally climb back into the saddle. I ditched the whole lot about a decade ago- walking away from bullies, charlatans and the public side of things. I still have no desire to become a public figure, and have shelved the idea of a podcast, YouTube channel, livestream, or any other overt interface with the public beyond a blog. I’ve also decided to turn off commenting on this blog, mostly because of spam and malware propogation. WordPress does a pretty good job of keeping it at bay, but I’m sick of the spam. But I’ve also accepted that I am truly an introvert and prefer to maintain my privacy. I am in no way a guru or advisor, or high poobah, nor do I wish to be. I prefer to maintain a low profile, and occasionally share things I’ve learned. I’m the Teacher Who Appears… and disappears.
I do want to get back to real writing, not just little posts on a very deeply locked-down Facebook. Hopefully, that’ll mean more goodies here for you to read and enjoy.
Stay safe and sane, folks.
Portable Slab of Distraction
Almost seven years ago, I wrote an essay about my distaste of Apple’s hype machine. It was written shortly before the launch of the now-iconic iPhone, where people were lining up outside the then-rare Apple Stores, waiting for this new, and very expensive new phone. iPods had already swamped the digital music universe, pretty much wiping out any competition. Tablets were still rare, and the few that existed were clunky, required styluses, and people were hoping that maybe netbooks might be something people might want. Windows had launched Vista, which was a massive flop, and people were disillusioned.
2007 was an interesting time, so when Apple launched the iPhone, people glommed onto it like it was gold. Three years later, Apple scored again, with the launch of the iPad, sending people swooning and swarming to get it. Like the iPhone before it, iPads started showing up in the hands of affluent people, parked alongside their newer iPhones, and it seemed, to me, at least, that the digital world was reshaping itself to cater to Apple’s whims. (more…)
Old-school vs. new-finagled
I spent the last hour fiddle-farting around with my network, trying to get the TV to talk to the computer.
It warms the cockles of my little techie heart to be able to write a sentence like that. And if you’d told me 30 years ago that TVs would not only talk to computers, but essentially be computers themselves, I would have stamped my foot impatiently and grumbled about having to wait for it. But this 21st Century digital paradise has more than a few bad Apples. And Samsungs, and Dells, too. OK, maybe not really bad, but definitely not grade-A techie-licious.
The problem with all this new-finagled stuff is- as Scotty once memorably said, ‘the more you overtake the plumbing, the easier it is to stop up the drain’. And that’s true. There’s been an advantage to waiting a while before pouncing on some of this stuff- like the refinements of the UX/UI, but there are still a whole raft of bugs in the system. It works… sort of.
The Introverted World
I am an introvert, which makes me something of a minority in this extraverted world I live in. The internet is my main tool of interaction with this noisy, ego-driven place- permitting me to browse along the periphery of the crowds, dipping into thoughts and ideas that I would not normally peruse. In the Actual World, the cognitive noise of extraverts tends to cause me almost physical pain, and I stay well away from things that attract tons of people. In fact, the word ‘attraction’ serves as a warning for me to either avoid such places, or to carefully prepare myself to bail when things get to be too overwhelming to me.
I just read this article about folks like myself, and much of it resonated with me. One thing I sometimes get asked is if I am shy. No, I am not. I do not care about social judgment, or what other people think of me. I’d be unable to function if that were the case. Instead, I prefer to live my life as authentically as possible, permitting people to like (or dislike) me on my own merits. Happily, I’m a relatively humorous, intelligent, articulate person, and get along with all but the most pathologically insecure people. I also do not suffer fools or foolishness gladly, and will not permit such people to give me grief.
The Christmas Time Warp
It’s not yet Thanksgiving, but already the shops are jingling and moaning with the usual musical treacle that the holidays bring. It’s hard to go into a public retail space without hearing the same tired old chestnuts roasting over their various fires while trying to find new socks. When this happens in September, as it did in one shop I furiously stalked out of, it’s criminal. Dashing through the snow before the trees have even turned should be a criminal offense, with the miscreant companies forced to be wrapped in fake spiderwebs until December 1st.
But I digress. I’ll admit that I dislike 95% of holiday music. Whether it is religious or secular in nature really doesn’t matter- most of it is syrupy drivel stuck in a time-warp that creates a place that never existed- except maybe in a movie or two.
A Veteran’s Journey
Today is Veterans Day. The radio, TV and Internet are chock full of stories about combat veterans, memories of those who were killed in combat, or while serving. It almost seems like this day, which originally marked the end of World War 1, gets confused and muddled with Memorial Day, which is meant to remember those service people who have died. I do not mean to trivialize those losses, but to instead clarify that today should be devoted to those veterans who are alive. Veterans like me. I am a veteran of the Cold War and Desert Storm. I enlisted in the US Air Force right out of high school, a few years after Vietnam ended, and was given about a year’s pay and shown the door right after Desert Storm. I honorably served 13 years- eight of them overseas.
As time passes, my generation is finding itself increasingly overshadowed on two sides- on one, by the Vietnam generation, and on the other, by the men and women who served- and are still serving- in the longest conflict our nation has ever engaged in. The Cold War generation of veterans is probably the largest group of veterans outside the Enduring Freedom cohort, but, like the generation that served between World Wars 1 and 2, we’re largely overlooked.
Following “The Chair”
For the past few weeks, I’ve been watching a Starz original series called “The Chair”. Its premise was to follow and film two rookie directors as they created a movie using the same script, budget, and location. It was produced by Chris Moore, who did “Project Greenlight”.
The ‘hook’ for the series was to have the audience vote on the two movies, and award the winning director $250K, which isn’t chump change. Its less prominent, but equally important hook was to promote Pittsburgh as a filmmaking destination. The series is set in Pittsburgh, as are both movies- giving the city a cinematic cameo- especially in the amazing credit sequences- and providing the backdrop- in mid-winter- for both movies.
The fledgling directors selected for this adventure were Anna Martemucci, of the Periods film family, and YouTube star Shane Dawson. Anna went to screenwriting school in New York, Shane worked off-the-cuff creating comedy video shorts in LA. Two radically different people- Shane with a huge, enthusiastic teen audience, and Anna, with a dynamic, supporting family.
Nine episodes (of ten) in, it’s clear that Anna made the better movie, but the odds are that Shane’s monster number of fans will utterly swamp her votes. Both directors made rookie mistakes- Anna had difficulty on the front end accepting the reins of leadership- she was used to working in a very collaborative way with her husband Victor Quinaz and brother in law Phil (who also had a supporting role in the movie). Shane, on the other hand, had his difficulty letting go of the reins of control- he chose to star in it as well as direct it (not easy for even seasoned directors!). And he refused to let anyone else edit his film, refused to take critical notes from his colleagues, or sit in on the audience evaluations. He was used to working on his own.
The end results were as one would expect- a warm, laid-back, cinematic movie from Anna (Hollidaysburg), and a frenetic vulgarity-laced extended-length YouTube video (Not Cool) from Shane. Each movie was unique, but watching both, one can see the bones of the original script behind the two very different visions. Both directors even got final cut- a rarity for first-timers. So, we saw their movies.
That’s what we’re supposed to see when we watch this show- the stories of these two people and their various collisions with the realities of movie making, culminating in the end result- two new movies. Good, fine television in and of itself, and a field day for behind-the-scenes movie fans.
But “The Chair” has some additional surprises for us. In a surprisingly original and meta- move, we’re also seeing the documentary being made of the show itself. A third story, about the creators themselves. Cleverly placed floating credits tell us who is whom, and what role they’re playing. It’s nearly like knocking the fourth wall down to pony-wall height, and letting us watch the watchers. No artifically introduced drama was involved, which is quite a change from usual ‘reality’ fare. There were clearly decisions made in the editing as to what discussions of the documentary crew, the budget, the reactions and interactions of the various producers, and the struggles of the various companies involved be revealed. We even get a memorable scene of the normally laid-back co-producer Zachary Quinto expressing anger and disappointment about one of the films. This takes “The Chair” from mere fly-on-the-wall voyeurism to nearly live television. It’s an edgy and daring step to take, and the people involved in producing it- Chris Moore and “Before The Door”, Zachary Quinto’s production company- did the thing. They hung it out there on the edge, and pushed the envelope. Did they bite off more than they could chew? Could they pull this off? Would they get funding? I found myself on the edge of my own chair wondering what was going to happen next.
I’ll be brutally honest- most TV is boring and predictable as hell for me. I know the tropes, the clichés, the probable plot-twists, the generic characters- as well as any long-time viewer does. So, surprising and engaging me isn’t an easy thing. But here was a story within a story, hiding in plain sight; the story of a newish production company (Before The Door has been around for less than a decade) going through its own School of Hard Knocks, and emerging on the other side with a few scratches and dings- but infinitely wiser and experienced. Having to shepherd two fledgling directors through this process, and dealing with the various surprises and pitfalls along the way- while at the same time tending several other irons that were in their fire -had to be a real stress test for them. But as far as I can tell, they soldiered through, and succeeded in telling a third, just as compelling story.
Because of other commitments, Zachary Quinto and Neal Dodson could not be as available for input during the shooting as they wanted to be. Zach was making “Agent 42” and Neal was helping director J. C. Chandor put the finishing touches to the forthcoming movie “A Most Violent Year”. So their appearances were more like cameos- showing up briefly on Shane’s set once, and later at the screenings of the rough cuts.
So it fell to the third main member of “Before The Door”, Corey Moosa, to fill in for Zach and Neal, and demonstrate that he was able (and mostly willing) to go the extra mile for Shane’s movie. Shane’s script called for both exposed male genitals and a bare butt, and Corey, trouper that he was, managed to find the former for his director, and provide the latter himself. Corey also had a lot of screen time talking to the documentary crew about the processes himself. He turned out to be the most visible and memorable member of the Before The Door team, bringing them into the story in a warm and often humorous way. Zach has called him the ‘heart’ of his company (with Neal the ‘mind’ and Zach himself as the ‘face’), and Moosa demonstrated that amply in the course of the film.
He was especially prominent in attempting to both support and direct Shane’s efforts to permit more outside input and craftsmanship on his movie- including taking corrective notes from Shane’s staff, professional editing, and sitting in on the pre-screenings, but along with Shane’s producing partner Lauren, Corey was repeatedly rebuffed. Shane was determined to pull that load himself, without regard to his own actual competency in those roles. Sadly, that showed up in the finished product, angering Zach so deeply that he removed his and Neal’s name from the credits. Corey’s remained, in a producer role.
On Anna’s side, all three were listed in the credits of her movie. And additionally, her own company, Periods.Films, also showed up in the credits. Her own shortfalls were more along the lines of inexperience and perhaps a little too much insularity- the biggest problem audiences had with her film were the very subtly differentiated female characters (audiences complained that they looked alike) and some uncertainty as to who was narrating the story, and why. Was this Tori’s story? Scotts? Heather’s? I think she did a good job in getting that sorted in the editing and dialogue stages. And sometimes, in the heat of production, a rookie director gets so much input that it requires a fresh set of eyes in the editing bay to see what the audience is going to see in the character design (unlike Shane, she handed that task over to professional editors). We only see what the camera sees, not what the director sees in casting, rehearsal, and between shots. She got to know her actors quite well. We only got to know them on the business end of a TV screen. Unlike Shane, I expect that Anna will learn from her newbie errors, and go on to create many good movies.
But “The Chair” is ultimately about storytelling. And in that, they succeeded. I rarely let ‘appointment television’ cut in to my Saturday outings, but that has been an exception these last few weeks. I’ve had a ton of fun watching the show, and interacting online with the various producers, and Anna and her family. This was an unexpected bonus- another manifestation of the digital porosity of the fourth wall. I watched both films, and voted on them. And next week, we’ll find out who ultimately won. I am hoping that Anna will, but the odds are against that, considering Shane’s sheer numbers of fans. I hope he’ll learn from his experience, and if he wins, uses his winnings to polish his chops. And even if Anna doesn’t win, she’s well on her way to an interesting, and hopefully rewarding career. Female directors are still way too few and far between, and every lady we launch adds additional richness and depth to a popular culture that skews way too far towards young male tastes. I like comic book and superhero movies as much as the next person, but there should be room for other voices as well.
http://www.starzplay.com/Originals#1
Hallow-what?
I miss Halloween. That might sound strange, since we’re right on the verge of it, but for me, Halloween is a relic of the past, of a life I no longer live.
Seeking Purpose
I like this image- it is an excellent illustration of interactive elements of motivation, and how to live a good life without being dragged down by inertia. That, along with ennui, depression, and boredom are the enemies of purpose, although if you properly utilize their energies in the Current and Pattern, they can be useful.
I’ve always distinguished between profession and vocation: my profession (what I’m paid to do) is messing around with computers and communication technology of all sorts, and my vocation (spiritual calling) consists of my flying under the radar as a quietly practicing 21st Century Mage- the cumulation of all my occult and metaphysical training. I am a TechMage, if you want to get precise.
But what are the elements of my passion and mission? I have a passion for writing and learning, and I love collecting and curating music. I am now in a place where I prefer gaining experiences to accumulating physical things. And as I grow older, those passions are deepening.
My mission? I think I’ve expressed this in becoming the Teacher Who Appears (and Disappears). It’s difficult to pin down- am I a lightbearer? A healer? An awakener? A 21st Century shaman? Some of all of these? I do know that I wasn’t sent here to consume and breed. I am a bundle of incarnated sunlight- an avatar. I came to this place with pre-loaded cues for me to access at a certain age and stage of my life- if I survived to that point. I did- barely. (Avatars aren’t given any physical privilege when they incarnate- they’re subject to the same life hazards as all beings.) But my cues guided me in a different direction from most people. My express disinterest in being DNA- driven was evident from some of my earliest lucid (post age 7) memories. That disinterest and in consumption and breeding only grew as I matured, and continues to be a major driving force in how I live my life today.
These four elements- my profession, vocation, passion and mission answer the four questions:
‘That which I love’ combines my passion and mission: learning, and teaching the Pattern and Current through Light and Sound, and Appearing and Disappearing when necessary.
‘That which the world needs’ combines my mission and vocation: Using my understanding of Current and Pattern as a Mage to bring the awakening Light to others, so they can also apprehend their real purpose, and break free of the traps of consuming and breeding.
‘That which you can be paid for’ combines profession and vocation. Happily, I do get paid for being a techie, and I have a very portable and in-depth skillset. And I am gradually sanding away my distaste for asking for recompense for magic(k)al favors- readings, insights, and the like. I prefer barter in that realm, though. And I do have an idea for a book in my mind, which might bring me a few bucks if I am prudent about how it is published.
‘That which you are good at’: I am a computer whisperer. I can mind-meld with any tech, and fix nearly anything that isn’t broken beyond my means to repair it. And I am an excellent writer and curator- I have accumulated a wonderful treasure chest of experiences, and have good ears, good taste in food, books, and environment (albeit a bit quirky at times- but who cares?), and younger people seem to like me. When someone says they want to be me when they grow up, that’s a high compliment.
Now we are at the Venn center: Purpose. What is my purpose? I am a TechMage with deep experience in both the physical and spiritual realms. I have a tuneable noise filter, and can see through the often-deliberately crafted noise-smog to the kernel of a matter. I can reveal it, understand it, and make it real to those around me. I use my craft and skills to poke people Awake and discern Current and Pattern through light and sound. My professional skills keep me alive, and my vocational skills save lives.
What is your purpose?
Light-Headed Thoughts 
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