..small steps..

..to care for yourself 🍀

Pernah merasa sakit, patah hati, sedih, marah, dan kecewa,…… ketika dijauhi & ditinggalkan begitu saja.
Pernah merasa dunia begitu gelap, sendiri, dan sia-sia,…… hingga di keramaian tiba-tiba air mata tumpah tanpa sebab.
Gak ngerti, merasa sudah berusaha sebisanya tapi kenapa berakhir salah semua..

I blame myself for everything,
and it was one of the worst things that could happen to a person: losing your self-worth.

Years have passed since, and I still struggle every day. Still need to constantly remind myself that I am worthy. That I am good enough. I pick up every little compliment people throws at me and hold on to it to survive another week.

I was broken. It took me years, but now I know better 🍀

Kakek semalam,

“Na, duduk sini sama Kakek..”

“Na, sehat2 ya.. doakan Kakek juga sehat, biar bisa lihat Ana ada yang jagain”, 

“Na,……… peluk-cium”…… 

Dan jam 3 pagi ini saya nangis lagi..

Have been pushing my introvert self too much,

I am hating my brittle self-esteem,

In my attempt to appear happy, cheerful, and positive all the time,.. I exhausted myself,

I keep blaming myself for everything that went wrong — today and the past couple of years,

I have to keep reminding myself that…… I am doing OK,

Noone can take away my competence, pride, & dignity. 🍀

..wajah ramah penuh senyum yang masih terselip dalam memory,

sepenuh akal & logika saya tahu kamu sudah berbeda,

berlalu dengan hidup & pilihanmu.

Saya tahu saya tak lagi ada dalam memory manismu.. Saya tahu…….

Tapi saya rindu. 🍀

..udah dong,

jangan nangis lagi. 🍀

Sudah.

Lupakan.

Jangan biarkan memory meruntuhkan hati.

Lupakan.

🍀