Parenting is hectic but such a rewarding mission. Being a parent one is constantly living as a live image example, continuously looked upon and emulated hence helping out in shaping up the little children to grow being ‘adults persons’ of the future.
Constantly, is the term to use, because being a parent is continuously being a portrait where ‘do what I do’ is what really matters rather than talk-talk as well as instruct-command approach with no action approach will never bear any fruits. So as a parent one ought to be a morally right person to influence a positive morally right habit that can constantly be repeated to create and solidify principles and style that will be a kid’s way in future; but a reverse of that also still creates a reverse of certain principles, what I call a ritual.
Let me stop there for now, so that you don’t get confused of what this article is all about. My conversation here is about the constantly frequented habits that we take on that have become daily life styles. For starters, what comes clearly to me is, what I remember of my roommate whenever upset with someone, he would never entertain you to say anything as he lashes you out and if by chance you ask the where about of something he would constantly say ‘I don’t know…I don’t know’ while trying to avoid eye contact and this till we end up both laughing it out as you struggle to find the stuff you looking for.
What are rituals? I think it’s just good to define the term. According to WordWeb dictionary it is “Any customary observance or practice (that one does constantly…I added)” whereas a habit is A habit (or wont) is a routine of behavior that is repeated regularly and tends to occur subconsciously (Wikipedia).
Let me just talk of some common daily rituals that I have noticed from people around me:
- Morning binge
Personally I hate eating in the morning, and I don’t know why. I am told it because I eat like a king for my supper, which is not true. I think I just hate the food whiff early in the morning and so the preparations of any dish, food stuff in the mornings, kind my ritual. I would say, give me fruits in the morning, yes there am ok, not food.
Moreover there is this habit, a ritual I should say for these persons who love to eat in the morning. They would never leave the house without eating, the ‘morning bingers’. Get me right here, I know that one ought to eat like a king in the morning, but to some people they live as kings, as their supper time is still a feast too, bigger kings also during lunch time literary ‘partying’, that’s my problem and it ends up being a ritual to me. Because if I know I will get a good lunch, I don’t really mind breakfast, a drink is enough.
- Meeting someone on same route to work: ‘friends not friends’
Oh yes, this friends who are not our friends, just an illusion or if you like our inborn human traits maybe. I am talking of these persons that we think we are friends with but in real sense as just strangers that are not our friends and we have hoot knowledge of who they are apart from having a commonality of using the same public transport or same lane everyday as we enter our offices or while going home.
Strange how one start with simple ‘hi’ sometimes, thereafter in confusion the hi-effect gets its magic and one tends to think you know each other. Risky, may be, not, but it should just end there with a smile and acknowledgement of presence thereafter no more. It might be a potential stalker.
The ‘friend’ bubble gets popped up when you meet them in a different vicinity and different timing, that where reality hits where one is hit with an ignored face are a complete snob of ‘do I know you’ look which shakes one to the truth, that we don’t know each other apart from seeing each other on the public roads.
- Looking and never finding
Everyone knows someone in the family or office that ‘looks’ but never finds whatever they are looking for. I am talking about that person who asks the whereabouts of almost anything in the vicinity. Where is comb?”, “Have you seen my shoes?” “Sorry have you seen the highlighters?” You explain to them where to locate the stuff and seconds later they back saying “where exactly?” as they could not locate or did not search properly.
All they want is you to come and direct to them specifically where the stuff is. Such an annoyingly habit, a total irresponsible habit whose fruit is always a very weird scapegoating tactic and blame shifting act, a denial of ones weakness of being disorganized.
- Wetters and drylings
Strange that I will mention this, because am as some years back I was as guilty as charge till I learned to be a dryling.
Okay, let’s break the terms here, a wetter is a person who comes out of the bathroom wet and dripping without drying themself first and they will start searching the towel while outside the bathroom. Whereas a dryling will finish almost all the cleaning and drying process while in the bathroom, and this is regardless of the size of the bathroom and they will come out as dry, fresh and ready for the dress up.
This is a common habit of a majority of us men, we are mostly wetters. Funny as you would think its as irresponsibility miss but I would differ because I think it just happens spontaneously and out of impulse one chooses either the two.
Let me mention also, these habits happen not only in the bathroom, but it’s a situation of how a person handles water in general. For instance, on raining season, the two persons are common also, the ones who do enter the house with wet and dripping coat only to remove and hang the wet coat while inside the house unlike the other persons who would remove the coat, shake it off the excess water thereafter hanging it inside or mostly on the verandah letting it dry first before hanging it inside. This is also same with umbrellas and hats too.
- Salting before tasting the food
I find this hazardous and an unhealthy ritual which is mostly for the case with men eating a braai. When one cuts the juicy and succulent well done piece without even tasting it, they just add salt before eating the piece. Why would one do that? Taste first and then evaluate. Furthermore it’s better to spice up with pepper than to splash raw salt then eating it, this is a vice, and addictive but dangerous onwards.
- Loo speeders and lazers
What, loo speeders and lazers, I can’t believe I am writing about this.
True to the articles heading, it’s just about some common spontaneous routines of doing stuffs, rituals I called them.
Loo lazers will go to the loo prepared to seat, relaxed and in peace for hours despite the aroma’. This is just a generalization because we also have our feminine species who are also the lazers in the loo and you will notice this by the hours it takes before the flush makes its signature ring.
Nonetheless, it’s the bathroom that is a sanctuary for the ladies unlike the loo where high speed is rate of removal, auch.
- Loo urge
Ever called on someone or a group of people, like, “let’s go now?” and immediately this is said one person will run to the loo to take a piss and instantaneously they will be followed by almost the entire group in the direction to the loo. Reflex or habit, am not sure but it’s such a common impulsive habit among many. I would call it let-me-take-piss habit, always has company.
- Same Voc choice
Mostly when you are in an enthusiastic talk among peers, as one is jumping with a story and another is interjecting with more stories or adding something, some speaker might use a jargon or a vocabulary while expressing themselves. Thereafter out of the blue the jargon or vocabulary might be newly acquired term in town where it will be used by almost all speakers as if it were a new invention.
I still remember in this trolling show on TV, where a speaker used the word balkanization, oh, it became the jargon of the day; everything and every topic discussed used and had the word all through.
May be I have missed on some habits, if so, comment and let increase the commonly habits and routines we do spontaneous that becomes our lifestyles.
To pen off let me quote wonderful words of wisdom:
“Your beliefs become your thoughts,
Your thoughts become your words,
Your words become your actions,
Your actions become your habits,
Your habits become your values (rituals),
Your values become your destiny (lifestyles).”
– Mahatma Gandhi.
If the voice is true, then am in that situation, and the voice is clear, the voice that tells me to believe, the strange voice that is unrealistic but seems true.
U-waz-Hea 