I have been inspired to write this blog by my friend who writes the most inspirational, motivational, and hilarious blog I’ve read; whenever I see an entry it makes me laugh – she suggested that I do the same in my own way and to be my authentic self ….
…. which leads me nicely onto my blog name; lazypuffhead, which just rolled off the tongue during our conversation and being a lazy puffhead I couldn’t get my head around thinking of a more suitable name, so I think it must be ideal.
It is being brought to my attention on a daily basis by my long suffering husband (I’ll call him Honey) that I need to get a job.
Fyi, I have been a self employed transcriber since we’ve been married; 20 years now. It was a job that I could do from home (audio typing basically) and make decent money. Over the years my business has dwindled to the point that I’m bringing in very little money (even when I was making okay money I was running up substantial debts) and am now relying heavily on Honey.
I have smoked since I was a teen and have only managed to quit once properly (when I was pregnant with my daughter – I’ll call her Lurky) and to a major extent when I was pregnant the second time (Son is now 11 years old). It is a majorly expensive habit and it has cost my family a lot, not only financially but in many, many other ways too on a daily basis, year after year.
For the last little while I have been having trouble breathing – I’ve put it down to anxiety but let’s face it, how anxious can I really be!!? – I power walk, 6 miles a day, mainly because it helps with my breathing (I really feel it bad if I don’t walk for a few days).
With this in mind I suppose it really is time quit – but I feel totally powerless – every time I have an inkling to stop, I smoke even more, to the point where I really don’t try and it just nags away at me.
Funnily enough, about a month ago I was looking for some support on quitting and I went through the motions of taking advice and making notes and even setting a quit date (which happens to be 2 days from now). During the last month I had a plan which was going to make me ready to quit on the 17th April. However, I did not instigate the plan even though I know it was a good one.
I won’t be setting a new date until I instigate the plan:-
Aim
- To stop smoking weed and nicotine so that I can breath again.
- To use my money in more productive and sharing ways.
Plan
- Use nicotine patches during the day; don’t smoke anything.
- Take the patch off in the evening and smoke a couple of joints.
- Do 1. and 2. for one week.
- In week 2, do the same thing but only smoke one joint a night.
- In week 3, do the same thing but only smoke at the weekend.
- Week 4; GIVE UP!!
Scary, huh!?
And on that note I think I will go back to my garden and think about giving up some more.
lazypuffhead 
Say what?