Paperback 1137: Tormented Bride / Myron Kosloff (First Niter 218)

Paperback 1137: First Niter FN 218 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Tormented Bride

Author: Myron Kosloff

Cover artist: [Gene Bilbrew]

Condition: 9/10

Value: $100

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover: 

• OK, we got us a good one here.
• I adore the middle-aged middle school teacher whose spectacles are about to pop off her face. She's so excited about this tight-skirted, belted-coated spectacle of a woman that she's grabbing Betty's arm to make sure she sees. Betty has definitely seen.
• Are the ladies at the bar? Behind the bar? The stools are on this side, but they're on the other side. And the bartender appears to be on the same side they are. At least I think dough-faced hyena man is the bartender. He's got epaulets, which says "uniform," which says "maybe he works here." Anyway, the layout of this bar is all kinds of off.
• Actually, the closer you look, the more things are bizarrely, creepily off. What is our strutting lady doing with her left foot. It's landing at a right angle to her direction, which basically ensures that ankle breakage awaits her in the near future. And those heels. Jeeeeezus. No human could walk in those. She's fully on tip toe and the heel is still on the floor.
• Then there's the inexplicable side of the booth (?!), which creates a huge arced swath of white on this cover—a shit-ton of negative space that adds nothing to the composition and bears no resemblance to anything you'd find in reality. Speaking of "you'd never find it in reality," that blue-faced dude in the bottom-left. That's a lot of face for a seemingly marginal dude. Definitely creeps up the joint even further.
• I think the strutting lady and the bartender have just come from the first and possibly last ever meeting of the "World's Smallest Necktie" club. He's laughing because his necktie was narrower by 3mm. Better luck next time, Tormented Bride!

Best things about this back cover: 

• Oh great, as if things weren't disturbing enough, we're just leading with RAPE
• Thank you, Lord, for granting unto us the phrase "whirlpool of perversia." Your magnanimity is truly overwhelming.
• "Excuse me, can you tell me which way to perversia? ... Just turn left at the light? Great. And do you know if they have a whirlpool there? ... Yes? Excellent." 
• Tracy Gilbert, leather-clad dominatrix. Leather! Lesbians! BDSM! Minuscule neckwear! Is there any kink this book doesn't have?? 
• Why would you try to "escape" the "bonds of lesbianism" with "boyish Olive Thurston"? Who gave you that advice?
• And it all ends in "pie" because of course it does.
• "Twilight World!" My favorite queer codeword is back with a leather-clad vengeance!

Page 123~

    "I—do you want me to do something?"

    He caught his breath. "Like what?"

    She hesitated. Then: "You know. Relieve you."

!?

~RP

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Paperback 1135: The Twilight Lust / Val Arden (Royal Line 105)

Paperback 1135: Royal Line 105 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Twilight Lust

Author: Val Arden

Cover artist: [photo cover]

Condition: 7/10

Value: $25

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover: 

• "Adults Only may see my nipples. Yes, I'm serious, those are the rules. I'm crossing my arms defiantly, so you know that I am serious."
• I want one of you to dress as This Lady for Halloween, insane wig, chainmail underwear, "Adults Only" sign and all. Dying decorative houseplant optional.
• "Twilight" is code for gay/lesbian/queer. Always. Such a great code word. My favorite cover copy word, right up there with "frank" (as euphemism for "dirty")
• There should be more condition ratings for old paperbacks than just Good, Very Good, Fine, etc. There needs to be a word that gets to the specific quality of a book like this, which is unread, square, perfect, but also aged to hell and scuffed and notched by a saw at the top, maybe sun damaged. It's like "Excellent/Poor"

Best things about this back cover: 

• Wow. Wow. . . yeah, wow.
• Who can forget the first stirrings of "girhood?" Not me, that's for sure.
• "Satisfaction in treir seeking." "Treir seeking" was a lesbian spiritual/sexual practice. No one remembers what it was anymore. This book is the only record of its existence. Did they ever find the treir they were seeking? You'll have to get your own copy to find out. 
• It's like someone found a "rejected cover copy" text-file dump and just filed it as final copy. Like, on a dare. "Surely an editor will clean this up." And yet here we are. 
• Somehow the most disturbing thing to me about this back cover is how horribly off-center the copy is. That, and the grime. Oh, and the sad, misaligned final word. Poor "body."

Page 123~

She saw the irritation darkening his face and knew his pride had risen to overrun them. He could not let himself be concerned. He had never come to her with questions. Only with orders. And, certainly, he wasn't about to start now. Especially not now. Finish.

That first sentence starts out great ("She saw the irritation darkening his face") and then just falls off a cliff and never stops falling. This paragraph is like "Notes Toward a Paragraph." I can't stop laughing at "Finish." It's like an annotation or an editor's note that was never supposed to make it to print. Like, "Remember to come back and finish this paragraph because dear lord it is a mess."

~RP

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Paperback 1126: Chicago: City of Sin / John J. McPhaul (Book Co. of America 005)

Paperback 1126: Book Co. of America 005 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Chicago: City of Sin

Author: John J. McPhaul

Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 8/10 

Value: $9

[Chapter 2 Books, Winona, MN (July 2025)]

Best things about this cover: 

• The title is great. And the book is in very good condition. And the imprint is rare (this is only my fourth "Book Co. of America" book). Other than that, not a lot to recommend this cover. Maybe the title font. That's pretty nice.
• Grim photo. But it's also small enough that I don't really notice it much. My eye just kind of takes it in as an abstract arrangement of darks and lights. The title, with its garish yellow-on-black color scheme, is far more eye-catching than the photo.
• It's weird that this scene (and its description) dominate the cover of the book, because (as you'll see), the book isn't primarily about the St. Valentine's Day Massacre, or even organized crime generally. It's an overview of all the "sinful" aspects of Chicago.

Best things about this back cover: 

• "[...] THE ONE CALLED MADISON?" Why is there a "?" at the end of that sentence? Do they not know the name of the street? Are they unsure? Maybe the typesetter left the "?" in there to remind himself to go back and factcheck, but never did.
• I don't know what "THE RIDE" is. Hang on ... lol when I google [birthplace of the ride] all I get is Sally Ride (she was born in Los Angeles, btw). Huh, not sure what "the ride" is supposed to mean. It's got sexual connotations, but I doubt Chicago is the birthplace of sex. It also can refer to being taken to prison, but again, prisons predate Chicago. Is it like being taken for a ride, as in scammed, somehow? Maybe it's some kind of hot dog ... 
• Pretty dishonest to say that the book is "SEEN AND TOLD BY AN ALL STAR CAST OF WRITERS AND REPORTERS," which implies that the book will be a kind of anthology of famous people's writing, and it is not. It's all John J. McPhaul, the "author" of the "famous film" Northside 777 (not a bad flick, tbh). Charles MacArthur wrote plays in collaboration with Ben Hecht; he was married to Helen Hayes, the first woman to win an EGOT. Finley Peter Dunne was a Chicago-based nationally syndicated humor columnist of the late 19th/early 20th century. "Written as though speaking with the thick verbiage and accent of an Irish immigrant from County Roscommon, Dunne's fictional 'Mr. Dooley' expounded upon political and social issues of the day from behind the bar of his South Side Chicago Irish pub." (wikipedia).

Page 123~

Patterson was running the New York News when a corset salesman named Judd Gray became enamored of Ruth Snyder ("a chilly-looking blonde with frosty eyes," in Damon Runyon's words). She was encumbered with a husband. The pair disposed of him with murder so badly botched that they were quickly arrested and sentenced to death.

Not sure why the head of a New York paper is in this book about Chicago, but knowing that Damon Runyon covered this fiasco makes me want to read more about it. Also, "encumbered with a husband" is a nice phrase. I've known more than a few women who could be thus described. 

~RP

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Paperback 1087: Pal Joey / John O'Hara (Bantam F2892)

 Paperback 1087: Bantam F2892 (3rd ptg, 1965)

Title: Pal Joey

Author: John O'Hara

Cover artist: [Uncredited]

Condition: 7/10

Value: $5

[Autumn Leaves bookstore, Ithaca, NY, May 2020]

Best things about this cover: 

• Yes, this cover is very very ... let's say beige? ... but what a great sense of geometry. It's a picture of recognizable things, but it also steers toward abstraction, pure shape and color. That red rectangle colliding with that amazing right triangle formed by the bottom of the page, the stair railing, and the man's back and cane. It's got the heat of desire mixed with the austerity of geometry. And a large houseplant of some kind! All the visual food groups!
• Her dress is hot. Giant polka dots or white flowers or whatever that pattern is—very pretty, very summery
• But back to the houseplant. Is it supposed to look like that? It looks, well, frankly, dead. Amazingly bold choice to put that single stem directly in front of her face. Like, they are hiding the least amount that they could be hiding. The appearance of discretion with none of the actuality. 

Best things about this back cover: 

• Can't say the image improves with repetition.
• There were three kinds of women to Joey. Joey had just two things on his mind. Joey was no good with numbers bigger than, say, five.
• Very impolite to just leave the hat and cane there. Tripping hazard. But Joey does not have a brain capable of considering the wellbeing of others. It's just dames and success up there. He's already forgotten he even owns a hat and cane.

Page 23~ (there is no p. 123! book's only 120pp. long!)

Well the train pulled out and that is the story of how I am now in Chi. I am singing for coffee and cakes at a crib on Cottage Grove Ave. here. It isnt much of a spot but they say it is lucky as four or five singers and musicians who worked here went from here to big things and I am hoping.

[sic] on that "isnt" there. The book is epistolary, a series of letters to a guy back home named Ted, and the letters are full of all Joey's idiosyncratic spellings. "Briefley," "et cetra," that sort of thing. "I am singing for coffee and cakes at a crib on Cottage Grove Ave." is a wonderfully musical line. Now I want coffee and cakes, so if you'll excuse me... 

~RP

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Paperback 1066: Anton York, Immortal / Eando Binder (Belmont B50-627)

Paperback 1066: Belmont B50-627 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Anton York, Immortal

Author: Eando Binder (pseud. of Otto Binder)

Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition :7/10

Value: $5-10

Best things about this cover:

• When your space nurse comes to give you your space shot ...
• Look out, space Indiana Jones! The space boulder! Behind you!
• Anton York, Lord of the Sparkle Wands!
• I love how everyone who designed anything in the '60s was high as fuck
• If "Eando Binder" seems an improbable name, get this: even more improbably, it was the pseudonym of two entirely different Binders: Earl Binder (born Hungary, 1904) and Otto Binder (born Michigan, 1911). Today, Otto's our guy.

Best things about this back cover:

• This is the future version of that Uncle Sam poster: "I Want You ... to be Immortal"
• OK, this is just the round part of the front cover art, boo, seen it, boo!
• What the hell is a "man of tomorrow"? When are "the dim future ages"? Why must this "man-made God" die? I guess I could read the book, but somehow the continuing adventures of Anton York, Space Dork are not tempting me

Page 123~

He was the living zombie of the hypno-beast.

If that's not the opening line of a '60s psychedelic rock song (or a '60s novelty song), I don't know what is

~RP

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Paperback 1063: Tama of the Light Country / Ray Cummings (Ace F-363)

Paperback 1063: Ace F-363 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Tama of the Light Country

Author: Ray Cummings

Cover artist: Podwil

Condition: 7/10

Value: ~$5

Best things about this cover:

• She's back! Well, actually, this book is earlier than the last one (Paperback 1062), so ... she's here! For the first time! And yet again! Tamagain! Tamalamadingdong! Slicing her way through the planetary system, god knows why...
• Tama, Queen of Forgotten Serial Characters!
• Those blood-soaked wings are phenomenal, why didn't she catch on / take off!? Fewer Marvel movies, more Tama movies!
• Once again I identify with the nondescript dude in the background urging Tama on while staying safely back
• Caught between two space volleyballs, Tama braces for she knows not what!
• I see no evidence that she has been or is about to be "Kidnapped by a spaceship," let alone "Kidnapped by a spaceship Exclamation Point!"

Best things about this back cover:

• Not much
• LOL satellite paranoia! Nice.
• "Furore"—when it's spelled like that you are required to pronounce it with three syllables like "Volare!"

Page 123~

I do not find it pleasant, nor does Rowena, nor do any of the rest of us.

It's settled, then—I won't bother with this book. Thank you, Mr. Narrator.

~RP

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Paperback 1061: The Relentless Rider / John and David Shelley (Ace F-340)

Paperback 1061: Ace F-340 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Relentless Rider

Author: John and David Shelley

Cover artist: Uncredited

Condition: 8/10

Value: ~$10

Best things about this cover:

• Seems like it should be "the name / the game" or "his name / his game"; the mix-and-match reads awful
• Not sure why you'd name your gun "patient" but I like a cowboy with the guts to be different
• This cover is not that interesting, though I love how RELENTLESS goes hard, end to end, no margins, and I love that pop of yellow up top
• Got this as part of a completely unexpected library sale haul—didn't even know the library was having a sale. I was just there to check out some J.G. Ballard, as one does
• The book is bright, square, and unread. It's mildly warpy—not sure what the term is for that

Best things about this back cover:

• OK, just a block of text, yellow-orange on red-brown, hang on, just let me put my glasses on here and ... Booger? Really?
• The "eat. Booger" juxtaposition midway down the page is really making it hard to see anything else
• "Carving teeth for a rangeland dentist" well there it is I have discovered the most whimsical western occupation ever

Page 123~

"Wrong on number one," Booger said, "so you might as well quit guessin'." He went on to tell Kinney what had happened, and Kinney sat shaking his head, his brows describing ups and downs and curlicues as the story unfolded.

Kinney's legendarily acrobatic brows got him steady work in carnival freak shows, though he kept this part of his life to himself, fearing, rightly, that his cowboy friends would not understand

~RP

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Paperback 1037: Send Another Hearse / Harold Q. Masur (Dell 7737)

Paperback 1037: Dell 7737 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Send Another Hearse
Author: Harold Q. Masur
Cover artist: Greene (so he's just Greene, now? like Prince?) (see artist credit on back)

Condition: 10/10
Estimated value: $12
Best things about this cover:

• "I have other creative talents," whispered the brunette. Throatily, she added, "I hang wallpaper."
• I love Scott Jordan's expression. "Just gonna light this cigarette and settle in to watch this wallpaper-hanger lady take her clothes off and ... [ding dong] ... what the!? Goddammit, why did I even bother getting a No Solicitors sign if no one's gonna ****ing RESPECT it!?"
• I also love how jaded the title is. "Yep ... yeah ... I don't know, someone else died, I guess ... no we can't put 'em in the same hearse, you moron. SEND ANOTHER HEARSE!"

Best things about this back cover:

• That is not a martini glass. That is the Holy Grail.
• "Scott"? Come on. P.I.s go by last names. You switch to "Jordan" eventually, so your dumb first-name gambit actually makes everything weirdly unclear. Nevermind that both "Scott" and "Jordan" can be both first and last names. It's a mess. Just stick with last names, and you're good, man.
• What kind of chump just *opens* the hotel room door? No "Who is it?" or anything?

Page 123~

And, quite irrelevantly, I thought how various parts of the human anatomy behave differently under stress.

I think he's saying his penis is irrelevant, but who can be sure?

~RP

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Paperback 1036: Circle of Sin / Leslie Behan (Domino 84-700)

Paperback 1036: Domino Books 84-700 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Circle of Sin
Author: Leslie Behan
Cover artist: Photo cover

Condition: 7/10 (tight and square, but w/ water stains on edges)
Estimated value: $25-30

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• No single word is going to derail your Sexy Train faster or more efficiently than "groping."
• Jeez, male gaze much?
• "Now why don't you sit up here on my desk?" "Wh-?" "Shhh. It's standard practice." "Uh, OK, I guess. But who's that?" "Him? Oh, that's just Steve. Ignore him." "Uh..." "Good, now whatever you do, do Not look at the lamp." "Bu-" "AVERT YOUR EYES!"
• The psychologist's suit is legit hot.

Best things about this back cover:

• Groups gone WILD {CRACK!}
• "Revolved achingly" = me trying to dine at one of them revolving restaurants, no sir, I'll take my food
• stationary, as god intended, thank you very much
• I love how this goes from dumb-ass sex fiction to super dumb-ass Agatha Christie mystery on a dime! Wait, we got a body!? I'm in.

Page 123~

"You met a girl?" Durango looked at him closely. Somehow he found himself believing the answer. "Where? What girl?"
"I picked her up on Broadway. She was standing in a doorway. A hooker. I went up to her place with her."

This novel has to be sexier than this dude Forrest Gumping his way through Sex Town. Hang on ... OK here we go:

Her hands moved downward, over the tiny waist to the flat belly. She massaged the belly for a long time, moving farther downward slowly to the trembling mound beneath it. And then her fingers were nearing their target, the tips becoming slippery with the dew of passion they found there. They caught the tiny polyp of flesh awaiting them and stroking it.

I can't stop laughing at that last "sentence." As with the cover copy, this writer really, really knows how to ruin whatever meager sex vibe he's able to get going. I mean, "polyp"? That's something you discover during a colonoscopy, why would you use it to describe the clitoris, dear lord? Am I really supposed to believe a woman wrote this? "Leslie" ... OK, Leslie, aside from possibly a fake name, could also be a dude's name. All I know is a guy wrote this. A guy whose grasp of grammar, like his grasp of sexiness, is not very, uh firm. ("... and stroking it"?)

~RP

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Paperback 1029: Widow's Web / Ursula Curtiss (Ace G-561)

Paperback 1029: Ace G-561 (1st ptg, 1965)

Title: Widow's Web
Author: Ursula Curtiss
Cover artist: M. Engel (signature) (who is this?)

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $10-12

Best things about this cover:

• Well this is the weirdest damn spider I ever did see
• Head of a woman, body of a haunted house, one leg a pill bottle, the other leg a tiny couple. I pity the fly!
• This cover fits right into the Ace woman-authored suspense novel mold, reminiscent of virtually every Ace novel by, say, Charlotte Armstrong or Elisabeth Sanxay Holding (who, coincidentally, published a novel with Ace called "Widow's Mite")
• What's up with that couple? She's leaning in like "Oh, Larry, kiss me," and he's like "Wait, wait ... where did I leave my pill bottle? It was just here, I swear."

Best things about this back cover:

• Ugh, text, boo.
• "Catch-throat" is not a compound adjective I'm familiar with. I'm guessing it's a one-off invented by this reviewer to try to sound super reviewy. 
• Why is "hand" in that second blurb? That line works just fine hand(s)-free.

Page 123~

Torrant said that he would have coffee after all.

Despite his having one of fictiondom's more ridiculous names, I relate to Torrant.

~RP

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Paperback 1027: The Needs We Share / Rea Michaels (Domino 72-793)

Paperback 1027: Domino Books 72-793 (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Needs We Share
Author: Rea Michaels
Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 5/10 (terrible stain on back, else 7/10)
Estimated value: $25-30

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• This is like a half-step away from the cover of, like, a knitting magazine from the same time period. That font! That font color! Those houseplants! Put her in a cardigan and bam—feel the craft work!
• The divorcee on the couch is giving me life! She's like, "Yep, life without Harry is O, K!"
• Miss Bouffant is also amazing. So fierce. "You wanna watch! I don't care, ya ****ing pervs!" The cheapness of that slip, though, is making me very sad. I can almost hear the crappy thick nylon rubbing against, well, everything.
• I love love LOVE the Kinsey-inspired books (they are a significant subgenre of 50s/60s sleaze). Kinsey's peering behind facade of American sex lives (semi-) legitimized readers' natural voyeurism. "I'm reading this ... for science!"

Best things about this back cover:

• Yep, she's great even in isolation like that.
• Oh man, that stain. I think Dolores the divorcee got her cigarette a little too close to her nighttime reading material...
• FIND THE SINNER is soooo tacked-on. It makes no sense, especially after the dramatic final ellipse on the cover copy. Also, was the sinner hiding? Psst ... she's right there.

Page 123~

As far as the eye could see there was whiteness.

Yep, that *does* sound like suburbia.

~RP

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Paperback 1025: Hot Harem / Jill Carr (Saber Books SA-107)

Paperback 1025: Saber Books SA-107 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Hot Harem
Author: Jill Carr
Cover artist: [Bill Edwards?] [uncredited]

Condition: 8/10
Estimated value: $25-30

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• The coffee lady's mockumentary fourth-wall break is amazing
• "... whether tis nobler to make a choice for the bedroom or to eat ... something something outrageous fortune..."
• It's like the top half of blondie's body doesn't know what the bottom half's doing or vice versa
• You can almost hear cereal dude going "uhhhhhhhh...."
• Even the bacon is like "this is ridiculous, we're outta here!"

Best things about this back cover:

• Girl [space] friend. Interesting.
• LOL they can't even keep the spelling of Ann(e)'s name straight for one paragraph
• Wait, if Ann(e) is "somewhere between first and second choice" (?) ... well a. How many choices are involved? And b. Where does the horse fit into all of this?

Page 123~

I'm a Lesbian, she thought, amazed, but not horrified, yet not quite believing what she had to believe. Then she modified her own ... would you call it an accusation? And the brand burned more lightly; it didn't have to burn as deep. I'm heterosexual, Anne decided, and so is Jeanne.

Well, there's a lot to unpack here, but kudos to the writer for breaking out All The Punctuation Marks to heighten the tension. Ellipsis! Question mark! When I hit that semicolon, I was like "damn ... this is art."

~RP

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Paperback 1024: Highway Hustlers / Zan Collins (Magenta M112)

Paperback 1024: Magenta Books M112 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Highway Hustlers
Author: Zan Collins
Cover artist: God I wish I knew

Condition: 9/10. 
Estimated value: I have no idea, as this book literally appears not to exist... [update, 6/9/25—found one for $55 and it's not in as good a condition as mine, but still ... I think $50 is ballpark]

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection] 

***

Best things about this cover:

• "OK, let's take this transcontinental lesbian sex romp premise and make it ... lifeless. Oh, and make the roads look totally implausible and ignore all rules of scale and pretend depth perception isn't a thing ... oh yeah ... that's good"
• There is no shoulder to this road. They are standing in the road. Next to the world's tiniest mesa and cacti.
• Those look less like sexy poses and more like attempts to set a Guinness world record for balancing oddly
• Zan Collins. When you want a totally plausible namelike name under which to publish your crappiest fiction: Zan Collins.
• I don't think you have to worry about "minors" going anywhere near this eyesore
• That pink top is actually very cute.

Best things about this back cover:

• I can't stop laughing at the full-stop after "Unwary." Sure, it's D-grade sleaze fiction, but we're not animals—punctuate properly!
• "I am not a tramp, she kept reassuring herself" is one of the greatest lines of cover copy I've ever seen.
• Too many words. Words that do nothing but amass into a meaningless mush. Has there ever been a less climactic climax than this one?

Page 123~

"Your eyes are agleam," Meg whispered at last.

I laughed so hard at 'agleam' ... crossword people will understand. But I'll give you more, because there is more to give:

[W]hen they stripped down, Marianne noticed Meg's pointed breasts. The nipples were taut, swollen.
     She never questioned Meg as to what kind of evening she had enjoyed. But if Meg's rosettes were honest, Marianne was quite sure that she had told the young soldier goodbye in her own womanly way.

Ladies, don't you hate it when your 'rosettes' lie? Or when people call your nipples 'rosettes'? I mean, really...

~RP

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Paperback 995: Take Me In Passion / Donna Richards (Domino Books 72-929)

Paperback 995: Domino Books 72-929 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Take Me In Passion
Author: Donna Richards
Cover artist: photo cover

Condition: 7/10
Estimated value: $15-20

[new addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Best things about this cover:

• It was a weird time for metal.
• Opium Addicts Surreptitiously Admire Each Other's Bras
• "Like the wig? It's Bowie's." "Really!?" "No, I found it in a dumpster."
• "Maybe we should've gone with a professional stylist...?" "Shhh ... the panther ... he sees us ..." (seriously, what is that shadow?)
• They had to re-release this book after the original title, Take Me In Indifference, failed to move buyers.
• Love how the "Adult Reading" notice looks much more like "Exciting Feature!" than "Warning!"

Best things about this back cover:

• "They had to choose ... but could they?" Look, make up your mind. Those sad shirtless lesbians either had agency or they didn't.
• No, *you're* the passion's puppet! No puppet, no puppet! (dear future, this is a reference to a 2016 political moment that's probably best forgotten, I'm sorry)
• Wow, it gets unexpectedly Homeric there at the end, with "foreordained" this and "all-powerful, erotic destiny" that. The gods do love laughing at havoc.

Page 123~

Marty Green waggled his forefinger before the boy's nose. "No . . . you . . . don't! What do you think I am, like that broad I'm looking for? You think I'm queer like her? Well, she's not even my own daughter, what do you think of that? I adopted her, like a damn fool. Imagine? I adopted a queer!"

I know a lot is happening in this paragraph, but I'm kinda still stuck on "waggled."

~RP

P.S. bonus material from p. 123:

"You're drinking nothing! What the hell do you think I am, some kind of a hick? I'm Marty Green!"

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Paperback 948: Sin-Drome / Arthur A. Howe (Vega V-46)

Paperback 948: Vega Books V-46 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Sin-Drome
Author: Arthur A. Howe
Cover artist: that guy who did so many Vega / Fabian / Saber Books covers...

[Newest addition to the Doug Peterson Collection]

Estimated value: $15-20
Condition: 6/10

Best things about this cover:

• More awkward couch-posing. Great.
• More awkward "Sin"-punning. Great.
• Is "Dyserotic" a word?
• Ew, his right hand. Imagine that touching you. Ew.
• Suburban Insurance Salesman Vampires prefer the upper boob.
• LOL at the discreetly bolded "other"

Best things about this back cover:

• "The gun was the weapon which decided the balance of power in this situation." So sayeth SleazeNovelBot 5000.
• Man, this is the worst. It's like every sub-"Walker Texas Ranger" crime show where the killer / bad guy decides to delay and orate just long enough for the hero to come along with a roundhouse.
• I gotta say, the sexual sadism of the last part is kind of a new twist, though.
• Speaking of sadism, I shudder to think what previous owners have done to this book. Are those cigarette burns?

Page 123~

"Oh God! He's dangerous, Juelle. If he catches on there's no telling what he'll do."

Don't be cruelle, Juelle, you fooelle.

~RP

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Paperback 905: Perverted Lust Couple / Val Grasse (Royal Line 118)

Paperback 905: Royal Line RL 118 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Perverted Lust Couple
Author: Val Grasse
Cover artist: photo cover

Estimated value: Infinity dollars (none are offered on Abebooks, so I don't even know...)

[Part of the esteemed Doug Peterson collection]

Best things about this cover:

• "I'm *bored*. This perversion is *stupid*. Why is there a *tree branch* stuck in my hair? You said you were going to get a *nice* birdcage. This one smells like bird. God. It's like 'perverted lust couple' doesn't even mean anything any more..."
• The only kind of sex I can see this cover inspiring is missionary, in the dark, under the covers, weeping.
• My favorite thing about this book so far is not about the book at all, but about my blog: namely that I *already have* a "Birdcages" label/tag. What the hell were those other books?

Best things about this back cover:

• Oddly, the most confusing word on this cover is "one."
• "Hidden"? Check (twice). "Twisted"? Check (twice).
• Sorry, but "lesbian" and "homo" sound positively vanilla compared to whatever avian/oral fetish thing is happening on the cover.

Page 123~

"See, I got everything a man wants. I'm physically a woman. She placed her hands to her lower body and parted herself lewdly.

Missing close quotes here are part of the book's unique "style." This book seems to throw quotation marks in randomly. There are at least three errors (missing quotation marks) on this page alone. I think the book was typeset in some terrible sweatshop where English competence was minimal and desperation was high. And you thought the *content* of the book made you feel dirty...

~RP

P.S. this book is in amazing condition

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Paperback 840: Not I, Said the Vixen / Bill S. Ballinger (Gold Medal k1529)

Paperback 840: Gold Medal k1529 (PBO, 1965)

Title: Not I, Said the Vixen
Author: Bill S. Ballinger
Cover artist: [Bill Johnson]

Estimated value: $8-12

Donation to the collection from Mr. John Q. Brooklyn (I don't want to use real names w/o permission). Guy asks me "Can I send you a book for your blog?" Twist my arm!


Best things about this cover:

• "Isn't it true that your favorite letter is "I", Miss Lorents? ANSWER THE QUESTION!"
• "Do you deny that you are overwhelmingly sensual? DO YOU!?"
• This is a "vixen"? This looks like someone who showed up to a table reading for her role as "Vixen" in an episode of "Perry Mason." She does have a pretty boss head-tilt, but my prescription for greater vixenitude is less clothes, more gun. And … yeah, sure, go ahead and put on the glasses. OK, now shoot the D.A. and then stand over his body like, "told ya."

Best things about this back cover:

• Way to bury the lede, Gold Medal. How is PROWLED THE WORLD OF TWILIGHT WOMEN not on the cover!?
• She "ruined her lovers with the hot breath of scandal" ("scandal" being a last-minute substitute for "chili cheese fries")
• "Please state your name for the record." "Ivy Lorents." "And how do you spell 'Ivy,' Miss Lorents? I presume it starts 'I', 'V'…" "Not I." "Objection! Permission to treat the vixen as sensual, your honor."

Page 123~

"You had her … falling all over herself," Ivy said, pleased with the memory of Pauline's discomfort.

Please invest that sentence with all the Sapphic innuendo you can muster.

~RP

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Paperback 831: April Evil / John D. MacDonald (Gold Medal d1579)

Paperback 831: Gold Medal d1579 (1st thus, 1965)

Title: April Evil
Author: John D. MacDonald
Cover artist: Bill Johnson

Estimated value: $10-$15


Best things about this cover:

• The hot new book that finally answers the question: How many trenchcoated, fedoraed detectives does it take to find a lost contact lens?
• You know what they say: April Evil brings May Bondage.
• After looking at this picture, I wonder if it's not the "hold-up gang" that's "sleepy."
• This is a fine, if weird, painting. Good use of small canvas. Her simple white top and blue skirt, surrounded by the lurking, drab frames of generic menace, make her really pop off the page.

Best things about this back cover:

• Ugh.
• Don't you hate it when women choose the easy sluttish rut? Challenge yourselves, ladies!
• How can you be "going to flab" while "losing something in the guts department"? Writing 101: don't let your stupid metaphors cancel each other out.

Page 123~

She smiled, and she felt cat-agile, rabbit-soft, mare-ready.

This was a vast improvement from a half hour earlier, when she had felt dog-tired, armadillo-hard, and lemur-unprepared.

~RP

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Paperback 751: The Oddballs / Stacey Clubb (Softcover Library B853X)

Paperback 751: Softcover Library B853X (PBO, 1965)

Title: The Oddballs
Author: Stacey Clubb
Cover artist: Uncredited

Yours for: Not For Sale—part of the Doug Peterson Collection


Best things about this cover:

• "I don't think they're so odd," he said, self-consciously.
• So many questions. Such as, where has her right arm got to? Or, why their bed is a parallelogram?
• Remember the fad of wearing two differently colored stockings!? Me either.
• "You awake? … tickle tickle! … alright then, I'm just going to remove your head with my jaws now, OK? Just relax."
• "The only practical sex was unnatural sex!" — Having trouble understanding the use of the word "practical" here. "Well, see, I would just put my penis in your vagina, but … it's really not practical for me ... right now … at this juncture … you know? So, let's just bring in the elephant and the mustard and see how it goes, mkay? It's just easier that way."

Best things about this back cover:

• Shadowy = Lesbiany. In case you're unfamiliar with paperback code.
• INA, ha ha! Calling all crossword constructors, we got a live one!
• I want a business card that reads "Encourager of odd rites and practices."

Page 123~

The sting of his blow had not penetrated.

Nope, sorry, that was just the first thing I opened to. Hang on … OK, here we go:

"Bernice," he called out.

But the bikini-clad goddess who appeared casually at the top of the mezzanine stairs in response to his blithe summons was not, of course, Bernice.

If ever there was a name custom-made for softcore porn, that name is Blithe Summons.

~RP

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Paperback 720: That Kind of Girl / Stanley Curson (Brandon House 741)

Paperback 720: Brandon House 741 (PBO, 1965)

Title: That Kind of Girl
Author: Stanley Curson
Cover artist: [Fred Fixler]

Yours for: $35


Best things about this cover:

• Which kind of girl? Prematurely gray? Exceedingly tanned? Vinyl-loving? Shoe-collecting?
• Seriously, those shoes, in all their green-ness and out-of-context-ness, totally make this cover.
• V is for Vortex Of Forbidden Love 
• I like that Ms. Gray is making a big "V" with her arms. Why she's covering her crotch with jazz hands, I don't know.

Best things about this back cover:

• The pic itself is kind of adorable.  Hey! Lurid text! Leave those kids alone!

Page 123~

Anne gripped his organ experimentally …

OK, I cheated. This is page 122. But what was I supposed to do? Ignore this sentence? I throw myself on the mercy of the court.

~RP

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